Very rude school admin, not sure what to do

Notbeinfunnehbut · 2023-02-25T16:26:30+00:00

The school admin at my child’s school is known for being quite abrupt and at times quite rude, In fairness 80% of time she’s ok it’s just that 20 % where she’s out of line I rang up a day late for sorting something, I did say sorry I didn’t see the message till this morning I had a sick child off the previous day which she’s well aware of and genuinely didn’t see it i got, no I did send it I sent it yesterday and I sent one Tuesday , I responded I didn’t suggest you didn’t send on those days I’m simply saying I didn’t see it until today, if no slots are left it is what it is, i got told she really could have done with me ringing the day before as now it’s caused a lot of messing about for her and all the teachers ( my child only has one teacher? 😐) and maybe I should have a think about what im doing and actually bothering reading my messages and making sure not to waste other peoples time because I haven’t made a point of checking my messages? I said at that point very restrained (was furious 😡) your perfectly aware I had a sick child yesterday and I apologised for the inconvenience Continued to rant at me in a very patronising and rude manner , I did say thankyou , which I’m annoyed at wish I’d stood up for myself more I’m not great at it , there’s parents she wouldn’t have dared do that too, However it’s still bothering me, I can’t really complain phone or email, either as I have to get passed her first to speak to school (which she’s obviously probably aware of) so I’m just stuck with all this rage with nowhere to go, it’s obviously indefensible behaviour I’m so angry that I apologised and the inconvenience was minor it was typing my name into an excel spreadsheet into an already available slot ,the unprofessional behaviour took up more time that the action itself , but I apologised and said thankyou I’m so annoyed at myself aswell. Im not sure how to proceed with this, it’s not ok to speak to people like that.

SomePeopleAreJustBloodyStupid · 25/02/2023 16:27

Report her to the head teacher

Flickfifo · 25/02/2023 16:28

Has any other parent expressed similar experience?

how long have you been at the school?

Sirikit · 25/02/2023 16:30

If she's normally OK, perhaps she was feeling really stressed and having a bad day? I'd suggest k*lling her with kindness; it's always a good thing to be on friendly terms with administrators, receptionists etc. and to bear in mind they are often underappreciated and receive a lot of snash.

Flickfifo · 25/02/2023 16:31

going by the other threads you have started about this school… it would seem you aren’t happy with a lot

Original poster

Notbeinfunnehbut · 25/02/2023 16:37

Flickfifo · 25/02/2023 16:28

Has any other parent expressed similar experience?

how long have you been at the school?

Oh yes there are quite a few parents who have had run ins , like I said she’s well known

years, I’ve had 3 kids through there

thing is , as I said to someone, could you imagine if that had been my first experience of her ?

OP posts:

Original poster

Notbeinfunnehbut · 25/02/2023 16:42

Sirikit · 25/02/2023 16:30

If she's normally OK, perhaps she was feeling really stressed and having a bad day? I'd suggest k*lling her with kindness; it's always a good thing to be on friendly terms with administrators, receptionists etc. and to bear in mind they are often underappreciated and receive a lot of snash.

I appreciate your intention saying that but I would just appear more a doormat and it would just be a green light for the behaviour

OP posts:

AllWorkYoPlait · 25/02/2023 16:44

Email the head or someone suitably senior. Our senior leadership emails are on the school website.

Flickfifo · 25/02/2023 16:46

Op you’ve had serious issues with your son’s teacher, the way the school does sports day, the assistant head, the schools dealings with ND children.. endless stream of threads conveying unhappiness with this school! 😐

Sirikit · 25/02/2023 16:48

Notbeinfunnehbut · 25/02/2023 16:42

I appreciate your intention saying that but I would just appear more a doormat and it would just be a green light for the behaviour

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The thing is, done correctly, it would preclude any further bad behaviour - she's never going to be rude to someone who is overtly, consistently nice to her. Trust me, it works every time! Some of the trickiest receptionists are now my sworn friends.

AllWorkYoPlait · 25/02/2023 16:49

I wouldn't kill with kindness. That's a cop out. I'm an EA and if I spoke like that to people for no good reason I'd be disciplined.

I only get tetchy with internal people who are mithering me or very rude externals (which I thankfully don't face often). I'm sure working in school admin is dire (I used to work in medical), but that doesn't make it OK to be rude. If the conversation went as you say then she's highly unprofessional.

Sirikit · 25/02/2023 16:49

Flickfifo · 25/02/2023 16:46

Op you’ve had serious issues with your son’s teacher, the way the school does sports day, the assistant head, the schools dealings with ND children.. endless stream of threads conveying unhappiness with this school! 😐

Hmmm... perhaps the problem lies elsewhere 🤔

AllWorkYoPlait · 25/02/2023 16:51

If you do have 1000 problems with the school though, either the school is absolute shit or you're that parent. Only you know the truth.

