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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Has anyone ever used a life coach?

31 replies

listoflists · 25/04/2023 06:58

If so what did or do you use them for and did they help you?

I see people offering 1-2-1 life coaching but it never says exactly what it is they do or how much it costs?

OP posts:
IamnotSethRogan · 25/04/2023 07:15

If you need help, I would talk to a qualified professional. Honestly the people I see spouting that they are "life coaches" are not people I'd want coaching my life

Lottapianos · 25/04/2023 07:25

'If you need help, I would talk to a qualified professional. Honestly the people I see spouting that they are "life coaches" are not people I'd want coaching my life'

I agree. I know two life coaches - both former colleagues of mine from before they started life coaching. Both nice people in their own way but not people I would go to advice necessarily. One is very self-absorbed and quite surface, the other is very kind but easily distracted and unfocused. Not saying all life coaches are like this, just sharing my experience

TheWayOfTheWorld · 25/04/2023 07:31

The problem with that industry is that many people are brilliant at the marketing and selling but totally unqualified.

Signs they may be a bit dodgy:

  • they insist on you signing up to an expensive programme
  • lots of pressure to sign up quickly because slots are filing up/that price is going to be higher next time
  • they have a super duper method/number of steps/programme with a trade marked name "Followikg my foolproof SeVen Steps to Success Matrix (tm) blah blah"
  • you need to be willing to invest in yourself (or pay them a wedge of cash)
  • if it doesn't work it's because it's your fault and you didn't put the effort in/work hard enough/believe

Also have a listen to A Very British Cult podcast. Eye opening.

Pamandherpampams · 25/04/2023 07:31

I went to one about 5 years ago for help with dealing with difficult clients. It was four very expensive hour long sessions that were extremely helpful to me and gave me the confidence to raise my own fees.

I’d go back if I had a very specific difficulty. I found it much more practical than therapy (which I have also found useful for different problems)

TheWayOfTheWorld · 25/04/2023 07:31

On, and the pricing often ends in a 7. £597, £997, £1997 etc.

sylvandweller · 25/04/2023 07:34

What help do you want?

FotheringtonThomasMinor · 25/04/2023 07:34

I’d be wary without a personal recommendation. It’s completely unregulated- any idiot can set up as a life coach. Why would they have any more wisdom than you do?

Would recommend watching the life coach episodes of Peep Show 😭

lkkjhg · 25/04/2023 07:34

Have you though about seeing a qualified counsellor instead?

daretodenim · 25/04/2023 07:36

What is the problem you're looking for help with op?

Bimbom · 25/04/2023 07:36

Who, when at school, has being a life coach as an aspiration? It's the kind of thing that people fall into when other careers haven't worked out. Nobody truly successful is a life coach and for that reason I wouldn't want their coaching.

VituperativeGigaTroll · 25/04/2023 07:39

I was sceptical because of just how many I see all over LinkedIn, and the fact that there's no regulatory body stopping anyone calling themself a coach with no need for any qualifications. But, I had a session with someone qualified and it really changed my mind. Super helpful and worth the money. I agree with PP that having specific issues is best, a good coach can then help you find your answers. So if it's a qualified professional then go for it.

Rewis · 25/04/2023 08:07

I have. I went to a psychotherapist and realised it wasn't for me. Then went to a life and mindfulness coach and thought that was great. I don't think it's a replacement for a therapist if you need one. But if your 'problems" are not really mental health issues then a coach can be good. I talked and cried, made crafts, made goals etc. I was having a quaterlife crisis and was feeling off about career and relationship and how I was not young anymore and felt a bit lost. It has been 5 years now and she still texts me at my birthday and Christmas.

Obviously there are tons of differnet coaches out there so you need to read their background carefully.

Nofreshstarthere22 · 15/06/2023 17:28

I know someone who is a LC, hoped to make a lot of money while fitting it round her DCs, she hasnt. What she has done is invested thousands to be coached by a life coach. Also had free session with her, was told to meditate and journal, oh and not nap even though chronically ill.🤨 When I heard she was coaching someone to help their anxiety, it truly worried me.

JamSandle · 15/06/2023 17:29

The life coaches I know are more fucked up than there clients!

Definitely go to a therapist or counsellor instead.

Thepeopleversuswork · 15/06/2023 17:35

I think coaching for specific ends tends to be more useful than something as vague as "life coaching". I've had work-related coaching on two separate occasions (once paid for by work) and I found it very very helpful. I've also had therapy which again was helpful. I've never had relationship counselling but I imagine that can be useful if gone into with the right frame of mind.

But "life coaching" has always struck me as too vague and amorphous to be useful. You want to tackle goals one at a time and with specific focus, I think.

Nofreshstarthere22 · 15/06/2023 18:39

JamSandle · 15/06/2023 17:29

The life coaches I know are more fucked up than there clients!

Definitely go to a therapist or counsellor instead.

That was another issue, LC I knew, her life was fucked up

ContinuousProcrastination · 15/06/2023 19:01

Funnily enough a lot of "life coaches" seem to empower people to kick start their careers as.... life coaches.

ContinuousProcrastination · 15/06/2023 19:03

If you are looking for career support, look for a mentor within your own industry network. It should not cost you money, senior people want to develop those in the pipeline. I'm actively seeking up and coming junior staff to mentor.

Cabbagey · 15/06/2023 19:12

Also chiming in to say the people I know who have become life coaches are not people I would go to for advice. One worries me in particular, because she's one of the most unfulfilled and unhappy people I know; she struggles in most spheres of life - from jobs to relationships. Her website is amazing, though, and it really sounds like she's got some secret solution to life she can coach you in for her very substantial fees.

Lostthefairytale · 15/06/2023 19:14

I think it really depends on what your issues are and what you are looking for. Life coaching with the right person can be hugely beneficial and empowering. But you have to be in the right mindset and they have to be good at what they do. It is unregulated so there will be plenty out there that aren't.

However the reason it's a growth industry is because there is a need. Counselling is not the appropriate service for all issues. I had some counselling when I had work related stress and it was useless. I got a lot more out of the online course I did through the NHS which definitely had elements of life coaching (although it wasn't called that). I had never heard of life coaching back then but I think it would have been more beneficial for me than counselling.

Purplefoalfoot · 15/06/2023 19:43

Coaches don’t need to have their life together to help you. Number one rule of coaching is not to give advice so pp can all calm down about that one.

coaching is a specific skill which can be used in different contexts I.e. career, relationships, maternity leave etc. Coaches help you get something you want, the are future focused and that’s one of the main reasons they differ from counsellors. Now some coaches are trained counsellors too but most aren’t.

It’s a self regulated industry so you do need to do your homework on where they’ve trained and what supervision they have etc including whether they are insured.

I’ve been qualified for five years and now work at a large firm coaching their employees returning to work after any sort of leave. It is going really well for all concerned.

Toffeebythesea · 15/06/2023 20:11

There are no regulations regarding training to be a life coaches. Anyone can do a quick online course and claim to be a life coach.
I'd recommend seeing a qualified (QGG) careers adviser. This is a regulated profession which requires a one year postgraduate course similar to a PGCE

Feelinadequate23 · 15/06/2023 21:06

@Purplefoalfoot that sounds great and something I could have massively done with post mat leave