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Original poster

Should I buy this Engagement Ring

153 replies

TheRussiansAreComing · 12/05/2023 13:18

I need the advise of MN please. Looking to ask my partner to marry me and would like to know if I’m on the right track with what I am thinking of choosing. I’m thinking of a white gold or platinum pave band with a 3 carat Emerald cut lab grown diamond.
Is a lab grown diamond ok, or is this cheap?
Will 3 carat look too big to be believable?
is Pave popular?

She has recently started to wear her late DM’s wedding ring which is a plain ish gold band.
Will it matter if it’s next to white gold / platinum.
OH is over 50, with a younger contemporary taste.
If she didn’t already have a gold band, I think white gold would be her preference.
I think she would prefer a solitaire over a cluster.
Does anyone have experience of purchasing from 77 Diamonds?

Should I buy this Engagement Ring
Should I buy this Engagement Ring
Should I buy this Engagement Ring
OP posts:
JaninaDuszejko · 12/05/2023 13:40

Don't waste your money on a cheap ring. Have a discussion (not a proposal) about getting married then go shopping for a ring the next day. She might want an antique or to reuse some family jewellery or not like the idea of a lab grown diamond (some don't but they are much more ethical).

Hazelnuttella · 12/05/2023 13:41

Just to illustrate the point that it’s a highly personal decision, I’m in my mid 30s, love the emerald shape but don’t like the starkness of the narrow band with no shoulders.

Margarita45 · 12/05/2023 13:42

3ct is massive. I’d go smaller and opt for better clarity and colour. Big diamonds with lesser sparkle can be assumed fake/replica imo.

Rinkydinkydoodle · 12/05/2023 13:43

As above, it’s a lot to spend for something she’ll have to wear forever and that may just be slightly off. So by all means tell her you’ve made an appointment to have a look at some designs, but just so you don’t go down one knee empty-handed …

https://jellybuttonjewellery.bigcartel.com/product/marry-me-love-heart-ring

Marry Me Love Heart Ring

Clay charm made from a mould of an actual love heart sweet. Cast in clay, ink treated and glazed. Perfect and adorable way to pop that special...

https://jellybuttonjewellery.bigcartel.com/product/marry-me-love-heart-ring

KvotheTheBloodless · 12/05/2023 13:46

Don't worry about lab-grown diamonds, they are physically identical to 'found' diamonds in every way!

I agree that a placeholder ring would be best unless you are very sure of your DP's taste. I'm super clumsy so wouldn't have been able to wear a solitaire (I'd be forever banging it on things and scratching my own face) so make sure you also consider her hobbies etc. If she's often to be found mucking out horses or doing martial arts, a flat setting would be best.

Greenfree · 12/05/2023 13:46

I wouldn't pay that much for lab grown diamonds. You'll be able to take her shopping and let her choose a lovely ring with that kind of budget plus you get the special treatment in the jewellery shops. I would propose with a different piece of jewellery and make it clear your taking her shopping

Lillyrosemay · 12/05/2023 13:47

Let her pick her own, honestly unless you’re loaded then no one is going to believe she’s got 40 grands worth of Diamond on her finger. So if yoire going for believable, this wouldn’t be it.

personally I’d be embarrassed to wear something so ostentatious and obviously lab grown.

PolkadotsAndMoonbeams · 12/05/2023 13:48

I don't think I'd go for an emerald cut diamond to be honest, I'd like it to sparkle more. Emeralds tend to be cut like that because they're more fragile and there's more risk of breaking them if you try something like a brilliant cut.

Diamonds are so hard they can be safely cut in ways that make them sparkle more.

greenspaces4peace · 12/05/2023 13:48

From a jewelry perspective, the diamonds all around the band are prone to falling out and can interfere with sizing, the many many claws can snag clothing and hair. its a pretty design and not practical, is she working in an industry where she will wear it all the time or will she be removing it regularly? will she be prepping meals with it?
3 C, depending on her bone structure (petite vs heavier set) might not suit her hand.
I wouldn’t say it’s classic enough to be a safe bet.

