To not expect to pay excessive amount as we're family.

[Boop1e]

In laws brought themselves a caravan on a haven site a year ago. Decided to spend some pension money on it.
the site fees have renewed and have gone up just like everything else in life.
They don't rent it out and we only use it as family.
Anyway father in law has just charged his own son £75 for 3 nights to use it. He owed me money for ordering him a new tablet and doing him a favour so took the money out of that which I couldn't afford to lose.

Before the season started he mentioned charging £25 a day but nothing else happened and no mention of it again before we went.

He's also charged brother in law £150 to use but they paid upfront.

Am i being unreasonable to feel this is a lot to charge your own children and £10 or so a day would be sufficient. I'm not convinced I spend £25 a day heating and lighting my 3 bed home. They get their passes included with the caravan for 10 people.

Husband won't challenge it because it won't make any difference.

@Boop1e I hear you! Took me a long time to recalibrate my expectations and realise it wasn’t because my PIL aren’t helpful or generous people. They just do things differently to how I was raised. They couldn’t win TBF because I used to feel super awkward about taking cash/expensive gifts like a new washing machine. I just couldn’t compute why they’d do that for no apparent reason!

@BraveFaceScaredInside but you can't do it, so how would you know!

🤦‍♀️

It costs a fortune to have a haven caravan!

So you might just think

Cheap holiday for them

Bit of money for me, which means I can afford this for a longer time for everyone to enjoy it!

It sounds like PIL could afford to pay for all these things they get from their son and DIL, so them getting these things for free is a benefit.

Families help each other so most people who have their son and DIL do so much for them wouldn’t begrudge them a caravan stay.

On thin ground to declare "they can afford to treat us" as in, OP decided how ILs should spend their money. Anyway, ask for petrol money next time there is an airport run, ask for contribution to evening meal you host, ask them to pay you for decorating. Or ask if you can trade these things off for time in caravan if that would suit you.

You can't take it with you

Well, op is trying very, very hard...

£75 for a three night stay at a haven site is a bargain. It could be that your in-laws feel taken advantage of - have you ever offered them money to stay? If their costs are going up then I understand why they're asking for some money towards stays and, relatively, it's really not a lot of money so I do think YABU op.

@StuartBroadshairband Sadly it's not bollocks, I know a few people who paid over £1000 for a van in the summer holidays, still much cheaper than going abroad.

No, but the post I replied to didn't specify that. She claimed Haven charge a grand and I have never paid even a hundred, so she is categorically incorrect.

Great. Enjoy it.

I'm looking forward to mine in a couple of weeks for £85. Could have gone elsewhere that week for £49, but didn't fancy that location

It is bollocks. Some parks and some caravans will be over a grand. I've seen them.

She said Haven charge over a grand. They do - for some holidays. I've been away there five times and have spent a grand total of less than £350, yet according to that PP, I must have spent over £5000. My holidays cost less than OP is being charged by her ILs.

@StuartBroadshairband I'll assume that you don't have children? OP
does!

It is bollocks. Some parks and some caravans will be over a grand. I've seen them

So it's not bollocks then. You've just said yourself you've seen fees over £1k.

And I'm not replying to the OP, so that's irrelevant. I'm talking about the PP who insisted Haven charge £1000 per week.

£25 per day is not excessive in any way.

£25 a night is very very reasonable and I would consider that family rates and very happy to pay. Everything is loads more expensive I would expect to start chipping in.

Idk I've stayed in loads of havens and it's always been a couple of hundred quid for a long weekend

They charge £1000 a week to go in the school summer holidays maybe a bit more of less depending on the site £25 a day would be a steal then.

That's really cheap.

@StuartBroadshairband haven do charge £1000 a week, what makes you think they don't?

toomuchlaundry
Is there any point in time that adult DC getting freebies from their parents, treat their parents? Ever treated them to a holiday? Will you still be expecting them to finance your holidays in their 90s?
Not on Mumsnet, no. Parents owe their adult children financial support in perpetuity.

Well a) yes of course. I have paid for things for my parents. I literally cannot imagine a world where my parents would ask me for money. But equally I can't imagine a world where I would ask them!
Our family have definitely always subscribed to a 'what's mine is yours' type of attitude.

But b) it gets passed on. My grandparents never asked my mum for money. My Nan is in her 90s quite often pays for things for my parents/ my uncles. And I absolutely cannot imagine that I will charge my adult children for things either!

@StuartBroadshairband I categorically didn't "insist" that Haven charge over £1000 a week. You yourself have said you've seen they charge over £1000 a week for some sites so me thinks it's you talking bollocks. Feel free to Google Perrin Sands sea front for a week 20th to 27th May. It seems it costs £1243. When I was at school that was considerably more than £1000. So DFD.

What part of they dont always charge £1000 a week is difficult to comprehend?

Mercedes charge over £150000 for some cars, doesn't mean that's what a poverty spec A class costs.

I'm very confused as to what your point is, Stuart.

What part of they dont always charge £1000 a week is difficult to comprehend?

Where has anyone said that ? In school holidays a decent haven site can charge £1000 and upwards. Nobody has said "every" haven site charges this amount regardless of the time of year.

I agree with you, I wouldn’t dream of charging my friends or family!
My parents have a holiday house: myself, my friends or any other family member stay whenever we like and we do not pay anything. Once I asked to chip in for the bills (such as electricity) but my parents were offended and told me never to ask such thing again.

How nice for you. Unfortunately for op, she was advised in advance that the charge would be £25 per day 🤷🏻‍♀️

Is it remotely relevant that your Mum would do it differently?