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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Finders keepers?

243 replies

AldiBag4Life · 30/04/2023 21:31

My DD18 told me last week she found an item of jewellery in a grass verge randomly one day when she was out walking to work - 6 months ago.

I recently complemented her wearing it and asked about it - she told me she found it and said she assumed it was just junk jewellery, but it turns out from my research when I looked at it the markings, it’s worth quite a lot of money.

It has no personal inscription on it (its not a ring) and I haven’t seen a post on our local group from anyone who has lost anything although I did tell her she could put a post up and if anyone described it then she should give it back.

She hasn’t put a post up and she is planning on keeping it, not cos it’s worth money she just likes it, she isn’t selling it.

I’m kind of feeling weird about it because it might be sentimental to someone. WWYD?

OP posts:
JMSA · 01/05/2023 17:21

Keyan · 30/04/2023 22:19

I don't see anything wrong with this?? If you find something on the floor in public and nobody is around looking for it then it is okay IMO to have it.

Lovely.

GabriellaMontez · 01/05/2023 17:35

GalileoHumpkins · 01/05/2023 17:19

There's a far bigger story here

I'm sure someone will be along in a minute to completely make one up.

🤣🤣🤣

LuluCurl · 01/05/2023 17:43

GalileoHumpkins · 01/05/2023 17:19

There's a far bigger story here

I'm sure someone will be along in a minute to completely make one up.

🤣

Diyextension · 01/05/2023 18:28

If I find something on the floor i pick it up quick and leg it as fast as I can before anybody clocks me ……..😤. I saw a fiver on the floor in a petrol station not long ago ago, put my foot on it quick then bent down and pretended to tie my shoe lace 🙂. It’s always finders keepers in my book .

GoodChat · 01/05/2023 18:43

Diyextension · 01/05/2023 18:28

If I find something on the floor i pick it up quick and leg it as fast as I can before anybody clocks me ……..😤. I saw a fiver on the floor in a petrol station not long ago ago, put my foot on it quick then bent down and pretended to tie my shoe lace 🙂. It’s always finders keepers in my book .

If you didn't think you were being a bellend with this behaviour you wouldn't try and be so discrete about it.

Original poster
AldiBag4Life · 01/05/2023 19:12

There is no bigger story here. I don’t think it’s a majorly attractive piece of jewellery, it looks like some of the costume bits you can find in Next/M&S it’s not intricate or any kind of special craftsmanship that’s obvious. DD did not keep it because she loves it she just picked it up as she found it in some grass and didn’t think to just leave it there or put a post up. She then remembered it months later and wore it once

the reason I think it’s valuable is that it is thick and weighs more than 10g and if it’s the type of gold the marking says then it’s worth a few hundred £.

I haven’t had any response to the FB post I put up - DD is not on Facebook and you can’t join the local group without a proper profile so she asked me to put a post up and she will put a post on NextDoor. I told her about the police advice and she looked it up, our local police do take valuable items but the station is miles away so she will sort out going there

OP posts:
switswooo · 01/05/2023 19:15

GoodChat · 01/05/2023 18:43

If you didn't think you were being a bellend with this behaviour you wouldn't try and be so discrete about it.

Show quote history

Think that poster was being tongue in cheek 🤣

GoodChat · 01/05/2023 19:17

My bad if that's the case @switswooo Grin

switswooo · 01/05/2023 19:21

@GoodChat I’m not sure who they’re giving the finger too though..lmaybe other claimants! 🤣

BreatheAndFocus · 01/05/2023 19:26

I live in a rural area and my police station take items in. In the last couple of years I’ve handed in a purse with money, and a driving licence that someone had dropped. For the licence they said they’d trace the owner, for the purse/money they said they’d keep it X amount of time and if no-one claimed it they’d let me know. Someone did claim it.

Do as you would be done by. If I lost something, I’d want to have it returned to me.

FairyPrincess123 · 01/05/2023 19:44

AldiBag4Life · 01/05/2023 19:12

There is no bigger story here. I don’t think it’s a majorly attractive piece of jewellery, it looks like some of the costume bits you can find in Next/M&S it’s not intricate or any kind of special craftsmanship that’s obvious. DD did not keep it because she loves it she just picked it up as she found it in some grass and didn’t think to just leave it there or put a post up. She then remembered it months later and wore it once

the reason I think it’s valuable is that it is thick and weighs more than 10g and if it’s the type of gold the marking says then it’s worth a few hundred £.

I haven’t had any response to the FB post I put up - DD is not on Facebook and you can’t join the local group without a proper profile so she asked me to put a post up and she will put a post on NextDoor. I told her about the police advice and she looked it up, our local police do take valuable items but the station is miles away so she will sort out going there

Good for her. If she were my daughter and I could afford it I'd be treating her to something.

Cazareeto1 · 01/05/2023 21:59

Fighterofthenightman1 · 01/05/2023 08:38

Agreed! Wtf is going on!

