Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask what is so great about the uni experience

151 replies

MarquessofPembroke · 26/03/2023 10:29

That I keep hearing mention of on MN.

I'm not talking about the skills gained from studying for a degree but the "uni experience."

And what happens to the 50% of school leavers who don't experience uni.

OP posts:
carriebradshawwithlessshoes · 26/03/2023 21:45

Long haul to do their degree/ other qualifications whilst working with us at the same time I mean.

VanCleefArpels · 26/03/2023 21:52

Theelephantinthecastle · 26/03/2023 21:30

@VanCleefArpels it's 9% of your income, how is that a relatively small amount?

This demonstrates how much more education there needs to be in how student finance repayment works.

AliTheMinx · 26/03/2023 21:53

I think University is brilliant if you find the right fit! I had the most wonderful time at University, enjoyed the independence of moving out of home for the first time, but the safety of a friendly campus, and made friends for life from all walks of life. The numerous societies allow you to try new hobbies/sports and there are so many incredible opportunities for placement and academic exchange. The more you put in, the more you get out - and I agree with others that universitiy life can hugely help with confidence and self-belief. I work in a university now and watching students transform from Freshers to graduates and following their journeys over 4 years is immensely rewarding. Graduation is always an emotional day!

Frightenedbunny · 26/03/2023 21:56

I had the best time. I cut my apron strings away from my parents who both disapproved with me leaving home to better myself. (Both came from working class background and had no career aspirations.) I learned to be independent, think for myself, see and explore the world and made the bestest of friends, with whom I still have a strong relationship 25 years on. I feel sad that my children will probably either need to be saddled with debt or go down the apprenticeship route. I wouldn’t change it for the world.

Nowifi · 26/03/2023 22:14

I hated it! But I think it's because I stayed at home and never went away, wish I'd have gone to Manchester or something.

For me it never even entered my head to leave home, lived near London and went out all the time anyway, very easy going parents and I could do as I pleased really. As it was I moved into my own flat at 22 anyway.

I guess if you don't have much freedom at home or are looking for something else then it's probably great! I do wish I had a better experience.

Nowifi · 26/03/2023 22:20

Oh I also had to work at the same time while I was at uni, that probably didn't help!

housemaus · 26/03/2023 22:42

Oh that is interesting, @carriebradshawwithlessshoes - I do think it's more likely the fact that they haven't left home yet, rather than that they didn't do the degree, so it's very fascinating that hasn't been your experience!

I do think some people's uni experience can cause the exact opposite of growing up - a sense of delayed adulthood. Small campus uni with all-bills-included housing you can stay in all 3 years and a cosy student union bar on site, an hour from where your parents live is a very different experience to moving 200 miles from a small town to a London uni and leaving halls after the first year. Very different life skills learned, I think.

My uni had a LOT of students on a catered food plan and it was a small, self-contained campus with its own launderettes and a cleaner for communal areas of the halls, where people often stayed the whole 3 years - which I feel translated into more of a boarding school vibe than 'entering the real world'.

1offnamechange · 26/03/2023 22:53

I think a few posters are sounding a bit smug about the 50% who don't go to uni, suggesting they stagnate at home with mummy and daddy like overgrown teenagers.

In my experience it's swings and roundabouts regarding who matures faster.
On one hand you could argue the uni student living away matures in terms of meeting new people and having to take more personal responsibility in terms of budgeting etc.

On the other hand the non-student might still live with their parents for longer initially and perhaps get their dinner cooked for them (although bear in in mind uni terms are so short students still spend nearly half the year at home, and loads boomerang back after they've graduated!), but at the same time they are often holding down a full time job several years earlier, knowing that if they go out on the piss and are late to work they could face actual consequences, not just missing a lecture. In my experience the non-uni people tend to get married, have kids, and buy houses earlier too.

Plus does it really matter at what age you learn to operate a washing machine?
18 or 24, everyone has to do it at some point, it's not rocket science, nor brownies where you get a little competency badge!

