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Original poster

Husbands work colleague

98 replies

Cherylscustardpies · 12/04/2023 12:21

Okay so my husband has this younger work colleague who he sometimes mentions in terms of they have a joke or conversation in passing. The other week I went with him to his work on a Bank holiday when no one else was supposed to be in, but she was and we bumped into her in the corridor. She wasn’t expecting my husband there and didn’t notice him at first. He said “Hi Angela (not real name) and she said “oh hi Rob what are you doing here” and he replied he was getting something from the office. She then very briefly looked at me but looked straight down at the floor and wouldn’t make eye contact or acknowledge me. We went then and carried on walking. Apparently the next time my hub is saw her she pretended “it was nice to meet your wife” but didn’t make eye contact when she said it. He has mentioned the jokey “saucy” banter between them all in the office and my spidery senses are on high alert.

what would any of use think to this if it was your husband and work colleague?

OP posts:
Facem81 · 12/04/2023 12:25

I’d think she was shy
but that’s because I trust my partner

you, however, don’t seem to trust your husband.

why did you accompany your dh on a bank holiday to his office?

SaltedButty · 12/04/2023 12:26

It is weird how he described what happened the next time he saw her

Facem81 · 12/04/2023 12:26

Apparently the next time my hub is saw her she pretended “it was nice to meet your wife” but didn’t make eye contact when she said it

huh? Your husband told you she didn’t make eye contact r when she said this to him? 🤔

Daisyoo · 12/04/2023 12:26

Sounds like you have literally nothing at all to base your "high alert" on. Why on earth were you in your husbands work with him?

AlwaysAlba · 12/04/2023 12:26

Without more, I’d say this is nothing. Whilst I’m perfectly okay meeting my colleagues unexpectedly, on a bad day I’d accidentally be very awkward with their partners…social communication isn’t easy for everyone. I would of course, say it had been lovely meeting their wife as I try very hard to be polite, even if I don’t do small talk well. The “saucy banter” on the other hand, I’d find very inappropriate in a work setting and your DH needs to be careful!

Throwncrumbs · 12/04/2023 12:27

Maybe she has a crush on him and felt embarrassed. Why was she there? Did your husband suggest you went with him? More info needed really.

Ponoka7 · 12/04/2023 12:28

He's got mentionitis and she's got something that she feels uncomfortable about. I'd say that your gut reaction is correct.

PricklyFoot · 12/04/2023 12:28

I'd think why did you go with him and why was he going in on BH when no one else would be there only they were....?

Littlepiglet123 · 12/04/2023 12:28

@Daisyoo apart from the saucy banter and frosty welcome....

Facem81 · 12/04/2023 12:29

Throwncrumbs · 12/04/2023 12:27

Maybe she has a crush on him and felt embarrassed. Why was she there? Did your husband suggest you went with him? More info needed really.

If anything - other way around

OP suspicious hence coming to office with him
and…

starting this very thread

PricklyFoot · 12/04/2023 12:29

I'd also think the way he relayed the subsequent conversation to you is really weird.

NorthStarRising · 12/04/2023 12:30

You don’t trust your husband. Why is that?
If he is attractive in whatever way, , he will have women hitting on him, but his fidelity is not their problem, it’s for him to make the choice.
You can’t save a relationship by seeing off everyone you perceive as competition.

Oubliette86 · 12/04/2023 12:30

She then very briefly looked at me but looked straight down at the floor and wouldn’t make eye contact or acknowledge me.

Did you leave part of the interaction out? Did your husband actually introduce you? Did he say Angela, this is my wife Cheryl?

Facem81 · 12/04/2023 12:30

She didn’t “acknowledge” you

did you husband introduce the pair of you?

Facem81 · 12/04/2023 12:30

How convenient that no one was meant to be in

but she was

you were suspicious already op. Correct??

Daisyoo · 12/04/2023 12:33

Littlepiglet123 · 12/04/2023 12:28

@Daisyoo apart from the saucy banter and frosty welcome....

Banter between them ALL.....just like a lot of work places.

Original poster
Cherylscustardpies · 12/04/2023 12:33

He asked me to go with him.

my husband has told me that she has a “potty” mouth sometimes and can be pretty dirty in her jokes sometimes. Also she once asked to see a pic of his wife. I don’t trust any man where younger females are concerned.

OP posts:
GBoucher · 12/04/2023 12:33

I'd find the looking down at the floor and avoiding eye contact odd. If I ran into a colleague with his wife and I had nothing going on with him, after saying 'Hi Rob.' I'd look towards his wife and introduce myself and say nice to meet you or something.

SliceOfCakeCupOfTea · 12/04/2023 12:34

I would assume that her first reaction to meeting you was to 'show' how not close they are and basically give you peace of mind. If she was dead chatty and familiar with him she may think you'd be suspicious.

Seems weird that he went on to tell you what happened next time he saw her...like he was trying to make you jealous

Daisyoo · 12/04/2023 12:34

I don’t trust any man where younger females are concerned

It makes sense now.

PricklyFoot · 12/04/2023 12:34

I don't know if she fancies him or not, but he wants you to think that she does.

SofiaSoFar · 12/04/2023 12:35

Daisyoo · 12/04/2023 12:34

I don’t trust any man where younger females are concerned

It makes sense now.

Indeed.

You'd be better suited to being single @Cherylscustardpies

Facem81 · 12/04/2023 12:37

Your husband told you she didn’t make eye contact when she said it had been nice to meet you? Most odd. Of your husband that is.

and he suggested you come to work with him because you’d been on at him all morning about WHY he was going in on bank holiday. So he text the woman to say… sex in the office is off the cards so just try to play normal

Amantissima · 12/04/2023 12:38

A shy or socially-awkward person might easily feel thrown off their stride unexpectedly encountering the spouse of a colleague, especially a longterm one they work closely with. You have a purely work relationship, on certain terms of daily intimacy, and then you encounter a completely different bit of their life in the place where you usually see them. I wouldn't necessarily see it as in any way suspicious.

WhyCantYourPartnerDoIt · 12/04/2023 12:41

Cherylscustardpies · 12/04/2023 12:33

He asked me to go with him.

my husband has told me that she has a “potty” mouth sometimes and can be pretty dirty in her jokes sometimes. Also she once asked to see a pic of his wife. I don’t trust any man where younger females are concerned.

He said “potty” mouth? And you have “spidery” sense for woman who tell bad jokes?

your posts are just embarrassing