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AIBU?

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Original poster

Is this acceptable? Should I ring child services?

87 replies

JasonMomoasnextgirlfriend · 14/05/2023 20:45

I’ve just found out that next weekend when he has our kids that my ex is planning on paying my 14 year old son to babysit his 11 year old sister whilst he buggers off to participate in a pole dancing competition (of all things)! I’m furious but I don’t know about whether other people would find this acceptable, or whether this is classed as neglect? Can anyone help?

OP posts:
Shadowworry · 14/05/2023 20:46

Your son can refuse - does he want to baby sit?

Sissynova · 14/05/2023 20:49

I think there’s a lot of variables here. Although I don’t think a 14 year old looking after their 11 year old sibling for a few hours is neglect.

webster1987 · 14/05/2023 20:49

First things first...ample dancing competition?!

piscesangel · 14/05/2023 20:49

What part of this do you think might be neglect? Genuine question.

Tigofigo · 14/05/2023 20:51

Is it for the entire weekend?

OrwellianTimes · 14/05/2023 20:52

I used to babysit for all the neighbours at 14. It’s still totally legal.

thirdfiddle · 14/05/2023 20:52

On the young end but 14 yr olds do do babysitting. As long as it's not overnight and 14 yr old can contact him if worried about anything I'd think it was okay.

riotlady · 14/05/2023 20:54

Can see why not everyone would be comfortable with it but definitely not social services worthy

ilovewispas · 14/05/2023 20:55

I babysat when I was 14. Think it depends on how sensible the child is.

Sapphire387 · 14/05/2023 20:56

How long will they be alone together for?

Lostinplaces · 14/05/2023 20:56

You’re being a bit ridiculous.

Temporaryanonymity · 14/05/2023 20:56

At 14 I babysat twice a week for a set of 3 year old twins. Earned a fortune too, at least, for a 14 year old!

bolgnees · 14/05/2023 20:56

Is the 11 year old in year 6 or year 7?

Clearly some year 7s are trusted to stay at home for a few hours when their parents are at work.

BirbFriend · 14/05/2023 20:57

I babysat when I was 14, for toddlers!

Surely if it's only for a few hours over the evening it's fine?

user1473878824 · 14/05/2023 20:57

Oh should he take them with him instead?

Nina9870 · 14/05/2023 20:59

To participate?! Is your ex husband a pole dancer??
sorry, I digress! Nah I wouldn’t be happy with it, however I don’t think it’s illegal

AndTheSurveySays · 14/05/2023 21:00

A 14 year old should be more than capable of minding an 11 year old for few hours.

SaturdayGiraffe · 14/05/2023 21:02

I suppose it’s better than taking them to the pole dancing competition.

DistrictCommissioner · 14/05/2023 21:03

How long for? I leave my 14 year old minding the 11 and 7 year olds.

EasterBreak · 14/05/2023 21:05

I babysat 2 young kids all night at 14 and got paid for it.

EasterBreak · 14/05/2023 21:07

It's not neglect op no.

mynameiscalypso · 14/05/2023 21:08

The 14 year old and the 11 year old are siblings right? I would have happily looked after my younger brother when we were that age (and would have been delighted to have been paid!)

weareallout · 14/05/2023 21:08

At 14 I used to babysit young kids for whole weekends. My parents were no same estate but no mobile and a good 8 min walk.
14 & 11 staying home alone for an eve etc is pretty normal.

HairyKitty · 14/05/2023 21:08

What he’s doing is totally not relevant.
What matters is whether your 14 year old is a suitable babysitter for however long it is he’s going out.

PathOfLeastResitance · 14/05/2023 21:09

Good luck to your ex in the competition and I think this is fine for a 14 year old to do.