Also it's not as linear as go to uni=move away, don't go = stay at home. Loads of teens are commuting to uni due to the increased costs whereas lots of non- students (armed forces, care leavers) leave home very young and live with a lot of other young people, taking a lot of responsibility at a young age.

WhatNoRaisins · 27/03/2023 07:20

Most of us can only comment on our own experiences. Based on my post-uni boomerang years I'm sure I would have stagnated if I hadn't gone to uni. I could find work ok but there just weren't a whole lot of social and developmental opportunities around me to take advantage of. If that had been my only experience of early adulthood it would inevitably have shaped me differently.

It must be different for people staying home but in areas where there are lots of different people to meet, interesting volunteering opportunities or appropriate groups to join etc.

redskylight · 27/03/2023 07:36

Ifailed · 26/03/2023 11:11

I see no one has addressed OPs second point - if going away to uni is so great, why don't we encourage all 18 year olds to move out and live with a group of other 18 year olds?

Well, I have an 18 year old who hasn't gone to university and I am trying to encourage just this.

Some of the very real problems are lack of appropriate housing (if you don't live in a place where people typically share houses and places don't want 18 year olds) and finding a group of 18 year olds to share with (as most are living with their families or have gone to university).

For me, university is about pushing yourself out of your comfort zone before you get too set in it.
It seems to me that people who don't go to university (and of course this is a generality, not individuals) are more likely to stay living in their home town and mixing with mainly their family and school friends for years to come. People who do go to university are more likely to then go and move somewhere else for a job.

dayswithaY · 27/03/2023 08:09

Most people here are referring to their own time at University, several years ago. It’s very different now, students are paying for everything and getting into debt for years so the stakes are higher. Young people today are very different to those growing up even 10 years ago.

I just spent an evening with my friends screaming with laughter about our drunken nights out, dodgy rented accommodation and the boys we met when we were 18 until our early twenties.

None of us went to university, we all started work at 16-18 and moved into our own flat and spent years partying and working in the 1990s. It was perfectly acceptable to not go to uni and get a good job at 18, and easy to leave home.

xSilverandcoldx · 27/03/2023 08:18

Personally I hated it. I did a year out after school where I just worked to save money and stayed at home. I had way more fun doing that and learned more too. I had plenty friends in my home town and a good social life.

However I have always had a good relationship with my parents and I took the time to learn skills I thought I would need for living away from home. Washing, cooking etc.

I only went to uni so I could get the job I wanted at the end, not for the partying experience. I found a lot of the other students quite spoiled and immature, and I hated living in a messy dirty shared flat. Though in hindsight maybe this was because I'd already done the partying and boyfriends thing so it wasn't as new and exciting?

Theelephantinthecastle · 27/03/2023 08:28

PhotoDad · 26/03/2023 21:33

9% over a threshold roughly double the tax threshold...

I know that, it's still a lot of money.

When I was earning 50k, every pay rise I got, half disappeared in tax and loan repayments. I definitely noticed the extra money when I paid it off.

Theelephantinthecastle · 27/03/2023 08:58

Marginal tax rates for those paying off student loans are much higher than is generally considered acceptable

https://www.bloomberg.com/news/newsletters/2022-11-24/you-re-paying-much-more-tax-than-you-thought

For me it was worth it and I think most people benefit. But let's not pretend it's tiny amounts

You’re Paying Much More Tax Than You Thought

The UK’s top marginal income tax rate isn’t 62% — it’s much higher than that

https://www.bloomberg.com/news/newsletters/2022-11-24/you-re-paying-much-more-tax-than-you-thought

VanCleefArpels · 27/03/2023 09:10

Assuming £50k loans, and salary of £30k for someone graduating last year repayments are £5 a week ie the cost of (not quite) one Pret lunch. You can’t tell me that’s going to stifle a young graduate’s life

https://www.studentcalc.co.uk/

Theelephantinthecastle · 27/03/2023 10:59

VanCleefArpels · 27/03/2023 09:10

Assuming £50k loans, and salary of £30k for someone graduating last year repayments are £5 a week ie the cost of (not quite) one Pret lunch. You can’t tell me that’s going to stifle a young graduate’s life

https://www.studentcalc.co.uk/

Well yes if you only earn a small amount over the threshold it's not going to be a lot. If you earn 50-60k, it is around £200/month which does make a difference.

