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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

He charged me £10 for a lift

110 replies

Seeusernamehistoryyy · 14/04/2023 23:44

It's our neighbour, we've known him for 6 years and I felt we'd become friends over that time so DH was happy enough to give him the odd cigarette when he asked for one.

This gradually morphed into him knocking on almost every day, sometimes even twice a day and DH continued to oblige even after the price of cigarettes shot up, it became quite annoying actually but he's a friend and all that jazz. He'd occasionally give DH the odd quid in exchange. DH didn't ask him to. He isn't poor btw he's a business owner who owns properties. He could easily buy his own but begrudges buying a full packet.

If he needed a hand with something heavy (he owns a shop) he'd knock on and ask DH for a hand lifting, or for help when he was building something in his garden. We borrowed the odd thing briefly like a drill / screw driver. You get the picture. Neighbours helping one another out.

Anyway.. we are moving house and don't have the use of our car at the moment as its in the garage. We needed to take a couple of small boxes to the new house a 5 minute drive down the road. DH asked neighbour if he'd mind giving him a lift there. No help lifting required. There wasn't much.. but too much to carry alone.

Neighbour says sure, we thank him and then once DH is putting the boxes in the boot he asked me for £10 petrol money, cheerily adding that it saves me paying for a taxi. The taxi would have been cheaper and you can drive 50 odd miles with a bloody tenner.

I was a bit gob smacked to be honest but handed it over as I needed to crack on but it has left a bad taste.

Are we being unreasonable or was he?

OP posts:
Fraaahnces · 15/04/2023 01:22

Also if he would have charged your DH?

suburbophobe · 15/04/2023 01:29

OP, he's not a friend, he's a user.

Ok. to ask for a tenner for petrol money but hey! that's a lot of cigarettes he's asked for. I reckon you've paid a lot more for fags for him.

The proverbial cheeky fucker with a charm and a smile. Be thankful he's out of your life.

he's a business owner who owns properties. makes him sound even worse.
Just fuck him off if he comes back.

Allosaur · 15/04/2023 01:33

I would have assumed he was joking! What a cheek. Next time he asks for a cig your husband should say "Sorry, I don't smoke!" (with one in his hand)

youshouldnthaveasked · 15/04/2023 01:36

Ahh well at least you won’t have to see him anymore now you’ve moved.

IamtheDevilsAvocado · 15/04/2023 01:40

At least that £10 has shown you what this 'friend' is, a CF...

You're there purely to facilitate HIS life...

At least you know now... No more cigs/favours.... Like you said, i wouldn't remain in contact with this user

IDontWantToBeAPie · 15/04/2023 01:57

I'd have taken the boxes out and called a taxi. Never help him again.

JudgeRudy · 15/04/2023 02:11

Seeusernamehistoryyy · 14/04/2023 23:44

It's our neighbour, we've known him for 6 years and I felt we'd become friends over that time so DH was happy enough to give him the odd cigarette when he asked for one.

This gradually morphed into him knocking on almost every day, sometimes even twice a day and DH continued to oblige even after the price of cigarettes shot up, it became quite annoying actually but he's a friend and all that jazz. He'd occasionally give DH the odd quid in exchange. DH didn't ask him to. He isn't poor btw he's a business owner who owns properties. He could easily buy his own but begrudges buying a full packet.

If he needed a hand with something heavy (he owns a shop) he'd knock on and ask DH for a hand lifting, or for help when he was building something in his garden. We borrowed the odd thing briefly like a drill / screw driver. You get the picture. Neighbours helping one another out.

Anyway.. we are moving house and don't have the use of our car at the moment as its in the garage. We needed to take a couple of small boxes to the new house a 5 minute drive down the road. DH asked neighbour if he'd mind giving him a lift there. No help lifting required. There wasn't much.. but too much to carry alone.

Neighbour says sure, we thank him and then once DH is putting the boxes in the boot he asked me for £10 petrol money, cheerily adding that it saves me paying for a taxi. The taxi would have been cheaper and you can drive 50 odd miles with a bloody tenner.