Sirikit · 25/02/2023 16:51

AllWorkYoPlait · 25/02/2023 16:49

I wouldn't kill with kindness. That's a cop out. I'm an EA and if I spoke like that to people for no good reason I'd be disciplined.

I only get tetchy with internal people who are mithering me or very rude externals (which I thankfully don't face often). I'm sure working in school admin is dire (I used to work in medical), but that doesn't make it OK to be rude. If the conversation went as you say then she's highly unprofessional.

It's not a cop out if it works and adds to the sum of positivity in the world! But some people would rather stand on principle even if it brings further negativity. No wonder so many of you are cross on a daily basis.

Flickfifo · 25/02/2023 16:52

Sirikit · 25/02/2023 16:49

Hmmm... perhaps the problem lies elsewhere 🤔

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The op has a catalogue of complaints against pretty much every dimension of the school!

Sirikit · 25/02/2023 16:53

Flickfifo · 25/02/2023 16:52

The op has a catalogue of complaints against pretty much every dimension of the school!

Show quote history

Ah... that would explain things!

Liorae · 25/02/2023 16:53

It sounds like you are THAT mother.

Hillrunning · 25/02/2023 16:54

In these situations I just don't engage with the comments. So once you had expalin3d once and apologised once then just not offer more.

You: sorry I didn’t see the message till this morning, can I book x slot please?

Her: I sent messages before and this is going to cause lots of problems.

You: Thanks for booking it for me.

Her: You should really think about what you are doing blah blah blah.

You: So is that all booked now? Any other details you need from me?

Flickfifo · 25/02/2023 16:55

On the basis of the history

I feel much sympathy for this school administrator!

Stellaris22 · 25/02/2023 16:56

Perhaps the school had been made aware of you in this instance and how difficult you are. They might just be fed up of time wasting and constant complaints/issues.

As for being 'well aware' of a sick child, it's a school, yours isn't the only child so why would they focus completely on you and your child?

SlashBeef · 25/02/2023 16:56

Flickfifo · 25/02/2023 16:46

Op you’ve had serious issues with your son’s teacher, the way the school does sports day, the assistant head, the schools dealings with ND children.. endless stream of threads conveying unhappiness with this school! 😐

Ah, this makes sense. We all know that parent.

mbosnz · 25/02/2023 16:57

I'm a receptionist (not school), and my job is not to scold and berate our people. If I'm fucked off with a dickhead, my job is to be as nice as pie, without being a doormat, to facilitate their request if reasonable, to politely tell them to fuck off if not (while apologising for not being able to do so). If I want to bitch and moan about said patron, I do that on my own time, and outside of the hearing of other interested parties.

I get fed up with receptionists who think they are the lynch pin of the business, and entitled to treat others however the fuck they like.

Sirikit · 25/02/2023 17:00

mbosnz · 25/02/2023 16:57

I'm a receptionist (not school), and my job is not to scold and berate our people. If I'm fucked off with a dickhead, my job is to be as nice as pie, without being a doormat, to facilitate their request if reasonable, to politely tell them to fuck off if not (while apologising for not being able to do so). If I want to bitch and moan about said patron, I do that on my own time, and outside of the hearing of other interested parties.

I get fed up with receptionists who think they are the lynch pin of the business, and entitled to treat others however the fuck they like.

I think I love you 😍. The time and effort I've invested in buttering up tricky receptionists!!

Original poster

Notbeinfunnehbut · 25/02/2023 17:01

Flickfifo · 25/02/2023 16:46

Op you’ve had serious issues with your son’s teacher, the way the school does sports day, the assistant head, the schools dealings with ND children.. endless stream of threads conveying unhappiness with this school! 😐

What is your point exactly?

are parents not allowed to have any opinion on aspects

if never be rude in to life to any of them

I don’t really ever complain to the school , extremely rare
I’d rather field opinions online than go in guns blazing irl

not everyone is blessed with a fantastic catchment area and school

OP posts:

saltwater1985 · 25/02/2023 17:05

She was an arse.
Moaning to us won't change anything.
If you want something to change- go ahead and do it

Sugargliderwombat · 25/02/2023 17:06

mbosnz · 25/02/2023 16:57

I'm a receptionist (not school), and my job is not to scold and berate our people. If I'm fucked off with a dickhead, my job is to be as nice as pie, without being a doormat, to facilitate their request if reasonable, to politely tell them to fuck off if not (while apologising for not being able to do so). If I want to bitch and moan about said patron, I do that on my own time, and outside of the hearing of other interested parties.

I get fed up with receptionists who think they are the lynch pin of the business, and entitled to treat others however the fuck they like.

Their job is to help organise the school admin so that it runs nice and smoothly, not to please and pander to parents 😬 . By the way schools arent businesses but our office staff are lynch pins, nothing would happen without their hard work!