Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to tell 8 year old to entertain themselves at 7am on Sunday morning

144 replies

naturallydelicious · 21/05/2023 08:43

Every weekend morning without fail as soon as she opens her eyes my 8 year old keeps telling me and my husband to get up
Out of bed . This can be as early as 6am . She keeps saying she's bored or she has nothing to do& will keep going on about it until one of us gets up . Bear in mind she has a room full of toys , books , puzzles , arts and crafts , a tv and iPad so loads to do . We never stay in bed past 8.30/9am on weekends and we're both up at 6am Mon to Friday . I usually get up when she insists because I feel guilty lying in bed when she asks me to get up . But ,this morning after her moaning at us to get up I shouted at her to go play in her room and I'd get up soon . I now feel awful ... was I being unreasonable?

OP posts:
Sussexcricket · 21/05/2023 11:08

If my seven year old Wakes before me at the weekend she doesn't wake me up.
I have a two year old though so am.up but I can't wait until she's old enough to amuse herself for a bit at the weekends.
Yanbu

HowardKirksConscience · 21/05/2023 11:12

Cosycover · 21/05/2023 09:14

I think one of you should get up.

She clearly doesn't feel comfortable being up alone.

Well she needs to learn to occupy herself then, at eight years old. She’s not a toddler. She could read or draw or play with her toys. Or just lie in bed and have a little think to herself. Learn to fit in around other people and their needs.

Some people have completely bonkers ideas about childhood these days.

Mañanarama · 21/05/2023 11:13

We got our kids little digital clocks when they were old enough to recognise numbers, around when they started school. They were not allowed to get up (except for a wee) before the first digit was a 7.

slithytoveisascientist · 21/05/2023 11:14

We don't get up till 11 on Sundays 😂 it's our one lie in day. The kids get themselves up, get cereal and go on screens. It's been like this about 3 years now, they are 8 and 10.

Tourmalines · 21/05/2023 11:15

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

No, 6 am is NOT reasonable if the parents want to sleep in ! She can go and lie in their bed if she wants but she just wants them up, because that’s what SHE wants. They have the rest of the day for heaven’s sake. She acts stroppy if they don’t respond to her, so the dictating needs to ne nipped in the bud !

adviceneeded1990 · 21/05/2023 11:19

DeflatedAgain · 21/05/2023 09:55

As a child my only TV time at the weekend was when mum was sleeping. Was definitely my incentive to not wake her up 😝

That’s what we do 😂 we’re generally screen free so only chance for the iPad is when we’re asleep. Usually from when she gets up around 8 to when we get up at 9.

inloveandmarried · 21/05/2023 11:19

Absolutely ok for them to be up and about sorting themselves out. But not to disturb other members of the family.

As others say, set up breakfast things for them and help have the TV accessible for an hour or so.

Do you have an Alexa?

I'd program her to have a 'don't wake up mum and dad' alarm. Set for 8am. Teach your 8 year old how to ask Alexa how much time is left remaining on the timer.

Once in rings he'll know it's ok to disturb you.

Our rule was always always not to wake mum before 8am unless there is a situation they don't feel able to cope with.

Gcsunnyside23 · 21/05/2023 11:22

Wow I wouldn't have let this go in until she's 8. My 8 year old gas known for a few years now what is acceptable times to get up/wake people up and 6am is not it. He knows he's allowed to watch TV from 8 any time before he goes back to sleep or plays. Generally we are up and around from 9 at the latest in weekends and if he wants breakfast before then he knows where to get it. You need to encourage her to be more self sufficient and to play in her own. Is she an only child?

adviceneeded1990 · 21/05/2023 11:23

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

@Tourmalines just out of interest do you work full time outside of the home? We both do 40 hour weeks and are up at 6 Mon-Fri and if we were woken at 6 on a weekend day I’d cry! 8 at the earliest is the rule here! However, I have a friend who gets up at 6:30 with her child at the weekend and is quite superior about it…SAHM with a school age child though so 6 hours a day 5 days a week to rest if she chooses too! 😆

adviceneeded1990 · 21/05/2023 11:24

Oops sorry @Tourmalines I meant @Achwheesht

Vallmo47 · 21/05/2023 11:26

Ha, she’s a little madam like I was. 😂 She can definitely learn to entertain herself for a bit. On weekends parents rise at 8am, end of story.