I was a bit gob smacked to be honest but handed it over as I needed to crack on but it has left a bad taste.

Are we being unreasonable or was he?

You're moving. Let it go and bring it up and giggle every now and then. Take it in turns to see how many things you can think off that CF has done. I guarantee you'll be emulsioning the ceiling and suddenly yell out something like Wheelie Bins or Birthday Cake 😆

DollyDoofer · 15/04/2023 02:24

Well at least you know when you have to move the next 3 boxes you’d be better off calling a taxi rather than relying on a neighbour to help

pollyglot · 15/04/2023 02:30

Ask him if he's declaring it on his income tax return.

MyopicBunny · 15/04/2023 03:13

Ugh I hate people like him. What a grasping ahole. YANBU

Appleshapedmum · 15/04/2023 04:09

Think of it as a bargain - that £10 has saved you money for the future as you’ll no longer stay in touch with the CF and be used by him again.

Tourmalines · 15/04/2023 04:12

He’s a tight arse cheeky fucker.

Whatthediddlyfeck · 15/04/2023 04:45

TrickorTreacle · 15/04/2023 00:02

How far was the trip@Seeusernamehistoryyy ? You might be a bit out of date with taxi rates as they have shot up over the past year.

Today, I needed to get from A, to B, to C. A was my home, B was to stop at a cashpoint to get some money out for the taxi driver and C was the destination. No more than 2 miles all-in-all and a few minutes wait while I got some money out. It came to £15.70. Not London, just the West Midlands near to Walsall!

Just how spectacularly have you missed the point?

JennyJenny8675309 · 15/04/2023 05:22

Obviously he’s a CF, but he knew he wouldn’t be getting free fags anymore since you’re moving house. That tenner will help him pay for a few until he can line up another neighbour to bum them from.

FangsForTheMemory · 15/04/2023 06:02

Do warn the person buying your house about him.

Ionlydrinkondaysendinginy · 15/04/2023 06:05

I think you need to send him a bill for all the cigarettes

ThePoetsWife · 15/04/2023 06:13

People like you and your DH are enabling cheeky fuckers. I would have stopped giving away cigarettes ages ago.

barmycatmum · 15/04/2023 06:25

Ewwww, I have secondhand embarrassment for him. How gross he is.
well, lesson learned, OP. Look on the bright side: at least you never would behave like that, and can sleep comfortably at night without cringing in memory of leeching off people. Bet he doesn’t have many friends!

SparklingChampagneAndStrawberries · 15/04/2023 06:27

It’s so annoying when you get caught off guard like that. Well, next time he wants a cigarette, you have two choices. It’s either a flat out No or 1/20 of the price of a packet (plus a 20% premium for you being so nice) You’ll recoup your money in no time with the premium 😆

Zanatdy · 15/04/2023 06:29

Next time he dares to ask for a cig I’d be saying it’s £10 for each one. Absolute cheek of it. My parents once had a neighbour they did loads of favours for, including lots of driving her to the railway station, she never offered any petrol money. Eventually (few years later) she announced she was taking them to a Carvery to thank them for all the favours / lifts (my dad did loads in her garden too. When it came to the bill my mum ended up offering to pay half as she said as my dad had a pint she felt she should - oh yes please she said!

pictoosh · 15/04/2023 06:46

Well I guess it worth the tenner to know where you stand.
Grasping wanker. How disapoointing.

Rosula · 15/04/2023 07:05

You should have opened the door when he came knocking and charged hm £5 for the cigarette.

Sunnysunbun · 15/04/2023 07:09

He really isn't a friend. Thank goodness you're moving he seems a right pain.

Fuerza · 15/04/2023 07:12

Some people don't notice what they take from you, but they really intensely feel anything given.

Whichnumbers · 15/04/2023 07:12

Well I guess the £10 is to buy a packet of fags, you’re moving away along with his free fag dispenser