AIBU?
To think work are being ridiculous
Dolphin8765 · 19/03/2023 09:52
For work the main lanyard we are issued is a purple wire thin lanyard (photo attached). Myself and some other colleagues don’t like thin lanyards like that. The only other lanyard we are issued is wider like a normal lanyard, it’s a pride lanyard with the company logo on. We’ve asked work if we can buy and use our own lanyard and we were told. Aibu to think work are being a bit strict and ridiculous? What difference does it make if we use our own lanyard?

Am I being unreasonable?
AIBUYou have one vote. All votes are anonymous.
AnnoyedFromSlough · 21/03/2023 12:36
Quote: If you were a Labour voter and your employer offered you a choice of two lanyards, "Vote Tory" or purple, you wouldn't just take the purple one and not give it a second thought.
You'd think, "Wait, why is there a Vote Tory one? What does that have to do with my job? Why is there the option to wear a Vote Tory lanyard but not a Vote Labour one? Will it harm my career prospects if they know I vote Labour?"
Response:
If I worked for an organisation that allied themselves with, for example, the Tory party to the point that they would have a vote Tory lanyard then I would be aware of the affiliation and would just take the purple one. Surely it's unlikely that people working for organisations that promote pride are completely unaware of the fact.
RosaBonheur · 21/03/2023 12:59
AnnoyedFromSlough · 21/03/2023 12:36
Quote: If you were a Labour voter and your employer offered you a choice of two lanyards, "Vote Tory" or purple, you wouldn't just take the purple one and not give it a second thought.
You'd think, "Wait, why is there a Vote Tory one? What does that have to do with my job? Why is there the option to wear a Vote Tory lanyard but not a Vote Labour one? Will it harm my career prospects if they know I vote Labour?"
Response:
If I worked for an organisation that allied themselves with, for example, the Tory party to the point that they would have a vote Tory lanyard then I would be aware of the affiliation and would just take the purple one. Surely it's unlikely that people working for organisations that promote pride are completely unaware of the fact.
This just isn't true at all.
There are hundreds and hundreds of employers whose business has absolutely nothing to do with sexuality or gender, all sticking rainbows on everything so Stonewall will give them a shiny badge saying what a great place it is to work.
I'm a lawyer and have a lot of lawyer connections on LinkedIn. During Pride Month (Why do they need a month? Women only get a day and even that is hijacked by trans women!) almost every law firm changed its logo and website to rainbow colours. In some cases the change appears to be permanent.
Rosula · 21/03/2023 13:11
RosaBonheur · 21/03/2023 07:11
Wearing a visible political symbol, not because it is your free choice to do so, but because your employer would like you to do so, when your employer is not a political organisation, should not be part of anyone's job.
Once again, would you be making these arguments if the lanyard had the Conservatuve Party logo on it, or Black Lives Matter, or support for Palestine, or support for Israel, or Mormonism, or pro choice, or pro life, or Manchester United?
You'd be happy to wear a lanyard with any of those things on it even though it has nothing to do with your job? Really?
Rosula · 20/03/2023 23:56
You are so obviously twisting this argument to make a political point. We can all see that the plain lanyard isn't particularly thin, OP doesn't have sensory issues, she doesn't even claim it's uncomfortable. She just says she doesn't like it. There are lots of aspects of working life which people don't like - I don't like the fact that I have to share an office, for instance - but I put up with it because that's what it takes to do the job and get paid. Having to cope with a thinnish lanyard is hardly the most onerous thing anyone has to deal with in order to earn a crust.
RosaBonheur · 20/03/2023 15:47
So you can have a comfortable lanyard if you're willing to publicly dance to Stonewall's tune and an uncomfortable one if you're not?
Riiiight.
Ceryneianhind · 20/03/2023 15:34
I want people to shut the fuck up about their gender identities to be quite honest. I don't care, and I don't want to pretend I do.
I think that message is loud and clear.
The purple lanyard is not thin, and if OP wants to complain about it, thats up to her - but FFS if you do a job with a defined uniform where image is everything, then you have to put up with some discomfort
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WHY do you not accept the simple fact that no-one is making OP or her colleagues wear the rainbow lanyard?