Theelephantinthecastle · 27/03/2023 11:00

Theelephantinthecastle · 27/03/2023 10:59

Well yes if you only earn a small amount over the threshold it's not going to be a lot. If you earn 50-60k, it is around £200/month which does make a difference.

And quite a lot of grads have more than £50k loans as well - 4 year courses, higher maintenance loans can easily take that to £60k so you're paying it off for longer

VanCleefArpels · 27/03/2023 11:08

I'd suggest that £200 a month on a £50-£60k salary is not onerous

Theelephantinthecastle · 27/03/2023 11:10

VanCleefArpels · 27/03/2023 11:08

I'd suggest that £200 a month on a £50-£60k salary is not onerous

It depends on where you are in life. If you're 30 trying to get on the housing ladder, have a child and are paying childcare costs, it's not chump change. If you're living at home and have no living costs, sure, it's nothing

If it's so little money, why is the idea of a penny on income tax so controversial? That is the same for most households

VanCleefArpels · 27/03/2023 11:18

Well I would vote for 1p on tax but that's another conversation!

I think we need to radically change our thoughts about student finance - I see it as a small(ish) repayment for the benefit of getting a higher education which is likely to increase ones chances of earning better throughout life. Your graduate who has worked their way up to a £50k salary (not many start on that!!) will not "miss" the £200, they've never had it in the first place. Neither will they likely have a job paying that much without their degree.

Theelephantinthecastle · 27/03/2023 11:24

Overall I think it was worth it - and I have said that before - I agree that I wouldn't earn what I do without the degree. But I don't agree that the repayments are small.

When we both stopped paying off our loans, it was about £600 a month we suddenly got back as a household and it made a real difference to our lives. Suddenly we could actually save money, previously we were just breaking even after childcare costs and other living costs. And lots of graduates are in the same boat. I don't mind paying it, but I resent the idea that it was a tiny insignificant sum of money

SlipperyLizard · 27/03/2023 11:31

University was so much fun for me, some of the best years of my life.

I’d be really sad if my DDs missed out on it, as I think it is a brilliant half way house between full independence and being at home. Freedom to do what you want but there are adults (sort of) looking out for you.

DH didn’t go, and the key thing he missed out on was understanding how much it costs in the real world (he moved straight from his parents in with me)! But he still had a lot of fun in his late teens/early 20s so I don’t think he’d complain.

BellePeppa · 27/03/2023 11:53

thelittlebanana · 26/03/2023 18:01

@IDontWantToBeAPie but a lifetime tax almost. Why would you want to pay so much tax for something that doesn't really buy you back a lot of value anymore unless you're really in a specific job that needs it.

Nowhere near the value a degree held 20 years ago. It's such a shame what's happened to the job market. When I graduated there really was a choice of university or no university for many more job openings. Makes me sad when I see the junior roles in my company which once just needed half a brain now require a degree and pay even less than when I started!

This is what is so annoying. I have barely a qualification to my name but the job role I had for ten years the company now advertises as needing a (unspecified) degree. Why? It’s an admin role and absolutely does not require a degree.

maxelly · 27/03/2023 13:03

The part that very few people have mentioned here is the value of the actual education itself. I do get all the issues with the debt, the attraction of a vocational course etc etc but a part of me is really sad every time someone says 'if your degree doesn't directly lead to a career earning X it's not worth it' or 'non vocational degrees are pointless' or 'it's only worth doing a history degree or you're going to teach history or work in a museum' or similar. The logical extension of those kind of comments is that all historic/literature/artistic knowledge and academia is also pointless, and the only academic subjects that should exist or be taught at university (and by extension, schools) are purely utilitarian, practical subjects that directly relate to jobs, work/earning money clearly being the only point of existence. That, or these subjects should exist but only as the ivory-tower preserve of those so privileged or insanely intelligent that they can dedicate their entire life to arcane academia, but the majority of people should have nothing to do with them. That's a pretty sad world to me, of course some people aren't interested in these things but I do think the chance to go deep into learning about our past, about the most beautiful works of literature and art the world has produced, to learn about the languages and cultures of other places in the world, to truly understand how the universe, biology, chemistry, physics works, I don't think these things should be the preserve of a privileged few, that's a choice and opportunity I would want to be open to all.

