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Original poster

Should I buy this Engagement Ring

153 replies

TheRussiansAreComing · 12/05/2023 13:18

I need the advise of MN please. Looking to ask my partner to marry me and would like to know if I’m on the right track with what I am thinking of choosing. I’m thinking of a white gold or platinum pave band with a 3 carat Emerald cut lab grown diamond.
Is a lab grown diamond ok, or is this cheap?
Will 3 carat look too big to be believable?
is Pave popular?

She has recently started to wear her late DM’s wedding ring which is a plain ish gold band.
Will it matter if it’s next to white gold / platinum.
OH is over 50, with a younger contemporary taste.
If she didn’t already have a gold band, I think white gold would be her preference.
I think she would prefer a solitaire over a cluster.
Does anyone have experience of purchasing from 77 Diamonds?

Should I buy this Engagement Ring
Should I buy this Engagement Ring
Should I buy this Engagement Ring
OP posts:
MysteryBelle · 12/05/2023 15:38

Lillyrosemay · 12/05/2023 15:29

Also have you considered an antique ring, there are some absolutely gorgeous and unique ones available and the prices are great.

https://friarhouse.com/collections/art-deco-diamond-engagement-rings?page=1

I’m also the same demographic as your partner and would be horrified if my husband fronted up with a tacky 3 carat lab diamond ring.

but if he fronted up with something like this I’d be overjoyed (get this one is over budget though)

https://friarhouse.com/products/3023

Those are gorgeous!

ErrolTheDragon · 12/05/2023 15:42

Is this a thing?

Of course it's 'a thing', has been for decades. I'm 60, we chose my ring together when we were about 22.

Shhhquirrel · 12/05/2023 15:43

Likethestarsabove547 · 12/05/2023 13:25

You've put an awful amount of thought into it but I think some PP are right, go for a cheaper ring for proposal and pick together. Some rings from Pandora are lovely and would suit this idea, best of luck

Best of both worlds. The excitement of the proposal and then a fabulous day choosing a ring together. Good luck.

theemmadilemma · 12/05/2023 15:44

Going to chime in and say unless she's shown you examples of the ring of her dreams and that's it. Like really it, I'd go placeholder and let her choose.

It's so personal. Not every girls dreams are the same. And getting stuck with something that just isn't YOU is fucking awful for everyone involved.

At over 50, she'll get it, and she'll thank you for it.

billy1966 · 12/05/2023 15:47

Allow her to make her own choice.

I believe it to be the height of presumptuousness to think that anyone would choose a ring for a woman.

I certainly wouldn't have ever been impressed with it.

My finger, my choice, thank! 😁

billy1966 · 12/05/2023 15:48

Shhhquirrel · 12/05/2023 15:43

Best of both worlds. The excitement of the proposal and then a fabulous day choosing a ring together. Good luck.

Show quote history

Perfect idea.

Banditdog · 12/05/2023 15:48

PinkPink1 · 12/05/2023 15:33

Is this a thing? I’m in my mid-20s and my fiancé proposed to me with a ring he had bought. He knew my ring size and had a good idea of what I would like - even though I never showed him ring pictures! It’s perfect.

Show quote history

Of course it is a thing, doesn’t the fact that the vast majority of posters have said so suggest that it is a thing to you?

JoanThursday1972 · 12/05/2023 15:51

HermioneWeasley · 12/05/2023 13:23

I would definitely take her to choose it

nothing wrong with lab grown - good quality and no ethical issues

pave bands are a PITA - I know so many women paying £50 a go when the stones fall out

£75 I paid for one tiny stone I could hardly see!

CosimoPiovasco · 12/05/2023 15:51

love the cut, very deco
Dont like that it sticks out so much at the sides. It will be difficult to wear with a wedding ring next to it.
Dont like lab grown diamonds. I would want a real one.
Ideally ask your partner what she would like. If you really want to give her something at the ‘big propose moment’ use a toy ring/ crisp onion ring 🤣 ( if she’s got a sense of humour ). My dh did this.

Youdoyoubabe · 12/05/2023 15:52

It is gorgeous! I'll marry you!

Banditdog · 12/05/2023 15:52

MysteryBelle · 12/05/2023 15:15

Most women prefer a real diamond, not a gaudy 3 carat fake diamond, or 1 carat fake diamond masquerading as a real diamond, and they prefer to help choose it. Some women might like lab produced but most do not.

You would do well to listen to the overwhelming majority of women here.

😂. That is what I was thinking but didn’t dare say.

OP actually has a fair budget and would probably get a nice 0.75-0.9 carat natural diamond depending on the other ccc.

