Is this normal for a hen do?

[Worthyoflove]

My friend is getting married.

Hen do is in June and hosted at home as there will quite a few pregnant women and breastfeeding so a night out drinking is off the table. Instead will be games in the garden and a bbq and they’re asking for £25 a head. There will be atleast 10-20people there so not a small amount of cash.

Is this normal these days? It’s really put me off going. I’d rather bring some food to the bbq (I could do the whole lot for less than £50!)

Did they specify the per head cost before they knew how many people were coming? Have they said what will happen to any unspent money?

It's cheap for a hen do but the organiser(s) shouldn't be profiteering in any way from it.

I've just spent about £500 on a hen weekend ... probably actually more to be honest ... just enjoy the fun

Not at all and if I chose to have a party I would pay for it all but a hen party is different. It is not normally the hosts party and something that is being provided for the bride. I have no idea who’s organizing this but if it’s a bridesmaid then why should they pick up a several hundred expense when other people pay nothing just because it is at their house.

Hen 'dos' are quite stratified, aren't they? Same with 'baby showers'.

Only a certain class of people are into this stuff.

Probably because you always have that one guest trying not to point fingers at the OP who rocks up with a pack of crisps and a bottle of blossom hill wine as their contribution whilst eating everyone else’s food and drinking all the good wine first.

But a normal hen do would usually be a night out and you can't have a good night with less than £50 these days. I'd say £25 for some food and an evening with friends is a bargain

It doesn’t sound like a bridal shower at all. A bridal shower is an event centred around gifts where the bride’s family and friends ‘shower’ her with gifts. American and very uncommon in the uk.

Considering OP is balking at the cost of £25 for a hen I imagine she’s not also bringing a gift.

Many hens are not centred around shots and willies in sticky nightclubs.

Hey not fair! She would also bring half a pack of Richmond sausages that she had left over from breakfast.

What would it cost you if you did have a night out on the town?
Taxis, drinks, food, etc? I doubt you'd get much change back from £25, if you did, i'm sure there'd be a few PP's that would like to know which area you live in, so they'd know where they could have a very cheap night out.

No I don’t think only a certain class of people are into a hen. It’s a very judgemental and narrow minded view.
I would say as a concept probably 9/10 women getting married have a hen of sorts.

I don’t know a single person, other than one person who eloped, who didn’t have a hen and that ranges from people who dropped out of school at 14 pregnant, started working in a shop full time at 16, through to top financial lawyers having a 150k from the bank of daddy.

You're mixing with your own, though. I'm talking actually having class not money 😂

A hen do at home for £25 including food & drink and back home at a decent time for my own bed ?
We need to swop friends !

Says the person who thinks a hot dog is all that is needed to throw a party.

Sounds fab to me. If you don't know exactly what the organisers are planning, why not give them the benefit of the doubt for now and assume they're spending the budget on lovely food, nice drinks, decorations and activities to make it special for the bride. I organised a garden hen do for 8 people during lockdown and we had a hot tub, gazebo, silent disco, decorations, food, crafts, cocktails and food. It cost a lot more than £25 per head!

If you get there and it's a couple of dodgy hotdogs and not much else, then you're free to think them cheeky fuckers. But even then at least it's only £25.

Is it "classy" to sneer at a "certain class of people"?

I've just spent around £700 on my sisters Hen do. That was just for me as it was abroad. £25 each is a steal!

No she’s not an adult, all of us with girls age 8+ have been invited to bring them along.

After reading all your responses, I can fully accept that I was BU and I’ll pay the £50 without complaint. 😁

£25 doesn’t sound bad tbh. If the hen do was at a restaurant or bar, how much would you expect to spend on food/drinks/travel?

I find organising anything like this as a host you end up more out of pocket than anyone. You always go over budget and do not like to ask people for more money so you land the higher bill

@IsThereAnEchoInHere seriously? Your comment is the strange thing.

Tbh you're getting off hugely cheaply when you think that some poor people wind up spending hundreds or thousands.

I think then charging £25 for 8 year olds is wrong.

The cost of most of it should be shared amongst the adults, the brides friends. With then an extra charge (say £10) per kid fir food.

I wouldn’t pay to go to someone’s garden

mid just say thank you. But can’t really afford it. A couple would be £50! And I certainly couldn’t afford that right now.

I'm not sure why you'd pay £25 for a child aged 8, my 7 year old would literally nibble a bit of pasta salad and drink cordial, I'd struggle to see where the money has gone if half the guests are children. Sounds like a terrible hen do having all your kids there, are the blokes going to have an actual night out whilst you are lumbered with the kids? £25 is dirt cheap for a hen party yes, but this sounds more like a overpriced bbq, surely if you are going around someone's house the host should pay? I couldn't imagine being charged to attend a bbq at a friend's, bring a dish would work better here.

If you get copious alcohol all night I’d say no problem . Pay the 25 quid .