Hating life with a puppy

[LL32]

My partner moved in at the beginning of the year, a month later we bought our first puppy. Neither of us has owned a dog before but were both super excited.

I hate my life now. I was so happy with my partner moving in, it felt so natural and my 12 year DD adjusted well too. Home has always been my favourite place and now I absolutely hate being here. My partner is very active in caring for pup so it’s not like he’s not helping.

We’ve just had a row over pup as he tried to come downstairs and take over because he thought I was getting too angry. This just felt so patronising and obviously hit a nerve because I do feel like the worlds shittest dog owner.

He loves pup and they are best mates, I just feel like the evil puppy hater and I’m jealous of the bond they have. I’ve had 3 hours sleep tonight and I'm currently on the sofa next to pups crate just crying. Someone please tell me it gets better because I’m starting to feel very very dark.

It gets better! The exhaustion is the hardest part. My puppy is 20 weeks now and has slept through the night since she was approx 11 weeks. The first 3 weeks being up in the night constantly nearly killed me! From 11 weeks she slept through the night but would wake up at 6am so it was better but I was still shattered. Since 14 weeks though she sleeps in until we get up - sometimes 9am on a weekend!
it’s still hard now as she goes through different phases I have to learn to overcome but it is so so much easier than before.
Stick with it and you’ll get there. I’ve already said I’d never get another puppy. If we ever get another dog I’ll be rejoining and adult because this has been so hard x

Here to promise you, like others have, that it gets better.

Ours crapped and peed all over the place, sometimes stealth crapped as well. Ate all our shoes and chewed walls and electrics.

She was crated but then got a tummy bug and cried so pitifully that we brought her into the bed where she crapped all over the place and when recovered she never went back in the crate.

Then we found out I am actually very allergic to dogs and she was making me ill.

Its been more than 10 years now, I take industrial grade antihistamines every day, she nolonger poops, barks, squeals or eats shoes.

She sleeps next to me while I work from home, curls up outside the bedroom door at night, gets all excited when my mum visits and runs back and forth to her bed to present toys for admiration, and likes meeting everyone in the village on her regular walks.

Everyone always thinks she is still a puppy and she thinks the whole world is here to love her. Her worst habit is the occasional silent fart, but I can forgive that, afterall I have a husband so I'm immune to that kind of shenanigans.

She is OUR WORLD.

I could never part with her and I now find myself on a desperate countdown against average life expectancy for her breed. I think we have maybe 3 more years left to lover her... and it's not enough.

I promise it gets better.

Hey!

I just came here to say you are absolutely not alone and are doing the best job you can! Puppy’s are cute but I don’t think people realise HOW frustrating and emotionally draining they can be especially when they’re younger. I work with a clinical behaviourist and even she (with 20+ years experience and countless degrees in animal behaviour) is finding her puppy frustrating even though he is essentially just being a puppy and displaying all normal behaviours.. it’s still hard especially with lack of sleep! You’re not a bad owner for feeling that way. ❤️

It does get better (feel free to disregard following advice if just looking to vent) but I would have a look round your area to see if there’s any puppy classes.. I think they’re really valuable for both puppies and owners as it helps create more of a bond and understanding of WHY the puppy is acting the way it is. There are also people in the classes going through similar frustrations which sometimes it can be nice to vent to people who get it because I think people look at puppies with rose tinted glasses until they actually have one. Puppy classes might help speed the process of getting better up and also help you build more of a bond with your pup :)

100% gets better. I HATED my puppy for the first three months, I mean hated!! it triggered my PND that I had with both my children. But now, he's my favourite child 😀. Always pleased to see me, always eats what I give him, never answers back and if I'm feeling crap he lays with me.

Close the crate and go to bed hell settle

The poor puppy needs rehoming. I don't think it's safe where it is.

The yapping won't last long. Either get some earplugs, or let him sleep in your bed!
As for the rest, YABU to be jealous of a puppy.

None of our puppies ever went in a crate...would you stick your child in one away from its mum etc when all they want is a cuddle. Nah they all slept on our next to our bed never had any problems other than teething when it came around. Had well over a dozen over the years and all grew old happily with us

It gets easier. The pup just misses its mum and it’s litter mates.