Is my husband right to be embarrassed when I serve soup for lunch to guests

[MusicLass]

This is a bit of a long-running joke in our house, but underpinned by genuine feelings…

i like making soups from scratch (E.g vegetable, lentil, minestrone) and try to make them tasty, nutritious and filling. For some visitors I make soups for lunch or dinner, for the same reasons above, plus I can make them in advance and just reheat giving me more time to be attentive to guests. I also either bake or buy nice bread and butter to go with the soup. Something for pudding would be offered too.

DH gets embarrassed when I serve soup to guests, saying it’s not proper food and it’s not being hospitable. He would expect a pasta or rice dish round someone’s house, or meat.

He happily eats soup when it’s just us as a family.

AIBU to serve soup to guests? Or is he right? Generally he is more sensitive about social etiquette than me. He’s also from a Mediterranean culture, which could be a factor here.

Thanks for reading and helping us to settle this!

Soup is my go to when we have guests for lunch. I put a lot of effort in especially in the winter.

Tell him he is a tosser😄

I love soup, can't make my own anymore. But even when we went to the Chinese buffet I would rather 2 plates of soup over dessert

I think it's a lovely offering for your guests . Homemade soup and good bread is a healthy nutritious lunch

Fine for a weekday or Saturday lunch, or as a starter for dinner.

Homemade soup with nice bread & maybe cheese too is a very nice lunch.
Wouldn't serve it to guests for dinner though, without a main meal too and prob something for desert, like fresh fruit or ice cream

Yesterday (Monday) I made sweet potato soup (fresh from my garden), with fresh ginger, garlic, coriander and coconut cream. Served with fresh bread rolls and a plate of avocado/tomato/capsicum slices and cheese. My guests raved over it.

Could I be cheeky and ask you to share the recipe please? That sounds amazing 😍

My friend makes the most amazing soups. It’s always a complete off the cuff whatever’s in the fridge job. But i always look forward to being invited to lunch at hers.

Evening meal, I’d say do it as a starter. But that’s just me, each to their own.

I would love home made soup and bread for lunch ♥️ not an evening meal though unless it’s served as a starter.

Bit harsh you don’t know him?!

For lunch it's fine. I sometimes do it for evening meal if we've had a big lunch. Only in colder weather though. When it's getting warmer I do a lot of meat in the slow cooker. Which we have cold with salad.

This is totally a cultural thing. My husband is also from a Mediterranean country and likewise he would think it odd to invite guests for dinner / lunch and offer them soup - soup is a snack type food in many Mediterranean countries and certainly there I think guests would find it a bit strange to be offered soup as a main meal. Perhaps being 'embarrassed' is going a bit far, and indeed, he could also contribute to the cooking and offer to make or help to make something which he thinks is more appropriate.

My granny used to make "stewp" as a main course on her wood range, Thick, meaty soup full of vegetables from her own garden, It would simmer for hours, filling the house with the most delectable aromas. Nothing wrong with stewp as a main meal.

I think some of you must have Abigail's Party type 'dinner parties' (and 'couples' lunches', whatever they are), with people judging and point-scoring.
I've happily eaten soup for dinner and lunch at friends' houses loads of times. I wouldn't dream of thinking it wasn't enough or wasn't 'conventional' or anything like that.

I agree.
Inspired by this thread I made https://www.sainsburys.co.uk/gol-ui/recipes/tuscan-style-pasta-and-bean-soup for tea. It is very substantial and most definitely not a starter style soup.

I'm staggered at the ignorance of posters who think that soup is only a drink . Some soups are a meal in themselves - see below.

Your soup with bread and butter does sound lovely. Perfect for lunch but I wouldn't serve that for dinner (it's enough for me but I know for most it isn't) therefore the soup wld need to be a starter if part of evening meal.

Elle2018
Of course, you are welcome to my recipe...only it's a very ad hoc one, owing to the quantity I'm making, and guests' aversion to coriander. So basically it goes like this:
Fry together, in a couple of tablespoons of butter : one medium onion and 2 cloves of garlic, finely chopped, a heaped teaspoon of finely grated ginger, curry powder to taste-a couple of teaspoons or so, fresh coriander to taste. Fry until soft, add about a litre of chicken/vege stock, add 3-4 (about 750gm) kumara (sweet potatoes), though I have plenty in my garden so tend to use more, as they improve both flavour and texture. They should be in smallish cubes. Simmer until soft, cool, then add one can coconut cream. Whizz in food processor till creamy. Check for seasoning - despite the stock, it tends to need salt. Serve with chopped flat-leaf parsley and/or coriander on top, with a dob of sour cream and toasted sunflower seeds if you want to be truly decadent.
I make a big quantity at a time and freeze 3-4 containers for the winter. Nothing better by the fire!

Even a hearty soup is strange to serve as the main course at dinner. There’s a reason that soups are rarely a main option at restaurants. You’re unlike to feel satisfied.

I’d probably not mind it for lunch though with nice bread.

That recips sounds delicious @pollyglot.
Where do you live that you call sweet potato kumara, and grow it in your garden?

i wonder if the issue here that many Mediterranean cultures make lunch the main meal of the day and have a light supper. I think soup is fine as the ‘lighter’ dish ie lunch or light supposed but your husband is maybe thinking the entertaining is for the ‘main meal’.

Rampantivy

Sub-tropical Far North of New Zealand. Everything grows here, even without being planted. In my garden, I have fruit trees ranging from Bramley apples to figs, bananas, limes, grapes, passionfruit, oranges, lemons, guavas, pawpaws. It's absolute paradise.

Sounds fabulous @pollyglot.

I eat what I'm given as a guest 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️. I would be happier with a nice soup and bread than chicken prepared in a way I didn't particularly like.

It would be for me . I love homemade soups and nice bread . I like making soups too !

Soup is ok for an informal lunch at home. Nice bread. Cheese after and some wine if you want to be a bit more generous. Soup in the evening, at dinner, is a starter, not the main meal. I would feel very odd about it if I were asked to dinner and got soup and bread followed by cheese. I'd wonder why I had been invited. Dinner - soup as a starter, main course, dessert, cheese board, and coffee (or tea if preferred) to finish. Soup, followed by nothing more than a pudding, for dinner guests (who will expect a proper meal) is a bit off. Do you get many return dinner invitations? If so, do they amount to soup and pud?

Depends on what mood I’m in. Soup isn’t go everyone’s taste but I wouldn’t judge you if that was what you’d made.
As others have said- presumably not for dinner.