MickyShell · 21/05/2023 11:29

"Oh yes, DD it's great you got me up as we've got lots of things to do this morning. You can empty the dishwasher while I get some breakfast ready and then you need to put this pile of clothes away, then strip your bed and put the sheets in the washing machine. Let me know when you have done that and then you can get started on that homework. Yes, I really should get up as soon as you do - we can get a great headstart on the day so we can relax later on 😁👍🏼,"

I imagine it won't be long before she's creeping round as quiet as a mouse with the TV on near silent. 😉

Notimeforaname · 21/05/2023 11:40

Neither of you get up next time..that's the only way she'll learn.
And if she keeps coming into you when you tell her not to, you punish her appropriately for not listening to her parents.

DeflatedAgain · 21/05/2023 11:40

@adviceneeded1990

Haha, I'm praying it works with my DS when he's older 🤞

LovelyLovelyWarmCoffee · 21/05/2023 11:49

I’ll share the genius hack I have with my 8/9yo: they are not allowed to wake us up before homework is done, they have had breakfast and are dressed.

So either they wake you up fairly early but at least they are ready. Or they don’t wake you up
because they prefer to play.
Usually they play for a while, then they are hungry so have bk, brings it to around 9 when they want to wake us up so start on the homework… and wake us up around 10. (If we are not awake by then, most of then time we are but after a rare night out it is bliss).

Honestly this is brilliant.

Stressfordays · 21/05/2023 11:51

I've been frisbeeing an ipad at mine in a morning since they were about 3/4. I'm a lone parent and work shifts. If I've got a day off with no school run, sports matches or work, you can guarantee I am sleeping in until 9 at the earliest. Might even have an afternoon nap too and give them screens again. My kids soon learnt the more sleep I got, the less grumpy I was and more likely to take them to the park 🤣

Shadyladyo · 21/05/2023 11:54

She is being unreasonable. Massively! I have an only who is 8 and she’ll come downstairs get cereal and watch TV, play iPad until I get up. She never wakes me. In fact once I accidentally slept until 11 and she’d had a whale of a time!

Kanaloa · 21/05/2023 11:55

I think you’re unreasonable for waiting this long. Mine knew from about 5/6 that waking me at 6am on a weekend wasn’t going to happen. And sulking and demanding parents to get up and entertain you at age 8 is not on at all. I’d let her know there are consequences if she blatantly refuses to do what she’s told and follow through on them. Otherwise she’s going to live her life believing everyone should jump to her tune whenever it suits her.

LittleBearPad · 21/05/2023 12:03

She’s being massively unreasonable, you’ve told her not to do this and I think it was ok to shout as she’s been told numerous times and is old enough to have some consideration.

arethereanyleftatall · 21/05/2023 12:07

Wow,I wouldnt have tolerated this for years. I expect the reason she is like this now is precisely because it's been tolerated for too long.

Achwheesht · 21/05/2023 12:09

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

stealthbanana · 21/05/2023 12:10

6am is early. I recommend the mella clocks which glow green when they reach a certain time and glow yellow for a period beforehand (so if they wake up and the clock is dark they know it’s way too early, if it’s glowing yellow it’s almost time to get up) - we’ve trained ours to 7am this way.

i must say though I’m amazed how many parents of 8 year olds are sleeping in til 830/9 - this seems super late to me. I wouldn’t be happy if mine were doing 2 hours of screens in the morning while we snoozed, 7am is a reasonable wake up time when you’re a young family imo (and yes both of us work full time). I do t think it’s in kids interests to have wildly different wake up times from week day to weekend.

pennycoins · 21/05/2023 12:11

When our DC were younger we had a 'don't come in to our room before 8am' rule on a weekend unless there's an emergency 😂😂

Flittingaboutagain · 21/05/2023 12:12

Zhougzhoug · 21/05/2023 08:50

I think it’s totally OK to leave them to play for an hour or so at that age. In general, DH and I take it in turns to get up so we each get one good weekend lie in. On a weekend the “on duty” parent might come back to bed for an hour or so or doze on the sofa after getting some toast and putting Moana on the telly or whatever.

But we also have a “don’t wake us up before 7am” policy so we’ve invented this thing called “picture of the day” where if DC wakes before 7am they have to draw us a picture and come and show it to us at 7. You get some really cute pics and they learn to tell the time while you’re asleep.

Picture of the day is such a brilliant idea!

Achwheesht · 21/05/2023 12:12

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

Swipe left for the next trending thread