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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Should I report benefit fraud?

181 replies

Greeksummer · 14/05/2023 18:49

Firstly, this isn’t a benefit bashing thread. It’s something I feel hugely conflicted about.

A couple I know is committing benefit fraud and have been for quite a few years. They live together with their school aged child however, the dad is not actually down as being at the address so their rent is paid for as the mum works part time, as well as single persons council tax discount. The dad earns a very good salary (not 6 figures but for where we live in the UK it’s a lot of money) so there’s absolutely no excuse for it. I know the mum better than the dad and she’s quite open about it all and money in general. Both of their parents’ help them out as well - regularly buying their weekly food shop, covering the costs of their child’s school uniform every year, school trips etc (no issue with parent’s helping out if they’re able to, I’m just highlighting that they’re in no way struggling financially).

It just makes me so cross as I know a disabled person who’s benefits were stopped as they were deemed not disabled enough and had a horrendous ordeal trying to get them back. I think it’s so wrong that they’re taking money they’re not entitled to and don’t need when so many people are struggling. However, I’m also aware that it’s a drop in the ocean compared to what millionaires and billionaires get away with hence why I’m conflicted as to whether I should report it or not.

YABU - keep your nose out, people get away with much worse

YANBU - it’s wrong and you should report it

OP posts:
ilovesooty · 14/05/2023 19:52

YukoandHiro · 14/05/2023 19:48

I wouldn't report it because it's very unlikely to be true. If the family help with food shops I suspect the guy doesn't earn anything much at all but is a Walter Mitty fantasist type.

I imagine that's a possibility The OP only knows what the woman has told her, which may or may not be true.

I wonder how many who are firmly on the side of reporting would have the guts to tell the person they thought was claiming fraudulently that they planned to report them?

Irridescantshimmmer · 14/05/2023 19:52

YANBU

Conkersinautumn · 14/05/2023 19:56

You say they're not financially struggling but thar their parents are regularly buying them food. You've got to be very stretched if you need your parents to be subbing groceries when you're in your own home

AAAAABBBBBCCCCC · 14/05/2023 19:59

If I was going to report, I couldn't stay friendly as I can't be two faced.

MoggyMittens23 · 14/05/2023 19:59

drpet49 · 14/05/2023 19:15

I agree. Though MN seem to love benefit cheats for some bizarre, messed up reason.

Show quote history

It's weird. 'None of your business, keep your nose out' erm....we are literally paying for it, how is it not our business?

KarmaStar · 14/05/2023 20:01

Report without a doubt.these people and the scum like them are the reason why there's not enough money in the system .

GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER · 14/05/2023 20:01

I would, OP.

@drpet49 , TBH I often think that some of the posters who are so keen to say, Keep your nose out! What’s it to you? etc. are very likely on the fiddle themselves.

Swrigh1234 · 14/05/2023 20:02

Greeksummer · 14/05/2023 19:40

I posted here as it’s not exactly an easy conversation to have in real life. I haven’t seen anyone frothing.

I think keeping my distance is the way to go.

So you’ve bee browbeaten into not reporting by the fraud sympathisers.

Swrigh1234 · 14/05/2023 20:03

GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER · 14/05/2023 20:01

I would, OP.

@drpet49 , TBH I often think that some of the posters who are so keen to say, Keep your nose out! What’s it to you? etc. are very likely on the fiddle themselves.

Too right.

Paperlate · 14/05/2023 20:03

KarmaStar · 14/05/2023 20:01

Report without a doubt.these people and the scum like them are the reason why there's not enough money in the system .

You really think it's that simple?

ilovesooty · 14/05/2023 20:04

GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER · 14/05/2023 20:01

I would, OP.

@drpet49 , TBH I often think that some of the posters who are so keen to say, Keep your nose out! What’s it to you? etc. are very likely on the fiddle themselves.

Oh, another one making a big assumption without any real basis.

ilovesooty · 14/05/2023 20:05

Swrigh1234 · 14/05/2023 20:02

So you’ve bee browbeaten into not reporting by the fraud sympathisers.

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Another big assumption - on more than one count.

Paperlate · 14/05/2023 20:05

I reckon the REPORT them posters are the ones who maliciously report anyone who they don't like. Just for spite.

Crimeismymiddlename · 14/05/2023 20:07

I often toy with reporting two separate people, one who I know evades tax, and another who cheats benefits. I haven’t and I don’t really know what’s stopping me. I know the small amounts are a drop compared with the multi national corps, however these benefits are tax payers money so should not be misused.
The person who I think is committing benefit fraud’s partner has been investigated multiple times due to tip offs-they are not well liked and honestly if your friend is loud about the fraud somebody who dislikes them will make the report eventually.

Proudofitbabe · 14/05/2023 20:07

If true that's scum city and certainly deserves to be reported - BUT just in case all it isn't as it seems I'd keep out of it.

Sometimeswinning · 14/05/2023 20:08

ilovesooty · 14/05/2023 20:04

Oh, another one making a big assumption without any real basis.

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Anyone who tells you to ignore benefit fraud has a reason to do it. I don't commit benefit fraud so I find it so bloody annoying that all my taxes increase to support people who take advantage of our shit system.

I'd report away. I'd stay friends because it would be a tad dodgy if I suddenly distanced myself. I'm good with that aswell!

Mangogogogo · 14/05/2023 20:09

To be honest I’m not sure what I can do but my first thought was like pp, are they really earning what they say? One of my friends constantly went on about how much her husband made. It eventually went from ‘he earns 4K a month’ to ‘£1200 a month’

IWasFunBeforeMum · 14/05/2023 20:09

I would.

JudgeRudy · 14/05/2023 20:09

I'd report them. For thosesaying it's not your business it is. It's everyones. This isn't a single mum earning £20 cash cleaning one morning a week. That's piss taking

Babyroobs · 14/05/2023 20:10

GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER · 14/05/2023 20:01

I would, OP.

@drpet49 , TBH I often think that some of the posters who are so keen to say, Keep your nose out! What’s it to you? etc. are very likely on the fiddle themselves.

Exactly this, there are way too many of them around.

ilovesooty · 14/05/2023 20:11

Sometimeswinning · 14/05/2023 20:08

Anyone who tells you to ignore benefit fraud has a reason to do it. I don't commit benefit fraud so I find it so bloody annoying that all my taxes increase to support people who take advantage of our shit system.

I'd report away. I'd stay friends because it would be a tad dodgy if I suddenly distanced myself. I'm good with that aswell!

Show quote history

Good with behaving like a hypocrite then.

Original poster
Greeksummer · 14/05/2023 20:12

The dad definitely makes a lot of money and they’re definitely not struggling. They have 2 very nice cars, go on holidays, they’re always redecorating etc. Their parents’ help out because they can and want to not because they need to. Like I said, if I thought there was even the slightest possibility that they were struggling, I wouldn’t have an issue and I wouldn’t have started this thread.

I find it galling because it’s just so unnecessary, and the bragging just compounds it.

OP posts:
whatisgoingonintheworld · 14/05/2023 20:14

The point is @Greeksummer every pound that someone who is not entitled to it receives takes money from the vulnerable people that need it.

Some on MN will have you believe that reporting a person stealing (because that is what it is) is actually worse than the actual stealing. Ignore them and put the facts down, report and then forget about it. If they are stealing they will be investigated if you have enough facts that can be checked.

ArcticSkewer · 14/05/2023 20:15

It's not like anything will happen, so go ahead and report.
Unless they are very stupid, he will have an alternative address that she can give as his address.

LaDamaDeElche · 14/05/2023 20:15

Mind your own business.