To think parents' evening at nursery...

[User154871]

It's a tick box and a fairly unhinged one at that.

At the last one, I was told my ten month old had a 'target' of walking. I shrugged that sentence off because the rest of it was good and they are a nice nursery with lovely staff and activities.

This time, they said the 17 month old likes playing with others but 'we can tell she's an only child because she can't share'.

I don't know whether I'm being oversensitive because I has a MC in Nov and I hated the phrasing (they knew at the time but I don't expect them to remember)... but I thought that struggling with sharing was normal at 17 months?

The other target is to talk more as she only says five words clearly although she understands a lot more than that.

Please take with a pinch of salt, nurseries also have ofsted and need to show interventions and targets, which of course we all know is very difficult as they all progress at different rates. Yep tick box, more paperwork done. I do agree some early signs show certain traits but not to be e seen as permanent, just certain issues that may need support. X

We found it hilarious when we were invited to parents evening for our 2 year old! 🤣🤣

this sounds bonkers! 17 months is way too young for them to be able to have anything meaningful to say about your child.

Do nursery’s have to have parents evenings? I would actually appreciate this for my 4 year old who’s starting school in September but our nursery has never offered this.

It’s why Ofsted is not fit for purpose. Tick box stuff against EYfS instead of what’s important to you as a parent with your kids. I can see why EYFS is important to check they meet milestones etc but amount of admin they have to do is ridiculous!

Ofsted no longer require masses of paperwork though so if nurseries are still doing it then that's down to them.

Pretty ridiculous to phrase it as setting targets. I would say all kids of that age have problems sharing for a start. As for the speaking I think 17 months is way too young to be worrying. My first spoke 10 words by the age of 2, my second could talk properly by the age of 2. Now 3 and 4 both of their speech is fine so a bit early to panic I think. Personally I would miss the parents evening at this age, doesn’t sound helpful at all, my nursery used to tell me if they had any concerns as and when they had the concerns.

Yes it’s the tick boxes. In reception our flag ups were using scissors & play acting!

In one sense it’s quite nice to have a chance to sit down and talk to the carers about your child, whether they enjoy nursery, are making friends etc

But possibly that’s better done in a more informal way, or in day to day observations.

Id be sceptical of any kind of “targets” or trying to make it academic. Then again, if kids are going to be there all day every day (in some cases), I suppose they’ve got to make sure someone is keeping track of how they are doing, they’re learning something in the way they would have at home, and that it’s communicated to their parents.

I always request a chat with their key worker during nursery hours if I possibly can/need to- on the phone if I can’t get away from work- they have to facilitate that and the staff member is at least being paid for their time. I am glad not to give up my evening for a parents evening about my toddler and I’m sure they are too.

It's all such bollocks. Targets at nursery! - how ludicrous it all is. Just make sure they have fun and have plenty of stuff around - they will learn all by themselves - children are naturally curious - and at their own pace.

Can't escape the OfSted nonsense even in nursery.

I never attended a single nursery parents evening. The children were always at home with me much more than at nursery, so it seemed utterly pointless - I knew their strengths and weaknesses.

Umm my kids are only in three days but I still like to understand how they behave in the nursery setting and how their care givers on those days respond to them.

If there is an issue though - you’d expect them to deal with it before a parents evening.

Oh absolutely. Our handovers are at the door so always feels a bit rushed. Especially with two as my youngest is keen to get away. My nursery will make it a phone call if necessary. I have missed some but I do try and go.

It is not Ofsted it is the early learning standards and the targets are next steps based on developmental milestones to make sure you don't get to school with a child who at age 5 is not unable to achieve in school ....this could be picking up issues like hearing, sight, walking, the ability to hold a pencil, sharing, being around people it is not academic in any way. Children with development delay, lack of opportunity, inability to communicate, behavioural or physical difficulties etc. Do not just learn by themselves.....but yes learning with next steps is still through play.

It's not an academic target it's developmental. Many parents need support to move children on in areas like self care, dressing and independence for example. Many children don't regularly mix or play sharing games with others at home, parents don't see them listening to stories in large groups even at a library story time if parent is sat with them it's not the same as them sitting independently.....so you won't know if your child is making progress in these areas or in approaching other adults for assistance (not family but staff).

Oh our nursery is like that. Absolutely shocking. My first "parents evening" when my little boy was 2 (he had been at a childminder until then, we had a full report every evening. That went out of the window when he started that nursery), I met his key worker for the first time ( I used to pick him up after she went home), and she said "So, what do you want to know?" I was so shocked, I didn't know what to say. I'm a teacher so I know exactly what I want to say, and will then ask the parents if they have any questions. The only tangible thing I remember her saying was that she didn't know where all the food he ate was going (he's always been skinny).
I beat myself everyday for sending my lovely little boy to this horrible place he hated going to (they had to peel him off screaming from his dad's arms every morning).