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I know right… 🤦‍♀️ you would think the kid robbed a bank killing everyone 🤦‍♀️ ppl need to get a grip and look at their own shit ffs. I feel sorry for OP

Rosula · 02/05/2023 00:23

FancyFanny · 01/05/2023 16:41

FFS! How many more times do people need to be told that the police won't take in items of found jewellery- the most you are expected to do is put a note in a shop window or post something on social media.

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As the quoted guidance shows, they won't take in low value items. They will take stuff which has some value, and OP agrees this item is valuable.

TheWitchOfShields · 02/05/2023 22:28

I would ask her again to try and find the owner.

I once lost my Pandora bracelet - some people might see this as 'junk' or not see the value of it, but it means the world to me and I can tell you every charm on it and when I bought it or was gifted it, they each have a meaning of my life events

Thankfully, it was found not far from my home & I had it returned because the finder posted on Social Media.

TheWitchOfShields · 02/05/2023 22:33

TheWitchOfShields · 02/05/2023 22:28

I would ask her again to try and find the owner.

I once lost my Pandora bracelet - some people might see this as 'junk' or not see the value of it, but it means the world to me and I can tell you every charm on it and when I bought it or was gifted it, they each have a meaning of my life events

Thankfully, it was found not far from my home & I had it returned because the finder posted on Social Media.

I've just read all your posts, OP. I'm glad your DD is trying to find the owner

Sennelier1 · 02/05/2023 22:58

Oh come on @LightDrizzle - and several others - I'm sure no harm was intended! A young girl finds a piece of what she thinks is fake, likes it, wares it. There's still a difference between innocence and malice!

SleepingStandingUp · 03/05/2023 00:04

SorePaw · 01/05/2023 14:14

@SleepingStandingUp

Don't be stupid.

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Is your sore paw making you rude or does it come naturally?

Nanaof1 · 03/05/2023 00:11

TheWitchOfShields · 02/05/2023 22:28

I would ask her again to try and find the owner.

I once lost my Pandora bracelet - some people might see this as 'junk' or not see the value of it, but it means the world to me and I can tell you every charm on it and when I bought it or was gifted it, they each have a meaning of my life events

Thankfully, it was found not far from my home & I had it returned because the finder posted on Social Media.

I have a version of the Pandora bracelet and I would be wrought if it got lost forever. I'm happy for you that it was returned.

user1492757084 · 03/05/2023 03:19

If you find something like this you should take it to the police station. If no rightful owner comes forward they give it back to you after a reasonable length of time.

Your friend might enjoy it more if she did not keep it by deceiption.

If the owner is found, a small reward will probably be given plus the warm fuzzy feeling of not being a thief.

SplendidUtterly · 03/05/2023 04:11

switswooo · 01/05/2023 14:18

Let’s get Inspector Gadget on the case. Hercule Poirot won’t be interested 🤣

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Lets also recruit Columbo and Jessica Fletcher to work on this. Op's daughter has committed an heinous crime after all....maybe bring Vera in to help too!😂

Peanutbutteryday · 03/05/2023 06:24

This thread is bananas. Besides, if someone had lost something of sentimental value I’m sure they’d have tried to find the item themselves, ie signs on lamp posts, posts on your Facebook page and you’d have seen this. I see this all the time. Yes Dc should and could try and find owner, but it’s really not as horrific as half the people here make out.🙄

Imisssleep2 · 03/05/2023 06:35

I would make a good effort to find the real owner, maybe spread search further than local group, but if no luck let her keep it, i read recently that stuff handed into the police is only kept a few months then thrown so would then go to waste, best off trying to find the owner yourself, you should prob put a post up about it too tbh. It may be sentimental to someone even if not inscribed.

RoseGoldEagle · 03/05/2023 06:48

Can your DD not think back to or imagine a scenario where she loses some special jewellery and thinks ‘it must have come loose and fallen off, I’ll retrace my steps’ and how hopeful she might be to find it? And if some random passer by saw it, and thought ‘oh well, no one around, I’ll have that’ would she just think ‘ah, fair enough then’, really?! She should at the very least post it on a local Facebook page, ideally she should take it to the police. It could be really special to someone. It wouldn’t even matter if it wasn’t valuable.

Whyamiherenow · 03/05/2023 07:39

Do you think your daughter is telling the truth about finding it? Tbh it sounds like something I would have said at 18 to stop my mum asking more questions. In fact I think I probably did say something similar when a potential love interest had bought me something. Just a thought.

Ponoka7 · 03/05/2023 07:46

My DD has lost? A gold necklace. We are offering £800 no questions asked. She's had it for twenty years and was forced to take it off while doing an activity in Wales. It's scummy to keep jewelry and phones, or anything really. If your DD ever has anything stolen, or loses something, remind her of this. People drop etc things in work, ask her if she'd keep their stuff.