If my employer was offering me a choice between a plain lanyard and a pro life one, they probably wouldn't be my employer - but I would simply opt for the plain one. Even if, like OP, I didn't like it. It's a piece of cord, FFS.
AnnoyedFromSlough · 21/03/2023 13:12
RosaBonheur · 21/03/2023 12:59
This just isn't true at all.
There are hundreds and hundreds of employers whose business has absolutely nothing to do with sexuality or gender, all sticking rainbows on everything so Stonewall will give them a shiny badge saying what a great place it is to work.
I'm a lawyer and have a lot of lawyer connections on LinkedIn. During Pride Month (Why do they need a month? Women only get a day and even that is hijacked by trans women!) almost every law firm changed its logo and website to rainbow colours. In some cases the change appears to be permanent.
AnnoyedFromSlough · 21/03/2023 12:36
Quote: If you were a Labour voter and your employer offered you a choice of two lanyards, "Vote Tory" or purple, you wouldn't just take the purple one and not give it a second thought.
You'd think, "Wait, why is there a Vote Tory one? What does that have to do with my job? Why is there the option to wear a Vote Tory lanyard but not a Vote Labour one? Will it harm my career prospects if they know I vote Labour?"
Response:
If I worked for an organisation that allied themselves with, for example, the Tory party to the point that they would have a vote Tory lanyard then I would be aware of the affiliation and would just take the purple one. Surely it's unlikely that people working for organisations that promote pride are completely unaware of the fact.
It's not true? So who is completely oblivious to their employers support of pride, given that they seem to be very public about it?
RosaBonheur · 21/03/2023 13:20
Rosula · 21/03/2023 13:11
WHY do you not accept the simple fact that no-one is making OP or her colleagues wear the rainbow lanyard?
If my employer was offering me a choice between a plain lanyard and a pro life one, they probably wouldn't be my employer - but I would simply opt for the plain one. Even if, like OP, I didn't like it. It's a piece of cord, FFS.
RosaBonheur · 21/03/2023 07:11
Wearing a visible political symbol, not because it is your free choice to do so, but because your employer would like you to do so, when your employer is not a political organisation, should not be part of anyone's job.
Once again, would you be making these arguments if the lanyard had the Conservatuve Party logo on it, or Black Lives Matter, or support for Palestine, or support for Israel, or Mormonism, or pro choice, or pro life, or Manchester United?
You'd be happy to wear a lanyard with any of those things on it even though it has nothing to do with your job? Really?
Rosula · 20/03/2023 23:56
You are so obviously twisting this argument to make a political point. We can all see that the plain lanyard isn't particularly thin, OP doesn't have sensory issues, she doesn't even claim it's uncomfortable. She just says she doesn't like it. There are lots of aspects of working life which people don't like - I don't like the fact that I have to share an office, for instance - but I put up with it because that's what it takes to do the job and get paid. Having to cope with a thinnish lanyard is hardly the most onerous thing anyone has to deal with in order to earn a crust.
RosaBonheur · 20/03/2023 15:47
So you can have a comfortable lanyard if you're willing to publicly dance to Stonewall's tune and an uncomfortable one if you're not?
Riiiight.
Ceryneianhind · 20/03/2023 15:34
I want people to shut the fuck up about their gender identities to be quite honest. I don't care, and I don't want to pretend I do.
I think that message is loud and clear.
The purple lanyard is not thin, and if OP wants to complain about it, thats up to her - but FFS if you do a job with a defined uniform where image is everything, then you have to put up with some discomfort
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How many employers do you think are giving their staff pro life lanyards, and how many employers do you think are giving their staff rainbow ones?
RosaBonheur · 21/03/2023 13:26
AnnoyedFromSlough · 21/03/2023 13:12
It's not true? So who is completely oblivious to their employers support of pride, given that they seem to be very public about it?
RosaBonheur · 21/03/2023 12:59
This just isn't true at all.
There are hundreds and hundreds of employers whose business has absolutely nothing to do with sexuality or gender, all sticking rainbows on everything so Stonewall will give them a shiny badge saying what a great place it is to work.
I'm a lawyer and have a lot of lawyer connections on LinkedIn. During Pride Month (Why do they need a month? Women only get a day and even that is hijacked by trans women!) almost every law firm changed its logo and website to rainbow colours. In some cases the change appears to be permanent.
