To think we shouldn’t leave kids unsupervised while in bed

[Namechange12908]

…early in the morning. At what age would you do this? DC are 7 and 4 and will happily watch TV/play after breakfast. Kids wake up quite early (6-7ish), and at a weekend DH an I take turns at lie in, the other gets up with the kids. If it’s DH's turn to get up he will usually happily come back to bed for an hour after making them breakfast. He says he will hear if they start fighting or they come find him if they need anything. I would love to do the same but I don’t feel comfortable leaving them unsupervised.IABU?

Totally fine at that age.

I find it weird that different rules seem to apply on here if it's the morning.

I personally wouldn't leave an under 5 unsupervised - which I would define as being alone in the house or when a parent was properly asleep. (Dozing, drinking coffee in bed etc is different).

I would be a bit more comfortable with it if they were just in their own room - mine have gro clocks and potter around until the sun comes up - because a) their rooms are child proofed and b) they aren't eating so no risk of choking. The rest of our house is fairly child proof but I don't see how anyone can have a totally child proofed kitchen, things like the oven and toaster for example.

I plan to wait till mine are 7 and 5 before starting this.

I have a lot of sympathy with tiredness from early wakings but tbh 6/7 doesn't seem that early to me any more..

I went back to bed this morning and left my 3 year old to play (have done this since he was maybe 2 and a half). He can easily entertain himself and we don’t have any stairs. The kitchen and bathroom have stair gates so he only really plays in his room or the living room. If he wants anything he will come and knock my door but I can hear him anyway as it’s an apartment and all on one floor. Not that it happens a lot anyway.

@TimeforacuppaT I think house layout and similar make a big difference. My younger one could climb over stairgates very early (18 months, I think) so there's no keeping them out of the kitchen and the acoustics of our house mean we can't really hear the kids downstairs.

I think also for me personally, I don't really like or get much out of dozing, if I can't go to sleep properly because I am keeping an ear out for the kids, I would rather just be up

If your kids are able to do this stuff independently, make the absolute most of it!

My perspective: I’ve got a ND 6-year-old who sleeps in my bed, wakes up at 5, and insists I accompany him everywhere at all times, including to the toilet. If I had a lie-in until 7 followed by his sorting his own breakfast and amusing himself for a bit I’d think I’d died and gone to heaven! 😂

7 and 4 fine to do this. I have a 7, 5 and nearly 2 year old, the older 2 can get up by themselves, get a snack etc if they need to. Nearly 2 year old we obviously can't just let him roam so one of us has to get up with him. By 4 I'd happily let them go downstairs, especially with an older sibling.

Mine go down on their own sometimes but I don't go back to sleep, so I can listen out if they start squabbling.

Yeah my 6 and 4 year olds happily get up and play for a hour in the morning. The older one can turn the telly on and operate Disney+/Netflix and they can both make cereal or bread and butter or help themselves to croissants/ fruit.

They either watch telly or make elaborate games involving 3 million dolls/ teddies. I think it's actually their favourite part of the week.

I am no more worried about the 4 year old choking than the 6 year old, she's not a baby she's in reception at school, capable of feeding and dressing herself.

I was always up before the kids because I always made them a hot breakfast and a cup of tea.
I hate lazy parents, get your arse out of bed. You had kids, see to them.
No reason to be idling in bed at that time.

Definitely-and you should not be going to sleep either, who knows what might happen?

Choking isn't just a thing babies do. You are advised to be careful with under 4s eating alone.

I don't supervise my 3.5 year old 100% of the time eating but I wouldn't want him regularly eating without an adult present

www.stanfordchildrens.org/en/topic/default?id=tips-to-lower-toddlers-choking-risks-1-24081#:~:text=Protect%20your%20child%20by%20making,he%20or%20she%20is%20eating.

My elder two are almost 3 and almost 5, and I think nearly at the stage where I could do this. Downstairs is very child-proofed. I’d hear if they did anything like unlock the front door or hurt themself and they’d know exactly where to find me. The only thing putting me off at the moment is that I couldn’t totally trust that the almost 5 year old would be fair to her sister with shared resources etc.

Mine are 3 and 6 and I don't like them downstairs by themselves.

No problem with them playing in their bedrooms though.

"Idling in bed at that time"

6am on a weekend?

7 and 4?! Jesus. Have a lie in. Set them up a low cupboard with plastic bowls and some brioches or cereals and let them sort themselves out.

You’re mugging yourself out of a lie in.

I used to decant milk into a little jug for them when they were tiny. Sounds fussy I guess, but it literally took about 5 seconds.

I have lockable cages in the living room in front of the TV for this reason. Quick 5 minute job and back to bed 👍🏻

My children would genuinely love this.

I wouldn’t let them get there own breakfast but then we had a extended family members child choke on toast age 4 and was being supervised sadly child now late teens with a catastrophic brain injury

Screens were not about when ds was young to stick him in front of other than TV and that wouldn't keep him entertained for more than a few minutes at time so we had to actually get up and parent him.

We did lots of early morning walks when parks were not as busy, did Sunday morning baking, early morning shop so afternoons were free for something else etc. Although it was sometimes difficult getting up after a long week working FT, in hindsight they are precious memories and were intrinsic in ds's development to the person he is today.

If you need more sleep get to your bed earlier and get up and spend time doing things with your kids, especially if you work all week, they don't stay this young for long.

We learned the hard way, to use a stair gate to keep the early-riser under fives corraled upstairs within earshot of our bedroom.

If you're in bed, they are downstairs and you can't hear them...it's because the ringleader of the crime syndicate told them "Sh, they'll hear us".

They will be fine

I do this with dd almost 6

She either goes to grab some breakie and takes to her room

Or I leave some cereal and raisins in a pot with a brioche when I go to bed

She doesn't like milk on cereal

She has a tv with firestick to limited to Disney ceebeebies and kids tube

Or plays with toys

When I had my leg in plaster for 3w I literally wasn't allowed to weight bear so slept on the sofa as couldn't do stairs

She had to be quite independent in helping myself to food. Getting dressed /uniform out etx

It's good for them to build dependence up

Of course not. One eye open at all times! Put apple air tags on them too!

I've been doing it since 4 and 7, they stay in their room with iPads and a breakfast I leave next to they door. Getting lie ins after all the waking through the night and 5am starts was IMMENSE 😆

Oh yes, I’m sure you got up every single morning to make them a hot breakfast. Probably pop tarts.