Pipsquiggle · 12/05/2023 15:53

Well done for asking for advice.

As others have said, I would definitely get a placeholder ring then choose together.

I personally don't like the ring you've put in your first post, however, that's me.

No issue with lab grown diamonds.

If you like a rectangular diamond but want more sparkle than an emerald cut, check out radiant cut diamonds - they're my favourite!

CosimoPiovasco · 12/05/2023 15:55

Youdoyoubabe · 12/05/2023 15:52

It is gorgeous! I'll marry you!

🤣🤣🤣🤣
I just love the fact that he’s asking on MN….that alone surely makes him good marriage material.

GonnaGetGoingReturns · 12/05/2023 15:56

If it were me I wouldn’t like it, neither the cut or size of the ring and don’t like pave settings either.

Back in early 1990 when I was engaged I had (still have it) a natural emerald and diamond cluster yellow gold which was a very pretty ring, common style for the time and also my style but fairly expensive for the time. My fiancé preferred emeralds when my birthstone is sapphires. He also bought it in Victoria, Canada as he was Canadian and we were living partly there and partly in London so I didn’t feel I could change it. Blingy single diamonds weren’t trendy then.

Now, I’d probably go diamonds and sapphires, and platinum modern style ring, preferably art deco style.

I don’t like huge blingy diamonds but do like huge blingy sapphires! 🫣

Let her choose her ring with you.

Xmasbaby11 · 12/05/2023 15:57

Agree with PP, far better to let her choose. You could choose a beautiful ring and it might not be for her, the colour, diamond, shape, way it sits on her finger. It's so personal, and trying on rings and choosing one is really exciting and fun!

MysteryBelle · 12/05/2023 15:57

Fake diamonds and fake gemstones are an easy way for companies to make maximum dollars for minimum effort. But a crucial reason these companies backed by their owners do it is to eventually make real diamonds exclusive so that only the very rich can access and own real diamonds and real precious gemstones. That’s why fake diamonds and gemstones are marketed to the masses. Cheap, and reserves the real stuff for the new “gentry” or even royalty, in their eyes.

FoxCorner · 12/05/2023 16:00

Xmasbaby11 · 12/05/2023 15:57

Agree with PP, far better to let her choose. You could choose a beautiful ring and it might not be for her, the colour, diamond, shape, way it sits on her finger. It's so personal, and trying on rings and choosing one is really exciting and fun!

Agree with this. Glad I got to choose one that was perfect for me

ErrolTheDragon · 12/05/2023 16:01

Lots of women here are saying they'd prefer a lab grown diamond to a mined one nowadays. You can't be 100% sure of the provenance of the latter. Lab diamonds aren't 'fake' - they're not like cubic zirconia or irradiated coloured stones.

Bluebellsbells · 12/05/2023 16:06

I have a 4 carat ring in total, where the biggest stone is 2 carats and it feels enough! I definitely wouldn't like a bigger stone, it stand's really talk from the rest and took me a while to get used to it.

So I'd advise against a 3 carat.

GonnaGetGoingReturns · 12/05/2023 16:08

billy1966 · 12/05/2023 15:47

Allow her to make her own choice.

I believe it to be the height of presumptuousness to think that anyone would choose a ring for a woman.

I certainly wouldn't have ever been impressed with it.

My finger, my choice, thank! 😁

I always thought the same about my engagement ring but back in 1990 when I got engaged we talked about it and styles but as it was still very much men proposing etc, he spoke to his DM in Canada (he was a private but from a well off family) and apparently a few of his friends back home who were engaged also showed their rings to their moms who then showed them to his DM, so me, living in London, still studying but living with him when he was on leave, I felt like I didn’t have a huge amount of choice, as he was paying for the ring… he paid more in the end apparently than I thought he would!

Lemonademoney · 12/05/2023 16:12

I would let her choose. I’ve been married for twenty years but if I were getting engaged now I would definitely go for a vintage ring, better value and might sit better with the ring she already has?

Rainydaysgetmedown · 12/05/2023 16:17

I’ll happily accept it, it’s my perfect ring. Shall I marry you?

Fighterofthenightman1 · 12/05/2023 16:17

I personally feel the colour and clarity are more important than the size of the diamond. I think it's better to have a smaller higher quality diamond rather than a big one filled with imperfections and a slight yellow tone. I think a lot of people focus too much on how big the diamond is. Also, I love oval cut

That's my ramble over...

toomuchlaundry · 12/05/2023 16:23

I chose my ring with DH, wouldn't have wanted it any other way