AnnoyedFromSlough · 21/03/2023 12:36
Quote: If you were a Labour voter and your employer offered you a choice of two lanyards, "Vote Tory" or purple, you wouldn't just take the purple one and not give it a second thought.
You'd think, "Wait, why is there a Vote Tory one? What does that have to do with my job? Why is there the option to wear a Vote Tory lanyard but not a Vote Labour one? Will it harm my career prospects if they know I vote Labour?"
Response:
If I worked for an organisation that allied themselves with, for example, the Tory party to the point that they would have a vote Tory lanyard then I would be aware of the affiliation and would just take the purple one. Surely it's unlikely that people working for organisations that promote pride are completely unaware of the fact.
To be quite honest with you, I wouldn't expect any law firm to be plastering everything in rainbows, because it has absolutely nothing to do with what they are paying their staff to do. And given how many of them are now doing this, it really isn't as simple as "go work somewhere else then".
What are you supposed to do? Comb through all their websites to see which ones are rainbow free, apply to all the ones which have job openinbs and then ask them where they stand on rainbows in your interview?
Of course not.
Same goes for loads of other major employers and sectors, like the civil service for example. Try being a civil servant who doesn't pretend to believe in all the gender crap and see what it does to your career.
It's everywhere. And that's why it's a problem.
Stonewall is no longer about gay people. It's run by a bunch of misogynistic bullies who want to erode women's rights. They should have absolutely zero influence over employers, and certainly shouldn't be the arbiters of whether somewhere is an inclusive place to work. If the HR department are shitting rainbows to suck up to Stonewall, it won't be an inclusive place to work for any woman who needs single sex facilities or indeed anyone else with an opposing view.
Rosula · 21/03/2023 13:31
RosaBonheur · 21/03/2023 13:20
How many employers do you think are giving their staff pro life lanyards, and how many employers do you think are giving their staff rainbow ones?
Rosula · 21/03/2023 13:11
WHY do you not accept the simple fact that no-one is making OP or her colleagues wear the rainbow lanyard?
If my employer was offering me a choice between a plain lanyard and a pro life one, they probably wouldn't be my employer - but I would simply opt for the plain one. Even if, like OP, I didn't like it. It's a piece of cord, FFS.
RosaBonheur · 21/03/2023 07:11
Wearing a visible political symbol, not because it is your free choice to do so, but because your employer would like you to do so, when your employer is not a political organisation, should not be part of anyone's job.
Once again, would you be making these arguments if the lanyard had the Conservatuve Party logo on it, or Black Lives Matter, or support for Palestine, or support for Israel, or Mormonism, or pro choice, or pro life, or Manchester United?
You'd be happy to wear a lanyard with any of those things on it even though it has nothing to do with your job? Really?
Rosula · 20/03/2023 23:56
You are so obviously twisting this argument to make a political point. We can all see that the plain lanyard isn't particularly thin, OP doesn't have sensory issues, she doesn't even claim it's uncomfortable. She just says she doesn't like it. There are lots of aspects of working life which people don't like - I don't like the fact that I have to share an office, for instance - but I put up with it because that's what it takes to do the job and get paid. Having to cope with a thinnish lanyard is hardly the most onerous thing anyone has to deal with in order to earn a crust.
RosaBonheur · 20/03/2023 15:47
So you can have a comfortable lanyard if you're willing to publicly dance to Stonewall's tune and an uncomfortable one if you're not?
Riiiight.
Ceryneianhind · 20/03/2023 15:34
I want people to shut the fuck up about their gender identities to be quite honest. I don't care, and I don't want to pretend I do.
I think that message is loud and clear.
The purple lanyard is not thin, and if OP wants to complain about it, thats up to her - but FFS if you do a job with a defined uniform where image is everything, then you have to put up with some discomfort
This reply has been deleted
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What's the relevance of that? You are the one who brought up the possibility of a pro life lanyard. I chose that example because it is one I would find objectionable.
The more material point is that, if everyone is under pressure to support pro life organisations, it is simply not credible that I wouldn't have found out about it before taking a job there. So I wouldn't have taken the job in the first place.
Rosula · 21/03/2023 13:33
What are you supposed to do? Comb through all their websites to see which ones are rainbow free, apply to all the ones which have job openinbs and then ask them where they stand on rainbows in your interview?
