to not want people to judge those who recieve benefits????

[TidyTink]

Im a single mother of one,

i was working up until my DD (3) was born, rather than take a part time job that i knew i would always be stuck in i decided to get to college and study asubject that will lead me to a very hard working and well paid job so that i can fully support my DD in the future.

I hate recieving benefits and cannot wait untill i have finished my degree

Once i start at work i will be paying enough taxes in the future to more than cover the benefits ive recieved over the few yrs.

So why does everyone assume your a complete waste of space?? not all of us take advantage of the system!!!!

Nice post Micegg..

Expat - you have hit the nail on the head !
So brilliantly put - I salute you ....

I am ashamed to live in a country where at the moment the rich are clearly getting much richer much quicker and others are struggling simply to feed themselves ..

to OP , sorry that you feel like this ...those who judge really I think do so in ignorance because 1) as expat says the corporate pocketing of cash is less visible and 2) those who judge have been fortunate so far not to have had that need and hopefully never will..... Also best of luck with your studies.

Am bewildered why people are so keen to have a go at those on benefits , not a lot of money per week when politicians are taking a heck of a lot of money per week out of the system ??????????????

oh don't you'll start me off crying (hormones - af/pmt and all! lol) but yes it's horrid - amd i'm sure a lot of the mums on this side would feel the same. I think in the end that day H managed to find a packet of pasta for DS - he had somehting to eat but it wasn't enough from my POV. still - went straight to iceland (I know I know but hey food's food! lol) and got some bits for the night.

no6 - as I get maint from XH once i'm working they'll be taking it into account (they don't now) we don't hold any savings or shares in property/pensions. so yes XH is good to still provide for his son we're caught in a bad place really as we prob won't get as much help for the rent am hoping somehow it will all work out.

I would imagine i'm not the only mum on here in the same position, (or couple for that fact) it's a bloody hard life - and why on earth anyone would choose it is beyond my understanding. still, hopefully won't be for much longer.

And I'm ashamed to have lived in two of the richest countries in the world where so little compassion is given to the poor, particularly the children of the poor.

It's shocking and quite frankly tragic, especially in how stubborn and pervasive a sentiment it appears to be.

skidoodle put it perfectly, it's a hateful mindset that some of the most vulnerable and poor in this society (children, especially) are villifed in such a way.

I remember those bloody milk vouchers- we used to go to Sainsburys simply because it was across the road from us but where we were it was considered the posh option (no waitrose ro M&S), and every time we used them the cashier would hold them up and yell to a manager 'Do we take these?'- really humiliating! I was pregnant (DH lost his job during the few weeks before I was due), and even though nobody said anything to me, I felt convinced that everyone thought I was some kind of drop as many kids as you can and live off the benefits type. Used to really bother me.

It was a horrible life.

In the end we lost our house (we had to sell it as we couldn't afford the repayments or to run the car - was in the middle of nowhere and without a car you couldn't get to a shop or GP or anything), and we've been in rented ever since and probably always will be. But it's been worth it. We're so much happier now, and although we do have our stresses 9disabled kids mainly) Dh has been healthier since then as well. I'd much rather have a Dh I love and be doing my degree and able to move forwards than have a house any day (Dh tried to kill himself at the worst point, he'd have suceeded eventually if things ahdn't changed). And when i go abck to work, Dh will go to Uni and get his chance to attain some dreams.

So OP- things CAN change and they DO improve. And I hope you (and everybody else struggling on this thread) gets that chance too. 5 years ago we were facing homelessness, divorce, Dh ws sos eriously ill- now life is so different.

That doesn't make sense LOL

AFTER selling house we rented a place opposite Sainsburys

Much more coherent!

It seems to me, that it's not also not least the fault of rags like the Daily Mail, Daily Express and all their poisonous, nasty, despicable little ilk who seem to routinely run stories on 'dole scroungers' and 'benefit cheats' and splash their Sunday papers with stories about mothers with four kids by four different fathers living off the tax-payers expense. How often do you see stories about people like DTMistress in the mainstream press? I imagine that people would have a pretty bloody different view on people on benefits if those stories got more coverage...

We have been on benefits on and off for the last 10 years. At the moment we are on benefits and likely to be on for the rest of my DH's life barring a major medical breakthrough. We are poor but not brassic because we finally had someone help us sort out our full entitlement.

When DS2 was 1 year old has to have been our worst time. I had nothing in the house so took the children (DS1 11yo, DD1 9yo DS2 1yo)to the neaby Pick Your Own and told them to eat as much as they could. I bought 20p worth of strawberries and gave DS them with some expressed milk made up with custard powder. They only had that that day, luckily it was 'pay' day next day.

DTmistress-maintenance isnt taken into account when they calculate working tax credits,as far as i'm aware.

thats why i would have been no better off working,cos xp has never paid any maintenance.according to the CSA he's unemployed

Tidytink, I think it's great what you are doing, looking ahead to what you want out of life and going for it, and I wish you lots of luck.

But you have answered the question at the end of your post yourself. "not all of us take advantage of the system".
Unfortunately enough people do to make (some - not all!) people suspicious and resentful whenever the word 'benefits' is mentioned. I don't think it's wrong to be angry at people who cheat the system (and they do exist), but as you say, it is wrong to tar everyone with the same brush. I think plenty of people realise that.

I think single mums who are living on benefits whilst looking after their children single-handed AND managing to do a degree or other education are heroes, quite frankly. I also think families who are living on benefits while the person who would otherwise be the wage earner is sick are probably having a tougher time than most of us can imagine and thank God that the system is there - there but for the grace of God etc.

