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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Pedestrian holding parking space

161 replies

carparkcow · 22/05/2023 17:10

As soon as this happened today I told DH I just HAD to open it up to the wrath of AIBU... very interested to hear opinions!

We were circling the hospital car park which was extremely busy as always. Finally see a lady pulling out of a space a little further up the row and thank our lucky stars. However, as we go to pull into it there is a pedestrian stood there and says she has claimed the space for her husband and points at a car literally on the other side of the car park.

I was pretty stressed about my appointment (scan to check for MC) and essentially told the woman that she was completely out of order, this wasn't in the spirit of the law of the car park and we would happily block the space and take the fine to prevent her being able to park there, such was my fury.

So - AIBU?! SURELY this isn't acceptable behaviour??!!!!!

OP posts:
marshmallowmatcha · 22/05/2023 20:18

I think the nature of hospital car parks mean people may not be thinking their best. They never have enough spaces. People often need to be somewhere quickly. However the fairest way to do it would be for whoever got to the car park first to have the next available space. If they have been circling for 10 minutes and then you drive in and straight to the space then this doesn't feel fair. (Not that that is what you did). So what is needed is some sort of system where cars are given a ticket - like at the deli counters and then when a space is available a caller like the self checkouts can say SPACE NUMBER 12 please. And the person at the front of the queue goes to that space.

ILoveToSquanderPromise · 22/05/2023 20:19

This happened to me in 2009 in an RHS car park. A woman was reserving a spot for her mother who was driving around the car park with her baby and they needed the mother and baby space I was about to pull into, because she had a baby - I rolled my windows down and showed her my 3 babies. I suggested three with a lone parent trumped one baby and two adults. She suggested I fuck off. I suggested she got out of the space before I ran her over. You can guess the ebb and flow of the conversation Grin However she didn't budge an inch because her babeeee was sooo special and I went home and cried because did I mention I had 3 babies. Still pissed off about it tbh.

marshmallowmatcha · 22/05/2023 20:20

ILoveToSquanderPromise · 22/05/2023 20:19

This happened to me in 2009 in an RHS car park. A woman was reserving a spot for her mother who was driving around the car park with her baby and they needed the mother and baby space I was about to pull into, because she had a baby - I rolled my windows down and showed her my 3 babies. I suggested three with a lone parent trumped one baby and two adults. She suggested I fuck off. I suggested she got out of the space before I ran her over. You can guess the ebb and flow of the conversation Grin However she didn't budge an inch because her babeeee was sooo special and I went home and cried because did I mention I had 3 babies. Still pissed off about it tbh.

RHS as in the flower show?

Funkyslippers · 22/05/2023 20:25

marshmallowmatcha but you didn't trump her because you had more children than her. You trumped her because your car was there first

woodhill · 22/05/2023 20:29

Just ridiculous

Yanbu

I can't be doing with nonsense like that

pear6782 · 22/05/2023 20:59

It’s definitely not acceptable. However, times have changed and people can get really aggressive. Saw something similar in a shopping car park. A car was trying to turn into a space where a woman was waiting. They must have thought she was getting out of another car and were inching in whilst expecting her to move. Cue an aggressive family member hurtling toward them from a car quite a way off with a barrage of abuse. The driver was so shaken they just left the car park.

funinthesun19 · 22/05/2023 20:59

I really hope she shifted out of the way. Yanbu.

Spacestace · 22/05/2023 21:09

QuintanaRoo · 22/05/2023 20:02

Totally agree hospital top trumps is very unsavoury so I’m surprised you brought up dying relatives. The luck of the draw is which car gets there first. If everyone chucks their passengers out to scrabble infront of cars the poor driver with no passenger will never get parked

Show quote history

If you read my post you'd see I was just saying I can see why people do it and I wouldn't get annoyed about it- especially not hours after the fact. I was the car without a passenger ffs, perhaps reading comprehension isn't your strong point.

Irridescantshimmmer · 22/05/2023 21:22

Hope the hospital parking company send her a fine for parking her self in a space, like a rat up a drainpipe.

I think you could have threatened her with the police for delibratly causing you to be late for or delaying an important hospital appointment as it is anti social behaviour.

LaMaG · 22/05/2023 21:27

YANBU. I once had 3 teenagers literally sitting in a space I tried to pull into in a city centre, there was a road closure or something, no parking anywhere and loads of cars stressed circling around. I had to drive off but was livid. Obviously told by a parent to get a space. Can you imagine the mayhem if this became the norm?