Do you not think that you might clock the fact that everyone's wearing rainbow lanyards when you go for the interview?
Jules912 · 21/03/2023 13:38
At my work the lanyard colour is related to your role and which areas you're allowed in unescorted, so you're not allowed your own. Prior to this they did have metal ones but I (and others) asked for an alternative as I'm allergic to whatever metal it was (typically I suspect no one had thought of it as the dress code was stricter then so men, who had to wear shirts, just wore there's over their collar).
AnnoyedFromSlough · 21/03/2023 13:51
RosaBonheur · 21/03/2023 13:26
To be quite honest with you, I wouldn't expect any law firm to be plastering everything in rainbows, because it has absolutely nothing to do with what they are paying their staff to do. And given how many of them are now doing this, it really isn't as simple as "go work somewhere else then".
What are you supposed to do? Comb through all their websites to see which ones are rainbow free, apply to all the ones which have job openinbs and then ask them where they stand on rainbows in your interview?
Of course not.
Same goes for loads of other major employers and sectors, like the civil service for example. Try being a civil servant who doesn't pretend to believe in all the gender crap and see what it does to your career.
It's everywhere. And that's why it's a problem.
Stonewall is no longer about gay people. It's run by a bunch of misogynistic bullies who want to erode women's rights. They should have absolutely zero influence over employers, and certainly shouldn't be the arbiters of whether somewhere is an inclusive place to work. If the HR department are shitting rainbows to suck up to Stonewall, it won't be an inclusive place to work for any woman who needs single sex facilities or indeed anyone else with an opposing view.
AnnoyedFromSlough · 21/03/2023 13:12
It's not true? So who is completely oblivious to their employers support of pride, given that they seem to be very public about it?
RosaBonheur · 21/03/2023 12:59
This just isn't true at all.
There are hundreds and hundreds of employers whose business has absolutely nothing to do with sexuality or gender, all sticking rainbows on everything so Stonewall will give them a shiny badge saying what a great place it is to work.
I'm a lawyer and have a lot of lawyer connections on LinkedIn. During Pride Month (Why do they need a month? Women only get a day and even that is hijacked by trans women!) almost every law firm changed its logo and website to rainbow colours. In some cases the change appears to be permanent.
AnnoyedFromSlough · 21/03/2023 12:36
Quote: If you were a Labour voter and your employer offered you a choice of two lanyards, "Vote Tory" or purple, you wouldn't just take the purple one and not give it a second thought.
You'd think, "Wait, why is there a Vote Tory one? What does that have to do with my job? Why is there the option to wear a Vote Tory lanyard but not a Vote Labour one? Will it harm my career prospects if they know I vote Labour?"
Response:
If I worked for an organisation that allied themselves with, for example, the Tory party to the point that they would have a vote Tory lanyard then I would be aware of the affiliation and would just take the purple one. Surely it's unlikely that people working for organisations that promote pride are completely unaware of the fact.
This whole post has nothing to do with my point.
My point is that people DO know if their employer promotes pride to the extent that they would offer a pride lanyard. Or the Tory party to the point that they would offer a vote Tory one.
And so it wouldn't come as a surprise, as you seem to be suggesting.
I said nothing about vetting employers (although surely most people research the places they have applied for prior to interview anyway?) or going to work elsewhere.
TheHoover · 21/03/2023 13:57
So my point to you Rosabonheur is that you are only objecting because you disagree with the cause (I am not sure anyone would be kicking up a fuss if the the alternative was a mental health awareness lanyard or some other such cause).
You are also only seeing the political aspects to the rainbow flag. Employers who are promoting LGBT rights by using the rainbow flag are doing it in good faith, promoting inclusivity and equality in both employment and the provision of services to L, to G, to B and to T. You can interpret it all you like as willingly or blindingly supporting the insidious erosion of women’s rights or whatever but I can assure you that that there is no political intent to the promotion of the flag and a huge barrel of positive intent which - before the stonewall trans row - was widely accepted.
and also (as many posters passim have revealed) no-one is forcing her to wear it (the suggestion that it is is of course the entire point of this thread)
LookItsMeAgain · 21/03/2023 14:17
I personally hate having to wear a lanyard as I can feel the weight of anything heavier than a thin necklace around my neck and I hate it.