Original poster
TheRussiansAreComing · 12/05/2023 13:49

@Margarita45
You might be right on the size. Just showed a colleague who put a ruler on her finger, and said that’s too big. Might go to a 1 or 2 ct.

I think I’m OK with the colour and clarity as I’ve gone to the higher end, without going quite too perfect. I can’t afford perfect

OP posts:
sheworemellowyellow · 12/05/2023 13:49

My DH proposed with a twist of wire so that I could choose my own ring.

Honestly? I love that twist of wire more than my actual ring. Obviously I don't wear it, it's in the safe with our valuable. It's very, very dear to me.

goinginsaneinthemembrane · 12/05/2023 13:50

Is a lab grown diamond ok, or is this cheap?

Better than blood diamonds

Tandora · 12/05/2023 13:50

Lab grown diamonds are more
ethical. Nothing “cheap” about it!

Original poster
TheRussiansAreComing · 12/05/2023 13:50

@Rinkydinkydoodle
I love this idea. Could be the way to go. How could she refuse 😂

OP posts:
MiIIiex · 12/05/2023 13:51

I'm not really understanding everyone saying she should choose her own. I was delighted with what my husband picked and I loved that he picked it. I'd have loved whatever it was because he chose it.

It's a beautiful ring.

ttacticall · 12/05/2023 13:53

Well done for putting so much thought into choosing the ring.
It's gorgeous but not everyone would be happy with lab grown. Agree, she needs to be able to choose. She might prefer something smaller but real.

Original poster
TheRussiansAreComing · 12/05/2023 13:53

@PolkadotsAndMoonbeams
Thanks for that advise. Are you suggesting the Emerald cut may not sparkle as much. The sparkle factor would sway me to choose a different shape if necessary.

OP posts:
Dixiechickonhols · 12/05/2023 13:54

I’m late 40s and to be honest it’s not my taste. I’d go with let her choose. Maybe plan an overnight somewhere like York and you can browse all the little jewellery shops.

Tigofigo · 12/05/2023 13:55

I wouldn't wear that ring personally, totally not my style. I think it's a big risk to take.

Some people are superstitious about wearing silver and gold together too.

LadyPoison · 12/05/2023 13:55

Buy a nice but cheap ring to propose with then make an occasion of going out to buy the engagement ring together followed by a nice restaurant.

You risk spending a lot of money on a ring she may not like and it would be a shame to have it stay in a box (where to be honest most of the jewellery DH has bought me lies).

Lab diamonds are "real" diamonds and generally acceptable nowadays but that ring is going to be very bling and if that is not her taste you'll be wasting your money.

Original poster
TheRussiansAreComing · 12/05/2023 13:56

@greenspaces4peace
Thanks for the advice. I’m now thinking of going with a plain band. Based on other comments I might drop to a 1 or 2 ct and also change the cut.

OP posts:
Banditdog · 12/05/2023 13:57

I am over 50 and I do not like that ring at all, it is too big and too square for my taste. Also I have no idea of what a lab grown diamond is but 3 carats of it is certainly a fraction of the cost of a 3c of a “regular” diamond.

I am very much in the camp of letting her choose her own ring, she has to wear a it every day for the rest of her life. We enjoyed shopping for my ring together and also got an interesting education on diamonds in the process.

UndercoverCop · 12/05/2023 13:58

Do you have any pictures of jewellery she loves and wears? That ring isn't to my taste, but I couldn't possibly say if she would like it without having some ideas of her style/preferences

saltinesandcoffeecups · 12/05/2023 13:59

What does her other jewelry look like (besides the plain band which she didn’t pick out)?

Personally I wouldn’t want a lab grown diamond. If it’s down to price I’d go for a smaller real diamond.