Asking staff to rinse toddler plate

[leggingsandasweatshirt]

I am extremely hormonal so potentially being unreasonable, but interested to see if others think this is a reasonable request or if I am over stepping:

We were out for lunch today and I brought a suction plate for DS (almost 2) because he is likely to launch a regular plate. When we'd finished I realised I'd run out of nappy bags so didn't have anything to put the dirty plate in inside my bag.

I explained this to the waitress and apologised for being a pain and asked if it was possible for someone to give it a quick rinse so I could put it in my bag without covering everything in gravy.

She looked at me like I'd just shit on the table and responded she was trying to clear the plates. I was mortified that I had clearly offended her and said it didn't matter. My step mum then suggested I rinse the plate in the sink in the toilet which I hadn't thought of, so I then went and did that.

I have asked restaurants to do this on occasion before - am I being an entitled wanker or is this a reasonable request?!

I always have wipes with me if we're out for a while, in case we do a nappy change (appreciate this might be different if yours is potty trained!) I used to wipe his plastic bowl clean when he was younger before putting it in my bag but he just uses a normal plate now (just turned 2).

I don't think it would occur to me to ask the staff to rinse it.

I also wouldn't do it in a bathroom sink - probably just me but I think it's a bit gross!

It's an
odd request on a Sunday afternoon in a busy family friendly pub. The waitresses job is to take your orders, relay to chef, bring your meals to table and take away empties. She's highly unlikely to have the time or authority to start doing washing up. I can't believe you wouldn't have thought of the bathroom. OK not ideal but easily done.
I don't think you offended anyone. I think she's was essentially saying What would you ask me that for.
Let it go...and don't forget your bag in future.

'Well disciplined' because they don't launch plates?

Oh you poor sweet Summer child 😂😂😂

No it would not have taken 2 secs or even 2 mins. I'd imagine servers do not go into the kitchen. I'd also imagine they have a system for pot washing and it's an inconvenience for someone to a waitress to desert her duties and go and push in to wash one plate.

This made me laugh. Thank you 😂.

They should but don't always as they're their own people and also children. I have 2 daughters and raised them the exact same really but one was an angel and was hardly ever naughty while the other was a big crier and threw things all the time. Each child is different.

YABU to take a known plate launcher amongst other diners.

I think that's why she brought the suction plate...so he wouldn't throw plates at anyone and other diners would be at peace

Yes, Like I said then, a concentration camp! FYI our children should’ve fear us.
If you think a child at that age throwing is bad discipline you have no idea about child development.

I think YWBU to ask but I wouldn't have thought about the toilet sink either!

🤣🤣🤣

Actually this is a pretty balanced post. You forgot your bag so asked without considering the logistics. Fine. She declined. Fine
Let it go.

Yanbu

Oh fgs letting your young child do whatever they want is worse than not teaching them from a young age about what is and isn’t socially acceptable behaviour. Doing that isn’t running a concentration camp. Some people have such low expectations of their own ability as parents. Toddlers are unpredictable and no one expects perfect behaviour all the time but it’s bonkers to expect a 2.5 year old or older cannot learn they are not allowed to throw a plate.

To be honest, I wouldn't ask someone in a restaurant to do this - I'd use a wet wipe, a tissue or take it to the loo and wipe it out there. Ultimately you just need the food wiped off and then you can wash it at home.

I'd have asked for a napkin/paper towel in any other circumstance where I didn't have a wet wipe, tissue and bathrooms were unavailable but I wouldn't ask a waitress to wash my kids plate and bring it back.

However, I don't think someone asking is the crime of the year and had I'd been your waitress (which I did many many years ago) I'd have said I can give it a wipe down in the kitchen/behind the bar and I wouldn't have thought you were a dickhead for asking.

The child isn’t even two yet! Do you need me to read it to you?

The request sounds reasonable except 1. The waiter was probably surprised as it's not something I would think happens often and 2. They probably can't take items into the kitchen from outside for hygiene reasons. In the future I would simply wipe in down with a napkin

Ah OK. Well in that that your not being unreasonable.

• in that case

It’s not unreasonable to ask and it’s not unreasonable to say no. It’s a bit dependent on the situation maybe. You explained you had been caught out and acknowledged it was a PITA request and it may well have been a particularly busy shift.

They needn’t have had a face on about it but it’s just a little awkward interaction that seem a million times more likely when you have children 😆

Some of the nastiness in the thread is beyond unreasonable though. Judgy, shamey comments aren’t helpful and are not a good colour on anyone.

So???? What about that negates your points about ‘concentration camp’ (incredibly ill judged phrasing btw, telling a child NO isn’t in anyway comparable, but you know that) parenting??

YABU, the fact that you didn’t think to go and do it yourself in the toilets shows a level of entitlement (even if unconscious) over serving staff which is unpleasant. I’m glad she didn’t agree.

You do know a toddler is a kid aged from 1-3yrs old.....right?

Yes a 3yr old may know not to throw/drop a plate but a 1yr old?? How do you enforce discipline on a 1yr old exactly?