So, when my company introduced retractable badge reels, I took the lanyard off the retractable reel and just attach my staff card to the reel and the reel to a belt loop on my trousers.
Could you use a retractable badge reel instead of a lanyard @Dolphin8765 ?
There are some nice purple ones on Amazon (if you had to stay with a corporate colour)
RosaBonheur · 21/03/2023 14:49
TheHoover · 21/03/2023 13:57
So my point to you Rosabonheur is that you are only objecting because you disagree with the cause (I am not sure anyone would be kicking up a fuss if the the alternative was a mental health awareness lanyard or some other such cause).
You are also only seeing the political aspects to the rainbow flag. Employers who are promoting LGBT rights by using the rainbow flag are doing it in good faith, promoting inclusivity and equality in both employment and the provision of services to L, to G, to B and to T. You can interpret it all you like as willingly or blindingly supporting the insidious erosion of women’s rights or whatever but I can assure you that that there is no political intent to the promotion of the flag and a huge barrel of positive intent which - before the stonewall trans row - was widely accepted.
and also (as many posters passim have revealed) no-one is forcing her to wear it (the suggestion that it is is of course the entire point of this thread)
I don't know how you could possibly have read my posts and come to that conclusion.
I don't think employee lanyards should be promoting any cause. I think it's completely inappropriate. Your employees are not mascots to promote your political beliefs. They are there to work.
The only reason YOU and other posters think it's OK is because you agree with the cause. If your employer was giving you a choice between "Vote Tory" and purple, or "Scientology" and purple, and potentially drawing negative conclusions about you if you choose purple and not their favoured cause, I don't think you'd be so happy about the whole idea.
RosaBonheur · 21/03/2023 14:52
Rosula · 21/03/2023 13:31
What's the relevance of that? You are the one who brought up the possibility of a pro life lanyard. I chose that example because it is one I would find objectionable.
The more material point is that, if everyone is under pressure to support pro life organisations, it is simply not credible that I wouldn't have found out about it before taking a job there. So I wouldn't have taken the job in the first place.
RosaBonheur · 21/03/2023 13:20
How many employers do you think are giving their staff pro life lanyards, and how many employers do you think are giving their staff rainbow ones?
Rosula · 21/03/2023 13:11
WHY do you not accept the simple fact that no-one is making OP or her colleagues wear the rainbow lanyard?
If my employer was offering me a choice between a plain lanyard and a pro life one, they probably wouldn't be my employer - but I would simply opt for the plain one. Even if, like OP, I didn't like it. It's a piece of cord, FFS.
RosaBonheur · 21/03/2023 07:11
Wearing a visible political symbol, not because it is your free choice to do so, but because your employer would like you to do so, when your employer is not a political organisation, should not be part of anyone's job.
Once again, would you be making these arguments if the lanyard had the Conservatuve Party logo on it, or Black Lives Matter, or support for Palestine, or support for Israel, or Mormonism, or pro choice, or pro life, or Manchester United?
You'd be happy to wear a lanyard with any of those things on it even though it has nothing to do with your job? Really?
Rosula · 20/03/2023 23:56
You are so obviously twisting this argument to make a political point. We can all see that the plain lanyard isn't particularly thin, OP doesn't have sensory issues, she doesn't even claim it's uncomfortable. She just says she doesn't like it. There are lots of aspects of working life which people don't like - I don't like the fact that I have to share an office, for instance - but I put up with it because that's what it takes to do the job and get paid. Having to cope with a thinnish lanyard is hardly the most onerous thing anyone has to deal with in order to earn a crust.
RosaBonheur · 20/03/2023 15:47
So you can have a comfortable lanyard if you're willing to publicly dance to Stonewall's tune and an uncomfortable one if you're not?
Riiiight.
Ceryneianhind · 20/03/2023 15:34
I want people to shut the fuck up about their gender identities to be quite honest. I don't care, and I don't want to pretend I do.
I think that message is loud and clear.
The purple lanyard is not thin, and if OP wants to complain about it, thats up to her - but FFS if you do a job with a defined uniform where image is everything, then you have to put up with some discomfort
This reply has been deleted
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It's relevant because it's now pretty difficult to find an employer that isn't Stonewalled to the hilt.
