To wonder what runs through some people's heads sometimes?

[FattyAirways]

I was at a cafe enjoying breakfast. The cafe is big, got around 25 tables in. I was the only one in the cafe. A couple, came in, placed their order at the till and came and sat at the table right beside me! They had 20-odd other tables to choose from. My table wasn't in an enviable position in the cafe, no views out of the window, nothing special about this area in the cafe, yet they chose to do this. Why?

I do think if one person sits at a table for four on a train then they can expect kids/family will want the table seats as well. When my children were younger the table seats were so much more practical and one person sitting there wouldn’t put me off using it. It would make more sense for the woman who wanted to make phone calls to find herself an empty two seater.

I would never do this. I am very aware of personal space and would never dream of sitting so near to somebody when there are other options. And it’s just weird to butt into strangers’ conversations uninvited.

But I don’t get as furious and worked up as many on here. Probably part of the ‘I prefer dogs to people’ brigade. I do wonder how these fragile easily-upset folk would cope in a more crowded or impoverished place where people have to live on top of each other. Being around others is just part of life.

The parking preciousness always amuses me. I live in London and am delighted to find a parking place on my road, and can reverse park into a space anywhere and feel relieved to get a space. The parking hysteria on threads like this is quite hilarious.

I totally agree with you, headstone.
If SW2002 really did that (let's face it, it could easily be made up), it was incredibly bloody rude.
Those people were minding their own business when they sat where they did, and are every bit as entitled to choose which empty table to sit at as the people already seated at another table. They did absolutely nothing to deserve what must have been a very upsetting verbal assault.

Why would someone assume it would be ok to join another group of strangers?

If there is nowhere to sit and it’s a long table with the intent to share the table but not interrupt another group, I understand but being a part of a couple and walking up to a group of strangers and asking to join their table of there are other places to sit is weird.

phoenixrosehere · Today 10:42
TheBerry · Today 07:12

Honestly, I think that’s mean! The woman must have thought it would be nice to connect with some fellow humans or something. You can still say no, but isn’t it nice just to say it like “oh, I’m sorry, my daughter and I are catching up, just the two of us” or whatever.

“Why would someone assume it would be ok to join another group of strangers?

If there is nowhere to sit and it’s a long table with the intent to share the table but not interrupt another group, I understand but being a part of a couple and walking up to a group of strangers and asking to join their table of there are other places to sit is weird.”

Thanks, I agree! She wasn’t alone, there were two of them, the man had gone in to the service area. It was a small table for 4, at the far end of the terrace where we were quietly enjoying the birds. There were at least 15 other tables, with no one else at them.

Yeah I mean it’s not something I’d do, but some people are genuinely like this. I think they enjoy making that human connection, and probably find it uplifting to have a brief conversation with a stranger.

If they’re not being mean or unpleasant then I see no reason to be rude or abrasive to them. You can say no in a nice way.

Maybe they have dementia.

Maybe they have autism.

“If they’re not being mean or unpleasant then I see no reason to be rude or abrasive to them. You can say no in a nice way.”

I think it’s rude and abrasive to interrupt the peaceful enjoyment of strangers. There’s nothing not “nice” about saying a simple “no” in answer to a straightforward question. No lengthy explanations or excuses needed.

I had this in a car park. I had parked on the top floor which was completely empty. I returned to car and opened both rear doors to start loading shopping.

A car appeared and signalled to get into space right next to me, waiting for me to shut the car door so it could get in. It then carefully squeezed in between my car and the pillar, leaving barely enough room for them to squeeze out.

I had to ask them why they gad done this. We always park here was the answer.

😂

This is MN. Someone had to say it. Them's the rules.

I mean, we'd already had this one as the very first post.

@ifIwerenotanandroid

You've quoted me and I've zero idea what your comment means. Can you clarify, thanks.

Totally agree. If someone sitting quietly minding their own business and you choose to interrupt them, don’t then get upset with a short sharp no.

‘have always been the kind of person to believe in taking charge of the situation, tt makes DW cringe sometimes. The flip side though, is that we do usually get what we want.’

Probably. This is a Very Important Man who Takes Charge in order to Get What He Wants.

This one made me laugh out loud . Totally nuts.

That was to @Quietasamouuse . Dunno why the quote didn’t appear 🤷‍♀️

This happened to us on a wide open, virtually empty Scottish beach. There was literally 100’s of yards of empty shoreline, but a couple parked their deckchairs directly between us and the sea. why would you do that!?

See my post before that one, quoting someone else (who, I assume, is making a joke). On every MN thread, someone explains a person's behaviour as (a) autism, (b) dementia or (c) being a foreigner.

It's a joke about MN. Not getting at you at all. And anyway, sometimes/one day, it WILL BE down to (a) autism, (b) dementia or (c) being a foreigner.

@ifIwerenotanandroid 👍

That may be the case, but they also have to be aware and realise that not everyone wants that especially if they’re in a conversation with someone else.

It’s rude to walk up to a group of strangers and expect to sit with them because of a personal desire for human contact.

I would say that all they need to do is to graciously accept the no, if it’s said in a nice way.

If they persist after the no then obviously they are mental. THAT would be rude, not them just asking in the first place.

A thoroughly unpleasant way for you to behave - the couple had every right to sit where they wanted in a public house. Why didn't you and your wife move if you weren't happy sitting next to them? It wouldn't surprise me to learn your wife was silently cringing during this encounter and had anything but a 'nice time'.

I remember years ago going to the cinema with DH .... walked in and the place was empty except for one couple sitting in the middle of the cinema, middle of the row. I followed DH up the steps, he entered their row, forcing them to get up to allow him past, then sat at the end of their row. WHO DOES THAT!!

I walked along the row in front watching this, rolling my eyes at the couple.

Flippin’ ‘eck! That’s a divorce-able offence in my book! 😂

My pal (male) tells a story of going to a small screen cinema to see some arty film and literally being the only person there in the middle row, middle seat. Then a random man comes in and sits beside him 😂

Re the cafe, my pal is immuno compromised and has no life since covid. She can only go somewhere airy and empty so would often find a v quiet time to go for coffee alone. This type of thing has happened a few times and it's been really upsetting, she either has to ask them to move which involves explaining herself or she has to leave