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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Friend charged drinks and desserts to my hotel room.

583 replies

annaherrings · 09/04/2023 07:34

I was NY where we have an office (the company I work for that is). I was staying in a hotel (paid for by company). I had two friends from London who were in NY at the same time visiting for Easter break. They wanted to meet up and I invited them to my hotel for lunch/drinks. I do not expense my hotel charges as I never have work meetings at the hotel and our offices are where all meetings are held. We also eat out a lot and work pays for that. So I settle any incidentals bill myself - whereas the room is paid for.

We had lunch and everything was fine. I had to head back to my office so I settled up. The waiter asked what my room # was when I asked to charge it to the room as I had to go. So I told him/said it out loud. I signed the check/bill and left. Before leaving, the two girls said: 'We might stay for one more in the adjoining bar'. That was obviously fine. They are free to do what they want/go where they want.

Upon checking out; I see extra charges of 4 drinks and two desserts. Totalling $140 and I'm pretty sure two of the drinks were champagne. (It was a 5* hotel in Manhattan).

It stood out because I was only aware of the lunch total since it was the only thing I charged to my room throughout the entire stay. So it wasn't exactly hard to spot.

I asked the hotel for the actual receipt (the one which you sign your name/room # on). Sure enough, it wasn't my signature. They had even added on the 20% tip.

When I queried them (the girls) on it, they said the hotel staff (same waiter) immediately charged it to my room and didn't give them a chance to pay. They 'wanted' to tip (tipping is a big deal in the US) so they said they asked for a check/bill - and tipped via the room - meaning my card. Hence the receipt in front of me. They also wrote down my room # since they heard me say it out loud prior.

I do not believe they didn't have a chance to pay. If they really wanted to, they could have. They then said they assumed my work was paying (I work for a famous/large bank) so we aren't exactly short of company money - hence their 'assumption'.

They then said they did 'ask me' if it was ok to 'stay for one more at the adjoining bar' and that I was more than ok with it.

To clarify, they didn't 'ask' and moreover; no two grown women need to ask my permission as to where they can go. It is entirely up to them where they go and what they do.

I need up paying their bill as I didn't want any awkwardness. I haven't responded to their texts and TBH, I'd rather just never talk to them again. AIBU to think there was no misunderstanding here? I could never ever walk out of a place - 5* or not - and not pay. The audacity of charging anything to a friend's room - and not even telling them about it after the fact - is unbelievable to me. My DH says to drop it and leave it be and called it 'cheeky' but not worth losing friendships over. I suspect he just doesn't want to engage.

OP posts:
Tactica · 10/04/2023 22:51

Ugh. YNBU, OP.

Knowing myself, I would stew about it fairly silently, write off the money, but cool down the friendship. A civilised arm's distance from now on.

PriamFarrl · 10/04/2023 23:01

Katrinawaves · 10/04/2023 22:47

Literally the whole point of this thread is that to have paid $300 for her friends’ lunch was already extremely generous of the OP - ie that it isn’t a run of the mill amount which wouldn’t have already struck the friends as being very kind of OP to pay.

Clearly OP is in a position to be able to afford to pay this as a one off but spending half as much again of OP’s money without her consent is absolute cheeky fuckery on the friends parts.

I do hope they responded to the OP yesterday with a sheepish apology and an offer to reimburse her and that this was a tipsy error of judgment and not premeditated dishonesty on their part.

I get that the op was being very generous, and I think that the pair are taking the piss. The problem I had was with this:

‘I genuinely thought some kids had infiltrated the thread because it was the only way I could understand the thinking (£300!!! Wow!! She’s rich!!) but I am told I was mistaken and that they are adults.’

The insinuation I took was that anyone who thought that £300 was a lot of money was a child and actually £300 is a perfectly ordinary amount to spend on lunch.

But I don’t want to rehash an old argument so please let’s move on and find out if they ever replied.

Katrinawaves · 10/04/2023 23:05

Yes that post you quoted @PriamFarrl was a bit tone deaf. I agree with you on that.

Peridot1 · 11/04/2023 09:29

I think that post you are talking about @PriamFarrl and @Katrinawaves was in response to one particular poster who couldn’t seem to accept that yes it’s a lot of money but that for a five star hotel in Manhattan it is par for the course. The poster kept claiming it was tacky to pay that much. We all know it’s a lot of money. We all know some people spend that regularly because they can. Same as we all know some people can afford a Ferrari and others can’t. It wasn’t a comment saying that if you can’t afford to pay that you must be a child more if you don’t understand that lunch for three in a five star hotel in NY with drinks CAN cost that it may be a child. I wouldn’t say that myself just trying to explain the reasoning.

GrumpyPanda · 13/04/2023 00:29

So have they paid up @annaherrings?

Coulditreallybe · 17/04/2023 12:26

Have they paid @annaherrings ? Hope
so!

Nanaof1 · 19/04/2023 02:36

I wish the posters would be kind enough to update their thread. I think many of us would like to know if the freeloaders redeemed themselves at all by paying their bill.

readingismycardio · 19/04/2023 05:30

@annaherrings so...? Grin

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