It's easy to find one not promoting a pro life agenda.
TheHoover · 21/03/2023 15:05
And if you think there is "no political intent" to everything being covered in rainbows, you really are astonishingly naive.
Do you think employers are promoting the rainbow flag for political purposes? Please articulate and provide your evidence for that reasoning (Nb I have significant evidence to the contrary)
RosaBonheur · 21/03/2023 15:13
TheHoover · 21/03/2023 15:05
And if you think there is "no political intent" to everything being covered in rainbows, you really are astonishingly naive.
Do you think employers are promoting the rainbow flag for political purposes? Please articulate and provide your evidence for that reasoning (Nb I have significant evidence to the contrary)
I think some of them are promoting it because Stonewall have told them to do so and they want their inclusive employer badge or whatever, because it's easier than actually creating a working environment that is inclusive of everyone. (And Stonewall's intent is clearly political.)
And I think some of them are promoting it because they believe humans can change sex and all that crap, and will not be an inclusive or supportive employer of anyone who doesn't share those beliefs.
The trouble is, it's difficult to tell which it is until there's a row over single sex spaces or something like that.
Neither of those things are good though.
TheHoover · 21/03/2023 15:20
How about they are doing it because homophobia and transphobia is live and kicking. Despite all the gay people you know being well off (or whatever you said upthread).
Nurses, traffic wardens, social workers, housing workers, teachers etc are regularly being spat at, being sworn at and called vile names. Care workers are unable to give personal care and are being told to fuck off and get a straight person to come. Every single day.
This disgusting shit happens EVERY SINGLE DAY. So wearing a badge is to get everyone to realise that this hasn’t gone away, by no means but that the organisation will not stand for it. It’s exactly the same as taking the knee.
MelchiorsMistress · 21/03/2023 15:44
How about they are doing it because homophobia and transphobia is live and kicking.
So is racism and disablesism and plenty of other types of discrimination. There are many many causes in this country that deserve some solidarity and support, but strangely enough, no one is asked to wear a lanyard for them.
PinkSparklyPussyCat · 21/03/2023 15:54
This disgusting shit happens EVERY SINGLE DAY. So wearing a badge is to get everyone to realise that this hasn’t gone away, by no means but that the organisation will not stand for it. It’s exactly the same as taking the knee.
So it's a token. If someone is forced to wear a political symbol then it weakens the message. If a person chooses to wear it it's up to them, it's clearly a cause they believe in, forcing everyone to wear it makes it meaningless.
SerafinasGoose · 21/03/2023 16:08
TheHoover · 21/03/2023 15:20
How about they are doing it because homophobia and transphobia is live and kicking. Despite all the gay people you know being well off (or whatever you said upthread).
Nurses, traffic wardens, social workers, housing workers, teachers etc are regularly being spat at, being sworn at and called vile names. Care workers are unable to give personal care and are being told to fuck off and get a straight person to come. Every single day.
This disgusting shit happens EVERY SINGLE DAY. So wearing a badge is to get everyone to realise that this hasn’t gone away, by no means but that the organisation will not stand for it. It’s exactly the same as taking the knee.
True enough that it hasn't gone away. Ironic and unfortunate though this is, however, there's a significant miasma of homophobia hanging around none other than Stonewall themselves. Even their original founder has distanced himself from his organization for precisely this reason.
TheHoover · 21/03/2023 16:09
So is racism and disablesism and plenty of other types of discrimination. There are many many causes in this country that deserve some solidarity and support, but strangely enough, no one is asked to wear a lanyard for them
There are other lanyards and many other pin badges, symbols, schemes etc. But no such globally recognised emblem as the rainbow. Do people actually think that these organisation’s ED&I strategies are single agenda?
And for god sake no-one is forcing the OP to wear the rainbow lanyard…..the suggestion that she is is about the weakest cause for outrage I’ve seen on here and that’s saying something (but it’s done the trick).
rwalker · 21/03/2023 17:05
This thread has got sidetracked completely
The issue about lanyards supporting causes and the danger it u don’t wear one that supports causes leaving yourself open to being accused of disagreeing with the supported cause
THIS IS NOT THE ISSUE OP HAS
she simply doesn’t like what they have given her and can’t please herself and buy one of her own choice
the fact the company has supported the rainbow is a different issue
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