Is it selfish to ride pillion on a bike with DH?

[Fifi1010]

My DH has a new motorcycle he wants me to ride pillion I have all the correct safety gear. I feel selfish though as we have a 10YO DD. I know it's likely to not happen but the thought she could be left an orphan. I do like going on motorcycles I find it really fun. Would you do it or are my days of motorcycling over and leave it just DH?

WTAF?

He won't ever give it up not going to happen. He would get depressed he's always been an adrenaline junkie.

I've only ridden pillion twice on my husband's bike since having kids. Both times I felt guilty throughout, so could be the same for you? I wouldn't judge others who choose to, though. It's not something I enjoyed much before kids either!

People really judge about this? 😯I had no idea. I ride pillion on DP's bike very frequently.

Do you also feel guilty for crossing the road with him, or getting in a car with him, or having a weekend away with him....

Get your own!

I was thinking that as if we go together for rides if one of us gets in trouble the other would be fine.

I am a motorcyclist, and the only part of the OP's comments is the "adrenaline junkie" part. One can only hope that motorcycle rides with both parents aren't hooning around inviting an accident. Otherwise, no issues although I agree you should get your own 🏍

It's a very personal decision

I have no interest in motorcycles so easy for me to say don't do it but if it was something I loved then I imagine it's a much harder decision

Ultimately it depends how much you trust your DH's bike handling skills and risk assessment abilities.

I do struggle to get past the fact that some of my relatives who work in hospitals refer to motorbikers as 'mobile organ donors' and there is no denying that the risks are significantly greater than they would be in a car.

I remember feeling worried about both us travelling together if the children were elsewhere. It wasn't guilt , more a fear that we could be wiped out together , leaving them alone. I didnt ride pillion until the children were almost independent as I couldn't shake the fear.

Indeed

Given that he is an adrenaline junkie I would never get on a bike with him.

Why do MNers say this? She was born 10 years ago it's not like I can go back and give her back it was also an unplanned pregnancy. I fell in love with DH because of his lust for life it would be cruel if I banned him from everything he did before . He's thankfully stopped skydiving as it got boring 🤣🤣🤣

This. Good grief, I don’t know how some people ever leave the house!

Some mumnetters would have both parents completely give up their own pleasures in life to be a total slave to their children. It really isn't necessary. You do you, enjoying life matters too

Depends how they are ridden of course. Unfortunately many are ridden by speed freaks who think they are invincible. And many don't have the proper safety equipment. You see signs on cars saying "Think Bike, Think Biker etc" but all the careful car driving in the world can't save some bikers from their own idiotic riding.

I can't speak for the OP's partner, but when I'm on the back of DP's bike we have a bluetooth device for chatting to one another and he will only ride how I feel comfortable.

Except that riding on a motorbike is literally 50x more dangerous than getting in a car.

https://www.hudgellsolicitors.co.uk/news/motorcycle-accident/motorcycle-accident-statistics-show-bikers-50-times-more-likely-to-suffer-a-fatal-injury-than-car-drivers/

Where are people getting that cringey ‘adrenaline junkie’ from? He has a motorbike. Lots of people do, ride them responsibly, yes, even if they have children, with no recklessness or death wish. Are these the, frankly, weirdos who won’t leave their kids alone at 17?

Always ridden pillion on the back of my husband's bike, but then went one step further and took my bike test and bought an 800cc motorbike of my own. Being a parent doesn't mean your life stops

@midsomermurderess
Because that's what the OP said in a later post?

If you do I'd just make sure you've got excellent life insurance policies and an up to date will with who you want to be your daughter's legal guardians set out. That way should the worst happen she's at least got a financial cushion.