What I do have a problem with, and I can't understand why there isn't more discussion about this, is the fathers who think it's their right to father a child and then just walk off leaving the mother to manage alone and reliant on the state. Why is it the mothers who get all the abuse when they're the ones doing all the work? It just doesn't make any sense.

Hear Hear Katy

Well, this thread has given me hope for humanity. Very glad to see people making the point about the real drains on our economy. Y'know it's not like you ever hear the government talking about looming economic crisis caused by people on benefits being too much of a drain on the public purse. Even when Thatcher had millions and millions out of work. but let a few bankers and City boys make some rash, ill thought out decisions and it's all going tits up, but you never hear people talking about "Corporate Scroungers". It makes me very, very

Fact is, keeping us squabbling amongst ourselves about the pittance that people on benefits receive serves both the government and big business very well. Keeps us occupied while they play silly buggers with stupendous quatities of public money.

i am so so glad now that benefiots get paid into bank accounts and not through those books. i used to hate going to the postoffice to get my money and hear the snidey comments from other customers.

I am looking at a getting a job soon, and cant wait. to have a little bit more (after paying rent and council tax i'm sure it wont be much left) but just want that little bit of independance back and for the little comments to stop. we do 'ok' on benefits mainly due to disability top ups, but it isnt an easy life really. ATM i am rearrnaging finances around to pay off the smaller debts first, and then work on the big uns that built up when dh was ill and in hospital. I am just glad he is well now and i can finally look at getting off benefits and giving a bit back. before dh fell ill 6 years ago, i worked full time plus overtime every week for 6years. and i am only 28 this year. I used to work my guts out doing 6am-3pm shifts in the coffee shop, go home, have dinner with dh, then go back to work to close down as there wasnt enough staff, and bne back home at 9pm just in time to see dh off for night shift.

no yanbu

there are some heartening comments on this thread

I'm so glad Expat has raised the point about Northern Rock. Did anyone watch the Dispatches program about how those greedy, amoral financiers hoodwinked the poorest in society to take out mortgages that they could not afford in the USA? I was absolutely disgusted that they got rich on the back of these people, many of whom have now lost their homes and are probably worse off than before.

Why don't folk rage about the parasites who prey on the vulnerable, gullible and financially naive members of society in order to line their own pockets and become even richer than they deserve?

And don't get me started about how little tax those vulgar parasites begrudgingly pay!

to the OP - i dont judge people, and well done you.

and to the poster talking about rich city types and non doms - the sweeping statement about them paying less tax than a cleaner - typical headline grabbing statement run by a newspaper - may be true in a few cases. But the money poured into the economy by non doms runs into billions (via VAT) and £300 million on stamp duty alone. There is a reason Darling has come under fire for his non dom policies. If the govt loses the substantial income from the non doms, then this economy and the government is in a world of trouble.

they contribute plenty to the british economy.

Well said Katy, my daughters sperm donor is living the high life and doesnt have a worry in the world while we struggle

A biblical quote, rehashed here.

A rich man who goes broke, rarely misses a meal. A poor man who goes broke can starve to death.

Well said Dal21, you are quite right about non-doms. I think most people are quite unaware of exactly how much money is poured into this country by foreigners living here.

And on the "Rich City types", don't forget that these people, and the businesses they work for, pay billions of pounds in tax every year, certainly a lot more tax than they ever see back from the system in services.

Now, I don't have a problem with this - I think it is right that we live in a society where the rich contribute more than those less able, but it drives me mad when people argue that they don't deserve what they are paid.

Don't forget that pay and bonuses are based on how much people bring in to the company, revenue on which the company pays corporation tax, a percentage of which taxed revenue is then paid to the employee who then pays 40% tax on that.

The Northern Rock thing is very galling. Guvmint wont pay decent benefits to those caring for disabled children or give us a heating allowance but they bail out some arses you were trying to get rich off poor people's backs.
I get tired deciding between heating and food. Dh had a great job earning a stonking £35K. He had to give it up to help care for dd. Carers Allowance being a whopping 17p an hour. If we dumped her in residential care it would cost tax payers £2k a WEEK.
When dd goes to school he can go back to work school hours (if his employers have waited) and we can get off benefits. Poor dh will then work 8.30 till 3 then cycle 5 miles home and start caring for dd until 8.30 the following morning.
I am disabled with MS in case anyone was wondering if I was spending all day eating bon-bons and watching daytime TV while DH slaved away
If there was decent respite care then dh could work full time and pay the taxes towards the help dd needs.
Sigh. Bloody Northern Rock/ MP's excessive expenses/Royal family air miles etc etc

I am a single parent and work in a professional job with quite a good salary but I am finding things hard because my rent is so high.

Looked on entitled to and it appears that I may qualify for housing benefit.

Whilst I don't relish the idea of claiming if it means I can maintain my DCs stability by remaining in this modest house I will.

Don't begrudge anyone who claims benefits - have only ever claimed once when I was u/e for three weeks.

Agree with everything expat says. Not nearly enough attention is given to the corporate scroungers esp those who don't pay salary and then it gets topped up by us.

Most big companies imo are out to shaft the ordinary person - major culprits are banks and financial institutions. The corporate veneer is sickening.

Also read that families are struggling due to food price rises and fuel.

Think the UK has become a very harsh society again (most things go full circle). Don't think it's the same in the rest of Europe.

Sorry meant pay a living salary/wage

I don't doubt that folk in the city generates huge amount of income and pay lots of tax.

Does not detract from the fact that many of them have also deliberately preyed on the weak and vulnerable in society via the sub-prime market in order to line their own pocket and they should be held to account for it.