Now you might well say that that opportunity is wasted on 18 years old which to some extent I agree with, part of me does wish we could separate out the precious, once in a lifetime chance to spend 3 years in an academic institution with the best facilities for learning and access to top-level academics and teachers, from the part about living away from home but in a safe/structured environment, making friends, learning about yourself and growing up, having fun stuff which is equally important. For that I do think in an ideal world it might be nice to have something like a national service scheme (but not military based, or necessarily so). A lot of countries that still have national service allow an option for 'civil service' where kids spend a couple of years teaching or doing auxiliary healthcare/social care roles or working in transportation or infrastructure or whatever else contributes to society, whilst living away from home in communal facilities and earning enough money to socialise and have fun, which I think could be a really useful idea for many kids who are a bit lost after school and/or only interested in getting away from home without any real desire to study (obviously you'd have to allow exemptions for special needs etc). After their service they could perhaps then make a more sensible and informed decision about further study/apprenticeship/vocational training/getting a job...

But for the work obsessed amongst you, in pure career terms I did a 'pointless' arts degree and as well as it being the best time of my life and really enjoyable and interesting learning in and of itself, I also honestly do not believe I could do the job I do today without having done it (or not as well anyway) even though my career is in no way directly related (corporate role). I hate the phrase 'transferable skills' but learning how to think critically, analyse a text or source, write clearly and succinctly, structure a argument logically, present my work engagingly whether in writing or in person, how to research something properly and thoroughly but also how and when to skim-read, how to summarise, how to problem solve, overcome things which seem difficult initially, how to work with others and how to work alone also, and this is a bit more nebulous, but how to actually properly work hard at something, personally I found O levels (as they were then) ridiculously easy and A levels relatively so but at university I really understood for the first time what it was like to be in a whole room full of smart people who will definitely outclass you if you don't put the work in, but also where/how to work and when it wasn't needed, obviously I also wanted to go to the pub a lot but also not fail my degree, so I learnt through trial and error where to be tactical, where to really do all the background reading and truly know my stuff and where I could get away with winging it. And getting a degree is a big achievement and something to be proud of, which gives confidence in itself. All things I need to use on nearly a daily basis. If you'd thrown 18 year old me into my first job I'd have floundered, even if intellectually I was as capable of doing it then as I was at 21 I definitely didn't have all the skills and means and confidence to do so. Now perhaps I would have learnt 'on the job', perhaps someone would have seen potential in me and taken me under their wing, mentored me etc. and perhaps after a rocky start I'd have got there over time without the need for the 'safe space' of uni to learn in, but I think just as (if not more) likely I'd have been written off in the early days of the job as too shy or flaky or impractical and lost my confidence totally and stayed at a much lower level for life. That's why I encouraged all my kids into uni despite the frightening debt. They're not academic high-flyers but I really think it has been worth it for them...

SocksAndTheCity · 27/03/2023 13:23

I left school at 16 and home (and the crappy town where I lived) at 17; I had no interest in studying and just wanted to work and earn money, which I did. Bought first property at 20, similar to a PP, sold it and bought a much bigger one with the proceeds at 35 so no mortgage, now 50 and debt free.

I've been self employed for over twenty years, and I think having to be completely self sufficient early has helped a lot. Plus I'd seen groups of students around the town that I moved to when I'd not long started work, and I knew already that these weren't the people I wanted to hang out with (although obviously the ones not out behaving like dicks in public wouldn't have been on my radar).

No regrets whatsoever.

Swipe left for the next trending thread