Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

School coming to home to view sick child - Normal?

719 replies

CandlelightGlow · 16/03/2023 10:59

I'm feeling really sensitive right now due to work stress so please be kind.

My 5 year old is off with chicken pox right now. He got the spots on Sunday, he's been quite poorly with it Monday - Tuesday, very sleepy, then very uncomfortable Weds waiting for the scabs to form. He's just started to feel better today but the school have an INSET day tomorrow anyway.

We just had a knock at the door, and it was a teacher from DS's school! He was very reluctant to come downstairs because he's only in his pants and thought the teacher was there to take him to school. She was very nice and said it's sad that they have to do this in this day and age but it's completely normal and they do it for everyone who's been off this length of time.

He's been off for 4 days? His older sister is at school so we've still done the school run every day. To be fair as it's an inset day tomorrow it will be over a week by the time he goes back on Monday. But I've never had a teacher come unannounced to our house to check on our child. Can someone reassure me it is actually normal and they don't think something bad of us! My poor boy is just ill. I've called him in and updated, updated again this morning saying he would be back on Monday!

OP posts:
CoffeeCakeAndALattePlease · 16/03/2023 11:02

Unusual but not unheard of.
anything else going on in your family which may look like a concern, even if it’s not?

DD teacher called at the door when she had covid. Dropped off a get well soon card from the class…. but that could have just been a gentle way of checking up!

GrasstrackGirl · 16/03/2023 11:03

That's very unusual IMHO.

Flamingogirl08 · 16/03/2023 11:04

Very very unusual I would say

DeflatedAgain · 16/03/2023 11:04

My DS won't be starting school for a while so I don't know for sure but that does not sound right.

I would be very shocked and confused!

Seems very OTT

FannyFifer · 16/03/2023 11:05

I would find that really odd.

goodfriend · 16/03/2023 11:05

it happens

CoffeeCakeAndALattePlease · 16/03/2023 11:05

Maybe have a look at the policy on website if it’s there.

GandhiDeclaredWarOnYou · 16/03/2023 11:06

What is the attendance like for your son and daughter generally?

It sounds like a safeguarding check to me.

Dixiechickonhols · 16/03/2023 11:06

No it’s very odd. Was it definitely a teacher you recognised? Who was covering their class.

YouFilthyAnimal · 16/03/2023 11:06

I’ve never heard of this happening

One of my DC had 4 weeks off with chicken pox last year and we never had anything but a phonecall asking how she was

It seems especially unusual if you still have other children attending school every day
Is his attendance very low?

DrinkFeckArseBrick · 16/03/2023 11:07

Surely this is potentially putting teachers at risk from illness

Plus they're not medically qualified...how are they meant to tell for example the difference between a cough and a severe chest infection, a cold and an ear infection or a sore throat and tonsillitis. How can they judge if a child with a complicated condition flare up is well enough to be in school?

I guess it's a good check that there is nothing else concerning happening at home...but again I'm not sure teachers are the best placed to judge this, given social services can miss things.

Sorry not really answering your question about usual practice!

Newuser82 · 16/03/2023 11:07

I've never known this happen to anyone! Seems very strange. Surely teachers don't have time to go round everyone's house when a child is ill for a few days

Jellycats4life · 16/03/2023 11:07

Very unusual, especially to turn up without a phone call ahead of time.

It sounds like they are acting out of suspicion/safeguarding which sounds quite unwarranted.

My 7yo has had a lot of sickness absence this academic year (all genuine - and he is autistic so has a lot less resilience around things like colds compared with NT kids) and I was half expecting a knock on the door the last time he was ill. But they didn’t, although I would obviously have shown them proof if they had!

springrises · 16/03/2023 11:07

I'd call the school and check that this is their policy, just to make sure this wasn't an overly officious member of staff working outside their remit

Thesearmsofmine · 16/03/2023 11:08

That’s really intrusive and I wouldn’t have made my dc come down to be seen by the teacher.

otherwayup · 16/03/2023 11:08

Are there other concerns about your dd that school have raised?
At my previous school home visits were done if a child with poor attendance or other concerns was absent.
What is your dd's attendance like?

Original poster
CandlelightGlow · 16/03/2023 11:09

GandhiDeclaredWarOnYou · 16/03/2023 11:06

What is the attendance like for your son and daughter generally?

It sounds like a safeguarding check to me.

Very good attendance. DS had 1 day off for an illness and then seemed fine, was asked to pick him up the next day as he was still a bit tired and unwell. That's his only absence this year, DD even less.

I'm really gutted that it is in fact unusual as I suspected, we're a lower income family in an area with high-ish income and we live out of catchment so sometimes since DS started we are sometimes slightly late (still before 9am though).

OP posts:
AviMav · 16/03/2023 11:10

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Hoppinggreen · 16/03/2023 11:10

I had 10 years of Primary school altogether and this never happened to us, despite DD getting every bug going, breaking her ankle in Y1 and having asthma

viques · 16/03/2023 11:10

It seems unusual. I wonder if someone has made a “comment” and they are following it up. Have you been outside with DS in the last few days?

MedievalNun · 16/03/2023 11:10

that sounds a bit weird to me too. A friend's children have very, very poor attendance and no teacher has called; as others have said check that it it is actually school policy and not someone over-stepping, especially as you've kept them updated

Beginningless · 16/03/2023 11:10

That is unusual, when I worked with vulnerable kids I’d have loved teachers to check on kids who needed it but that never happened! I mean this kindly, but since you’re stressed do you think they could think you need some support for any reason?

Original poster
CandlelightGlow · 16/03/2023 11:11

Thesearmsofmine · 16/03/2023 11:08

That’s really intrusive and I wouldn’t have made my dc come down to be seen by the teacher.

I was actually in a meeting on Teams at the time, DS was very reluctant to go downstairs (as said, he wasn't dressed due to spots, and thought the teacher was there to take him to school so panicked).

My DP said he's here and fine but doesn't want to come down, teacher responded with "I need to have eyes on him"

WTAF. I'm devastated.

OP posts:
Hoppinggreen · 16/03/2023 11:12

CandlelightGlow · 16/03/2023 11:09

Very good attendance. DS had 1 day off for an illness and then seemed fine, was asked to pick him up the next day as he was still a bit tired and unwell. That's his only absence this year, DD even less.

I'm really gutted that it is in fact unusual as I suspected, we're a lower income family in an area with high-ish income and we live out of catchment so sometimes since DS started we are sometimes slightly late (still before 9am though).

Show quote history

I doubt it’s your income, mostly likely to be the persistent lateness.
We lived out of catchment and DS was still there on time, are there reasons why you are often late?

TheYearOfSmallThings · 16/03/2023 11:13

It definitely wouldn't happen around here (London).