Original poster
carparkcow · 22/05/2023 21:32

Sorry should have been clearer - she did move in the end and we parked in the space! I think her husband was a bit mortified

OP posts:
QuintanaRoo · 22/05/2023 21:47

Spacestace · 22/05/2023 21:09

If you read my post you'd see I was just saying I can see why people do it and I wouldn't get annoyed about it- especially not hours after the fact. I was the car without a passenger ffs, perhaps reading comprehension isn't your strong point.

Show quote history

No I totally understood you……you said you would have done it if you’d had a passenger. My comprehension skills are just fine thanks. I’m disagreeing with you that I think it’s an acceptable thing to do.

crossstitchingnana · 22/05/2023 21:56

KarmaStar · 22/05/2023 17:18

Yanbu.it's akin to bagging a table in a cafe before you've bought food.

I do this, and always will. Not buying food to find there's no table.

notsorighteousthesedays · 22/05/2023 22:02

@FergalforPM so you parked in the Emergency drop off and you think you're better than me!! Did you put your hazards on? 😱
Get a life.....

Ariela · 22/05/2023 22:30

One has to ask why you bothered trying to park in the hopsital car park if it's anything like ours never a space! But yes she was out of order, like the people that sit and block a table when you've queued 15 minutes for food in the cafeteria and there is NOWHERE to sit because 40% of the tables are bagged by people without food in front of them, and you know they're waiting for someone a long way behind you.

FergalforPM · 22/05/2023 22:35

notsorighteousthesedays · 22/05/2023 22:02

@FergalforPM so you parked in the Emergency drop off and you think you're better than me!! Did you put your hazards on? 😱
Get a life.....

I parked correctly at all times, no "hazards" required - both at the point where she was admitted and on the subsequent 20 days of visiting before she died. At no point did I engage the services of a passenger to jump out and "reserve" a space because in my eyes that is cuntish behaviour that I prefer not to do.

marshmallowmatcha · 22/05/2023 22:37

Funkyslippers · 22/05/2023 20:25

marshmallowmatcha but you didn't trump her because you had more children than her. You trumped her because your car was there first

I don't have a car so I don't know why you're tagging me

Drywhitefruitycidergin · 22/05/2023 22:43

YANBU - I've done exactly what you did. Indicated and waited - person with pedestrian couldn't have got car past me.
First come first served - in the vehicle.....ofc.
Didn't bring a friend to the hospital - ah sorry you need to keep driving round while people race across to bagsy spaces.
Had she also called shotgun on the seats in the waiting room?

Mayorquimby2 · 22/05/2023 22:57

Nah it's a cunts trick, only happened to me once but I just edged in far enough that traffic could get by and then blanked the two women trying to reserve the space and waited for them to give up the ghost which took about 3 minutes.

chickbean · 22/05/2023 22:59

Reminds me of my favourite scene in "Fried Green Tomatoes at the Whistlestop Cafe"

BEST of Kathy Bates * Fried Green Tomatoes

Compilation of Kathy Bates playing Evelyn Couch in Fried Green Tomatoes

https://youtu.be/akA8co61He4

SW2002 · 22/05/2023 23:02

No not on. Drive into the space anyway, she will move.

You drive incredibly slowly (like a childs toddling pace when they first learn to walk), but you keep moving no matter what. You will not hurt them, you'll simply push them back, but it's not physically possible for them to stop a 1-2 ton vehicle.
Once you're in the space job done. Then take a photo on your phone of them and the car reg when it shows up to try and take the space. Tell them if you come back to find any damage on your car you'll be forwarding photos to the police.

Xenia · 22/05/2023 23:06

It is not standard practice although in a cafe it would be normal for one to sit down whilst the rest got food.

EasterBreak · 22/05/2023 23:08

Yanbu and should have edged in ever so slowly. She'd have moved.

DollyParkin · 22/05/2023 23:16

KarmaStar · 22/05/2023 17:18

Yanbu.it's akin to bagging a table in a cafe before you've bought food.

But on MN one person bagging a table in a cafe while the other stands in line is seen as totally acceptable and anyone protesting is seen as precious.

Defender90 · 22/05/2023 23:21

I've never considered doing this and recently I've had both my DH and DDad at hospital with the standard crappy parking situation. I stay in the car and look for spaces, they go in to their appt and I join if I get parked. It's not ideal but it's what you have to do these days.