DH and his big washing day…

[99problemsincludinghavingteenagedaughters]

Family of 5 for context.

DH doesn’t often do a wash (unless he needs something specific for work) that’s my department, no moans on this as DH does other stuff and with 3 DD’s has no idea what belongs to who.

DH does sometimes have a flurry of excitement that he must take over the washing and prove that it’s not as hard as it looks and insists that he is being very helpful.

Yesterdays flurry came off the back of our tumble dryer not working and quite a back log of washing to get through and a work day at home for him.

Credit where credits due he did get the tumble dryer working and I left for work with with his 1st load on…

Skip 8 hours to me getting back from work and I came back to what can only be described as an old laundry, there were clothes everywhere, on radiators (fine) on back of chairs, up the bannisters, over the top of drawers, and doors we also discovered that DH isn’t particularly good at telling the difference from loads that are dry or damp and had piles of clothes everywhere from the tumble dryer. I bit my tongue though even when DD1 moaned about all her damp Nike socks and DH told her to hang around her bunk bed!!

It came to a head this morning when DH obviously very delighted with his successful washing day (as I couldn’t find a fucking thing and had girls moaning that all their tights were damp and found my makeup bag under a dumped white wash on the floor) asked if I had any dark things as he was putting on another wash before we left for work and I truly lost my shit with him.

Apparently the way I wash isn’t fast enough his way is much better and I should be grateful.

AIBU to think what he is is doing is not “doing a wash” putting it in the machine and half drying it and leaving it in mixed damp piles all over the house for me to sort is not at all fucking helpful and further more illogical as most of it will end up smelling and need to be rewashed.

My DH, tries his best but he really needs to step away from any drying! Washing he has mastered, even splitting loads, but he just doesn't grasp the concept of a flick!

Crumpled, half inside half not clothes will take ages to dry either on a line, in a tumble dryer or on a dryer. I've given up on him and are concentrating on the DSs.

He does have many other redeeming features so I will keep him for now

Fair division of housework does not always mean splitting every task 50/50.
Sometimes whole tasks can be done by one person, makes better sense and is still fair.
I do all the laundry, I enjoy it, I have a system that works and I don't want anyone else to "help".

Mine likes to remove my wet items from the airer and replace them with his own, telling me he “though they were dry” when I come across a damp pile of my clothes dumped on the ironing board.

Interesting, thank you. My mother and grandmothers starch/ed/ bed linen, teatowels and non-terry towels. To keep the dirt out for longer.
My mother remembers with horror that my grandmother told her that her mother wouldnt wash bedlinen over the winter at all. I guess it maked sense not to do big laundry in freezing temperatures and snow back in the 1910s-1920s.

This is EXACTLY what my husband does and it boils my blood

Think I'll get some of that starch spray. Did not know it helped prevent stains. Mumsnet is so educational :)

Apologies but this did make me giggle, only because my DH is useless in similar ways so I can relate. The part where he advised your DD to hang her socks on her bed made me laugh… He got the tumble dryer working but still hung everything all over the house? Bit weird.

A load of washing is:
Sort it
Wash It
Dry it (properly, whatever the method)
Put it away neatly. In our house I will put away his pants and socks but not anything else. Teenager has her own method. DH puts away nothing of mine, but sorts and folds so I can do this easily.

If he's missing steps he's hindering rather than helping.

I couldn't help but think of this thread this morning after having a giggle at it the other week as it's exactly the sort of thing my DH would do and expect congratulation/appreciation/a medal for! And sure enough...

Yesterday evening DH returned home from a networking/activity day e-biking. His biking get-up was filthy, smelly and covered in mud. He announced he was going to do a 'sports wash' so basically his biking stuff, and his and DS's football stuff from the previous day. We tend to use a different detergent for this stuff as our usual Persil tabs often don't get the sweaty smell out.

Anyway, firstly he took my damp washing out of the machine and just left it in a bag. Then he had to do his wash twice because the first time he put the detergent in the conditioner drawer. Then he left it in the drum overnight and put it up this morning.

He removed ALL of my still-damp washing from the clothes horse to make way for his approximately 10 items of clothing which was spread haphazardly over the entire rack (which is generally designed to hold at least two loads of washing). He dumped said still-damp clothing on the bed (clothes horse is in the spare room) and on top of a bag of actual dry washing that I was planning to put away this morning. He made a very half-hearted attempt at folding a few items and pairing socks up, but as they were still damp it was completely pointless!

I've spent flipping ages this morning sorting out damp clothes from dry clothes (including some that had been dry but were now damp after having damp clothes dumped on top!) and re-hanging them on the clothes horse as well as rearranging his own hanging effort. And then finally getting the dry clothes away.

I had a go at him (in slight exasperated humour) and he went on the defensive claiming that he was "just trying to be helpful"!

Dear lord. I admit that the laundry gets on top of me sometimes (3 DC) and it's my least favourite chore (the putting away bit) and often wish I had more help with it, but it was a reminder to be careful what I wish for!

Just to add before anyone jumps on it, DH more than pulls his weight in other ways...cooking, washing up, cleaning, gardening, childcare and taxi driver, but he is crap when it comes to laundry!

I was married to the same man as you all are but then I got divorced. Due to certain financial problems I told him to come home. Separate bedrooms. Now he does everything. Wash, dries, folds and puts away. All because I.have a very bad back.

just got home after putting a wash on before i left
dh was sorting in, before he put in on the line!
so smalls near the top of the basket
i had to stop myself from commenting!