To think that allowing young children to "play out" is a safeguarding concern?

[LongTimeLurker234]

Was just wondering how people feel about children between the ages of say, 6/7/8/9 "playing out" unsupervised by adults for hours, and without a phone. Going to the local parks, shops etc... Are there any laws about it?

I'm posting this because I'm actually concerned for some children, not just because of this issue alone but this is part of it.

YABU- playing out is normal
YANBU - safeguarding concern

Same. My mum used to let us play out in the local area when I was really young. I was approached by 2 men before I turned 5. One asked me to pick a coin up from the floor and pass it to him in his car - I did and he was just casually sat there, with his nob out Another time a man asked me to play hide and seek with him, luckily a neighbour seen and went to get my DM. Those are 2 incidents which stick in my mind but there's been many other 'minor' incidents.

It's shit that kids freedoms have to be curtailed because of perverted men. Perhaps we should let kids out and keep men in?!

(I know, I know....NAMALT blah blah!)

I’m on the fence. I think we’ve lost something very important shuttling our dc between school, activities and play dates. It was probably healthier and safer when mixed age play with minimal adult supervision took place outdoors instead of online.

But did I let my 6 year olds roam free - heck no.

I wish people could see the irony of our culture allowing paedophiles/ dangerous men access to our kids online in such vast numbers - while frothing at the mouth if an 8 year old is playing in a park without their parent.

And yet... your freedom gave you the experience to see his behaviour and be suspicious of it... But you are denying your own children the opportunity to trust their instincts? Can't you see the path that leads down?

Bad people exist, they always have, they always will. Shielding your children doesn't help them in the long run.

It’s not normal where I live but a few miles down the road you see it. I think it’s dangerous but it’s not something that would meet threshold on its own for any kind of social service intervention

You do know OP that it's rare for a child to be abducted and harmed by a stranger. Children are more at risk of abuse in their own homes. Look at the recent cases of children being killed by parents/step parents.

Completely agree.

Not to mention internet grooming etc.

But the park is dangerous 🙄

I sometimes think parents have no idea what is happening when kids are out. I was driving my car, 20mph carefully, and a kid of about 9yo came found the bend completely on the wrong side of the road on his bike. Now I stopped dead, so as not to kill him, but how is his mum/dad going to know that he has no idea about road safety? They just think he “played out” happily and successfully on his bike, salt of the earth type behaviour. When in fact he was a very serious danger to himself and others. What if it had been someone driving faster?

I saw some other kids maybe 13-15 who were actually throwing a mobile phone about and fighting over it. Even my bloody dog was horrified and growled at them for it.

we don’t live in utopia. I was out as a child with my best friend and we had to sprint from a park as there was a man watching us from inside the bushes.

@waterrat absolutely bang on- couldn't have put it better!

I have no issues with children "playing out" and my children certainly did it. But there are circumstances in your post which would concern me.

Age - I think 6 is far too young - 9/10+ is a more appropriate age
Lack of supervision for hours - again, generally in my experience playing out was controlled - for a specified shortish (say 30m-1hr) period of time, and children were expected to check in. Usually they had phones too.
Roaming far and wide - Finally, I'd expect parents to be aware of where their children are. So walking to the park, playing for 30 mins, walking back - fine. Going for a bike ride round a pre-agreed route - fine, but wandering aimlessly here and there, with no adult knowing where they are - not fine at all.

So what you are describing doesn't sound good to me, but equally, it doesn't sound like typical "playing out" in the area where I live.

Those are quite a wide age ranges. A 6 year old I would expect to be supervised, maybe not constantly but with someone fairly close by and checking in regularly. However a 9 year old going off to the park for a while doesn’t seem like a big issue to me.

If you have concerns for the children in generally I would sit down and maybe try to write and hone in on what it is that is concerning you. What have you seen/heard that causes to be worried? Obviously children playing in and of itself is probably fairly low risk, unless you live near a busy road etc. However as a single issue as part of a wider neglectful situation it might be more worrying. Context is important here.

you can call childlike and talk through your concerns with them. That I think would be a good course of action. However of course if you are ever concerned for the children’s immediate safety then call 999.

Totally normal where I live and I'm really pleased about it - the kids love it and they all look really happy. Everyone looks out for each other and knows each other too.

It depends enormously on place (street/traffic etc) and age.

In your OP you say 6/7/8/9
But there is a world of difference between 6 and 9.

6 is too young. At 9 mine were playing out in our street with other neighbours children. Cul de sac and lots of other kids out playing.
We have a library at the end of our road and mine were allowed to go to the library on their own from about age 7/8. Always with a time to be home, and limiting the time they were out. Also strict boundaries, and if they broke those they got grounded and we started again with trust.

I work in safeguarding and I would be concerned if:

1. it was for long periods of time.
2. No adult checked in with them at all. (on our street mums popped in and out to check on kids)
3. the children were 6/7 end of the age range
4. the context - busy road, no other kids playing
5. they are not in their own street but further away.
6. it is later in the evening (after 6?) or dark.

and so on.

milkshake - Exactly, it amazes me how many parents let their children have unsupervised access to the internet at a young age.

Perfectly normal where I live. But there are only quiet residential streets between our estate and the local play park. Most of the locals know each other and whose children are whose - and everyone knows where the convicted paedophiles live. The children are generally in mixed age groups.

If you live near a busy main road or somewhere where gang culture is rife then I'd say that's a different matter. But parents can judge that.

I'm mid 50s and I remember being about 5, my brother would have been 8, we used to get the bus to an open air swimming pool in the next town and spend the day there with a packed lunch, bus back in time for dinner. Seems mad now!

Ah I don't think I should have done this as I'm not willing to provide any context on a public forum.

For the people rolling their eyes I wouldn't have posted this if the playing out was my only concern. And I asked about laws because I'm wondering if it would be taken into consideration as part of a bigger picture. Obviously I know there's not a law against a child going to a shop.

*you can call childlike and talk through your concerns with them.

Please don’t call Childline for something like this, it’s a service for children and young people, adults calling for stuff like this stops children being able to speak. The NSPCC helpline is the right service for this kind of thing.

Unless there’s something else concerning you, I don’t think children playing out in and of itself is particularly a safeguarding issue. As a CP social worker I literally wouldn’t give it a second thought unless there was much more to it eg parents absent from home for hours, or significantly under the influence etc.

Mine play out with the neighbours kids, but we're in a cul-de-sac and there's always eyes on them from one of the houses.

Plenty are not.

I think 6/7 is always too young, but 8/9 could be ok depending on the area and the children involved etc etc. I'm in a village where most people know or at last recognise local children and keep a general eye out for each other so fairly optimal conditions, but mine didn't play, out eg away from our road, until age 10 in their last year of primary.

I do wish I lived in an area where this was possible, but our road is a bit to full of cars sadly.

Where I live the kids play out in the street. They tend to stay in front of one of the parents' houses and always move to the pavement if they see / hear a car. Nobody is driving fast because it is a tiny cul-de-sac. You occasionally see them walk to the patch of grass around the corner (about 2 mins walk) to play football. I think it is lovely that they play together and like hearing them laughing. They aren't 6yo though, more like 8 / 9, and they are well behaved kids (eg polite when speaking to adults, never swearing, rarely roughhousing).

OP - If you have genuine concerns for a child's safety then you need to report it to the appropriate services. Nobody here can advise you if you are vague and don't want to give any more information.

go back and read the post from someone who works in social services. This would be a concern as part of a bigger picture for a family.