Tight fisted friend.

[Manders64]

I have friend (few years now) who is great fun and I love her company - but… she comes over often for dinner and stays over. She has often arrived empty handed and drunk and smoked and eaten here. I mentioned the mooching once and she took the hint and started arriving with a bottle of wine (which she drinks). Last night she arrived with an opened bottle of gin and some tonic saying she couldn’t find my favorite wine. We drank my wine, smoked, ate dinner and drank my whisky. She stayed over and had breakfast and took leftovers for her lunch. I then noticed she’d taken her gin and tonic with her - this has super irritated me as I feel that she’s taking liberties AIBU?

Someone in my family has been behaving similarly over the last few months. Final straw was yesterday when they made what seemed to be a nice offer to help DS. He accepted as he thought at least they were trying to "repay" the debt in kind.
They then messaged back "Happy to help:) can you just send me petrol money?"
They are skint because of a daft choice we all advised against. Completely avoidable situation. We've realised several of us have been hit up for cash - we all thought it was solely us. So there'll be no more money for them.

A very unattractive quality. Puts me off someone.

Why don't you just ask her? Tell her exactly what you've written here? Why are you so tight? You always come over to my house, don't bring .... last night you didn't even bring my favourite wine, worse still took your own G&T back home?

I have an old friend like this. She has very occasionally asked us round for a meal but the meal is always awful: watery stew, dead grapes or dried up apples for dessert, stale cheese if we're lucky.

Her husband is in the wine trade and, though we take a decent bottle with us, he will produce a bottle of undrinkable rubbish saying something like "This is an interesting bottle".
It's no good going out with her, she will take us somewhere local to her, order the most expensive dishes on the menu and then split the bill straight down the middle.
Some years ago we invited her to our big anniversary party in a restaurant. She proceeded to guzzle as much of the (free) wine as she could and was so drunk when we all went back to our house that she couldn't get up the stairs unaided (another friend asked us if she was an alcoholic). She also opened every single bottle of champagne that had been bought for us as presents, taking a glass from each. Most of them were still in their gift bags.
Needless to say we now avoid seeing her - and in fact she doesn't have our address at the moment, though she does send an occasional plaintive email asking for it.

Yes, this is true. Our mean friend had a very mean mother who was a doctor so comfortably off.

I find meanness to be such an off-putting trait in someone. It genuinely baffles me; being generous feels so good, why would anyone run so fast the opposite direction? And tight people always seem to feel hard done by so they're not really benefiting from their 'savings'.

I have no idea what to do in OP's situation as I've had a friend for decades doing this sort of stuff. Because of the way costs 'flow' during gatherings with different people bringing stuff or paying for rounds or a meal here and there which all evens out demanding one person pays half every time. Yet she is never the person offering and always the person dodging the bill.

I've severely cooled the friendship now to acquaintance levels.

I don't agree this friend sees OP as a doormat either. This person has worked out a strategy to navigate through life and treats everyone like this. The only response is to call her out every single time (which gets exhausting and unpleasant) or step away from her.

Yes its not nice at all. It puts me off doing things with them socially. Or the dithering at the till lol

Stop inviting her.

I think you know from the replies she is being a cheeky mare and you are letting her. I like the idea of a quick text to ask where the gin went.

Going forward, don't invite her again.

If she does come again then hide all the booze under your bed or in the wardrobe and say you are on the wagon for a few months. And do something like cheese on toast or an omelette - or salad if the weather is warm. Nothing that creates leftovers for tomorrows lunch. Cut off all the options for her cheeky mareness to rear its head.