Unfair comment to make yes or no

[Notlivinglife]

I work with this particular colleague fairly regularly (just 2 of us in the office) Personally I'm not a big fan but I try to be civil with her as difficult as it is for work sake. We have got on in the past on and off and have had quite good conversations about women's issues mainly menopause, coils etc. as we are both in that category so both affected. In the office one day working with her and it was just too hot, sweaty & stuffy for me but she insisted on keeping the office window closed. It was hot outside! I flipped out and told her how selfish she was for not even asking if I would like the window open even slightly!
Her comment back was "Well why don't you hang yourself out to dry". Fair or unfair?

Her reply was rude.

Well you were both rude

So did you actually ask her if you could open the window or not? Your post isn't clear on that part.

You both sound incredibly immature.

So you got mad at her for not knowing you were hot?

You both sounded snipey

You both sound rude.

Get a fan

You both sound bonkers. Also a bit confused when you say you are both “in the same category”. Does that mean you are both women?

You 'flipped out?' That's so unprofessional. You sound as bad as each other, to be honest.

Well why don't you hang yourself out to dry". Fair or unfair?

At least she didn't add "by your neck" to the comment.

Silver linings and all that.

"Silver linings and all that" 🤣

I'm not a big fan but I try to be civil with her as difficult as it is for work sake.
You have to try to be civil? In 30+ years of working there have been a few colleagues that I really haven’t liked but work is work and civility should be a professional courtesy.
We have got on in the past on and off and have had quite good conversations about women's issues mainly menopause, coils etc. as we are both in that category so both affected.
Sounds horrendous, what a topic to discuss in work. As someone who’s ‘in that category’ it’s the last thing I would discuss with a colleague. Stop the inane chat, ask for a fan and get on with your work.
You seem as bad as each other.

You both sound insufferable

You sound like a Victoria Wood sketch.
Done badly.
Have you both tried getting on with your work rather than discussing your wombs all day?

Two women going through the menopause at the same time, stuck in an office together and presumably having hot flushes which don't coincide. It's a recipe for disaster. You are both trying to get through a difficult transition and it is a tough time. The PPs clearly haven't been there yet - they will learn! Think of things that will help the situation eg have a cold drink always to hand, wear layers so you can always strip one off, have excuses to go for a walk when you feel your temper rising - go to the stockroom to count the paperclips if nothing else comes to mind.

Both rude

In all honesty you both sound angry and unprofessional

You're both rude. And probably have different ideas of what constitutes "hot".

And you started it with the name calling so ... 🤷🏻‍♀️

Agreed 😂

I used to work with women like this, spent all day tirelessly talking about "women's problems" it was really tiresome then as I'm sure I'd still find it if I had to work in that environment now. There is a time and place.
So YABU for boring convos, YABU for not politely asking if she minded if you opened a window and YABU for going off at her.
What does "hang yourself out to dry" even mean? It's not an expression I've heard before. Did she mean go outside because you were sweaty and damp?

You both sound rude but you were rude first and you can’t complain about her being selfish because you wanted her to open the window because you were hot but she wasn’t.
I couldn’t imagine being too hot in my office in May. Air con is always on. I would be freezing if someone else was always dictating the windows were opened and so would most people.
I don’t turn the heating up when I’m cold - i wear appropriate clothing so if you know you’re going to be hot you should do the same.

Am I the only one who found that comment funny and also said "Huh"?

"Well why don't you hang yourself out to dry?"

Sounds like something an 8 year old would say as a retort: "Well so is your face!" type of comment.

It's both funny and childish. Rude I guess.

Anyway, OP you can buy a fan. It can be difficult for 2 people to share a space when they feel different things. Perhaps you both can agree to open the window for a set amount of time just to air the place out too.

It's not confusing, they're a similar age going through similar women's issues such as menopause.

@notsayingmuch Kudos for you for giving a helpful reply!

@shivawn

Yes I grasped that, just the use of the word "category" is a bit odd. Makes them both sound like consumer goods.

six of one, half a dozen of the other