WIU not to give her another banana?

[isurvived3under2]

DD is nearly 5. Tonight she asked for a banana after dinner, which I said she could have. 5 minutes later she asked for another banana. I enquired what had happened to the first banana, she said she had changed her mind and had put it in the bin. But then she changed her mind again and indeed wanted a banana.

WIU to say no to a second banana, let her cry for 20 minutes and send her to bed with a 'rumbly tummy'?

The fact that people think it’s harsh uk be annoyed at a 5 year old throwing a banana in the bin and then asking for another one is ‘harsh’ probably explains a lot about the world these days.

She knew she was being naughty. Asking for a banana, opening it, not eating it and chucking it in the bin is bad enough. But then to ask for a replacement… 5 is not too old to be told that’s not ok.

I doubt she was actually hungry anyway.

Cringe

You misquoted me. I said not pandering to a not hungry child. She wasn't actually hungry so didn't need the banana.

Wouldn't they just!

Bloody keyboard warrior.

Nice cut and paste job of the sentence “not pandering to a not-at-all hungry child” there.

So she must have been 'taught' to throw it away?! You cannot be serious.

FWIW OP I would have done the same.

I don't think a 5 year old needs to eat cereal after just finishing a full meal with dessert! Unless you want them to be obese by the time they're a teenager?
Most cereal contains way too much sugar... it's like broken up cookies in a bowl with milk poured over. People kid themselves that it's healthy.

There's only one cunt here and it's not OP. you sound so cunty that you're probably smothered in Canesten. @RobertaFirmino sorry if you have thrush and hope it’s cured soon

ps yes that’s pretty embarrassing

No wonder there's an obesity crisis in this country blah blah blah

Of course she was! If not she would have abandoned it wherever it was after she licked it!

I am astounded by the responses saying you were unreasonable.

i just think most parents seem to think their child is starving. But then I am of the opinion that there’s no alternatives to the dinner I provide - unless it truly is not child friendly (ie. Spicy.)

she will not starve and if she does go to bed slightly hungry, she will have learnt to not throw away food that she wants. She’s 5, she’s not an unreasonable toddler. And she will live another day.

she will not starve and if she does go to bed slightly hungry, she will have learnt to not throw away food that she wants. She’s 5, she’s not an unreasonable toddler. And she will live another day.

@Whenwilliberich if you change your mind on something you want to eat do you go to bed hungry? Or eat something you don’t want? I hate the fact people don’t realise kids are humans and humans without the frontal cortex development of adults that allows for good decision making

I agree with you on fishing food out of the bin (what sort of message does that send?!) and on hunger. Though, it's clear she wasn't hungry.

Seems to me the difference between a five-year-old and an adult changing their mind about food is that adults are not (one hopes) learning about where food comes from. A five year old is still learning. As an adult, you know that if you keep throwing away food you don't fancy, then regretting it, pretty soon you'll end up with no food in the house, or a completely skewed food budget. As a child, if you throw away a banana and then immediately mummy finds you another one when you ask, you'll naturally assume this is how it works.

That's why loads of posters, including me, reckon you could find a middle ground by offering some alternative, ideally not very exciting but perfectly decent, food. A child who is genuinely hungry and has really made a mistake will eat the alternative food. A child who is spinning out bedtime/angling for something more fun will not.

It's not their fault. They're not being manipulative or deliberately wasteful or anything like this. In the same way, saying 'no, there you can't have a banana, you put it in the bin' isn't a punishment - it's just how it is.

This

YWNBU. I'd have done exactly the same as you did.

A one off I would explain and give another, not again though

She was not “naughty” 🙄

Um ... surely she will have been taught to throw away things that are finished with/rubbish? At 5, she probably isn't still licking things and putting them down. You are thinking of a younger child.

Surely by not letting her have another banana, that is exactly what the OP is trying to teach her...?

DS2 (3 1/2y)wouldn't eat the tangerine he asked for tonight but wanted a different one " 'cos this one doesn't like me". Had a little sobbing session when we said no. DH ate it which caused tears to fall onto the table and then DS2 decided he didn't want another one after all.

I still would have got it out of the bin. Given it a wash under the tap and given to her. I can’t stand food waste. There’s no way she’d have been given a new one.

Keep in mind not everyone's bins are the same - you're thinking of a compost bin with nothing nastier in it than maybe some slightly 'off' veg. But I've lived in areas where you put everything including meat into the same bin that goes off to be heat-treated and composted. You couldn't put a banana in a bin with off meat and then fish it out and wash it.

These comments have made me laugh. Tell her not to do it again and give her the banana next time.

I'd say no too. I'd not offer her anything else either. She had her meal and decided to through banana into the bin. She will learn from to this and not do it again.

’DH’ has dinner 5-5:30 bath around six, in bed for a story and a cup of milk around 6:40, teeth brushed, lights out by seven.

You run a tight ship 😂