Where would you like to have grown up, place A or place B? (House move related)

[Coffeeandbourbons]

2 kids, 3 and newborn. Looking to move and due to office locations we have 2 options.

Option 1 - large, exciting, vibrant city. I lived here for 10 years and adored it, I have a good social life there but the downside is it’s very expensive (so house would be smaller and a bit crapper), and it’s not overly ‘green’ - nor is the surrounding countryside particularly remarkable. Kids don’t have a particularly outdoorsy life, it’s more about indoor activities. Schools are hit and miss some are very run down.

Option 2 - much smaller, less exciting City. Still nice, but a little Brexit-land and monocultural. Cheaper so could afford a better house and some holidays, and is surrounded by beautiful countryside and close to amazing beaches. I don’t really have any friends there so would be starting again. Schools better.

YANBU - Option 1
YABU - Option 2

As you can tell I can’t make my mind up! Thanks all.

Sorry that was counterintuitive, option 1 should be YABU… hope it’s not confusing!

2

Any comments appreciated too.

No brainer! Option 2. Better house, schools (SO important), holidays, countryside and beaches.

You’ll make new friends (through nursery/schools etc) and have a good social life there too!

2 . I don’t get the stress about living in an area which is politically opposite to yourself - I’ve been doing it for most of my life .

The Brexit-monoculture would put me off to be honest. A more cosmopolitan city would probably benefit DC.

My own home town can be a bit narrow minded / insular . I escaped and it did me a lot of good.

2 - you can afford to travel with this option to access the vibrancy and multiculturalism you value in option 1, and it sounds like your life will be more comfortable there

Where you know people every time. We didn’t and (because I work) are still struggling to find family friends a decade later. Most of the friendship groups here were formed at Primary school! And that directly affects what my DC are invited to (less so now they’re late Primary but it has affected things for a decade).

Its totally personal. I would choose 2 and sister would choose 1

2

I find that now my kids are later primary that they like to play in the street outside outside our house in the evenings and summer

I don't know about your voting, but I would go for 2.

I have chosen 1 and my brother has chosen 2. We are mostly happy overall, and slightly unhappy for different reasons but I would say my brother is unhappier because of the isolation. We do manage to get outdoors though.

Option 2, city with young children sounds a nightmare

I'd say 1 except for the school issue. Are there any options within city 1 where you could access decent schools?

I would choose 2.

A city with young children is fine!

Option 1 every time.

I moved to option 2 (work related) once the children were a little older we made lots of friends, the primary school was good and the secondary even better.

For the first couple of years it was hard but each time I looked at the original city I could see we made the right decision.

In your case you have beach access this would be plus plus plus (I would love a beach).

Think I'd need to know what the cities are. I don't remember caring about my house as a child. We played out in the streets, each other's houses and wandered around the not especially interesting town during school holidays. I think I had a happy childhood with lots of friends nearby. Long way of saying, kids will make do with what they have as don't know any different.

I don’t like the sound of brexit mono culture, but as few cities are genuinely like that, unless they’re the circles you move in, I’d still go for option 2.

I’m quite outdoorsy so the thought of most of my life being indoors seems just terrible to me.

The deal breaker for me as a child would have been bedrooms. If one option involved sharing & one didn’t, I’d have gone for the non-sharing option every time.

I’ve got no idea what your voting options mean but I’d go for option 2 but I don’t like cities and being near a beach is important to me

We went on a study break at Easter somewhere where my kids (teens) enjoyed but said they would HATE to live there because "it's in the middle of nowhere." Actually decent sized town! We live on the edge of London so loads of green and forest but it's 45 min tube to London. It's very nice and getting more so. Would a compromise like that be worth it?

Very MIXED! It's also nice but that's a useless word.