Tedious performative under eaters

[SlimPig]

The thread about the PIL's measly portions reminded me of this, and how iritating it is. I remember once at work they bought us all fish and chips on one friday afternoon. When it arrived the two other women started their bs as soon as they were handed their box - oohh the weight of that! I'll never eat all that! Hadn't even opened it and looked at it yet.

Then, once opened, both of them, oh my god, I'll never eat all that (measly takeaway cardboard box portion, not a massive, in paper, large portion) ooh dear, we won't need dinner, or breakfast tomorrow now will we! Don't think I can eat my peas too, I'm so stuffed. I'm going to need to go for two runs tomorrow now! On and on, through the whole meal.

I was starving and had to make a conscious effort to eat it slowly because they were fucking about and pushing it round the box and I didn't want to look a pig, I'm a fast eater anyway, but that meal was just so god awful! In the end I just ate it at my normal speed.

Why? Why do people do this? Why can't they just eat their food normally? Why does everything have to be justified and offset? Just strikes me as so sad that they couldn't just eat their food without a whole performance (infront of all the men in the office, only 3 women there, me and them) of how birdlike they normally eat 😥

I have a relative with a history of disordered eating. Not her fault, I know, but not mine either.

We never eat with her now, but once, years ago, out for a family meal, the dessert menu came round. She asked if I was having a dessert and I said I might have a tiramasu.

She widened her eyes, smiled and gasped, "A whole one?"

I was fat at the time already so frankly I didn't feel I had anything to lose and I would rather have stayed fat forever than play her shitty games. So even though I hadn't decided at that point, I decided then. I just looked at her, said "Yes", ordered it and ate it. She flapped around a bit about how she was too full and I just replied, "That's a shame, I'm not, this is delicious."

Never got any shit from her again, which did actually surprise me.

And I'm not trying to say I'm a competitive undereater. I just eat what I can or take a small portion and don't go on about it like DM does. That's the main difference with us with it.

My DH does this - he wants a slither of this, or a bite off my plate, or he’ll cut an apple and eat a tiny slice of it and leave the rest on the table. It’s annoying enough but then he tries to push the rest onto me when I am trying to lose weight!

Luckily my family are all hearty eaters, I love eating and anything to do with food

@WinterLobelia fucking hell!!! What an awful person

I like to explain to people like this that my Dessert Stomach is not full. 😬

You did a mindfulness exercise.

So what?

It's a deliberate attempt to shame other women. Never underestimate the extent to which women will go to make other women look bad

Well that goes both ways. The derogatory comments on here about when women eat a lot or a little are awful.

Plop?

Is that you?

🤣Hilarious. I think I’d be tempted to go the other way and extol the wonders of the cake or whatever else is on offer and make quite a song and dance about how yummy it all is and how I’m going to have seconds 🙂

That's pretty good. I can say I have four stomachs like a cow and soon I'll be chewing the cud.

My sister, also a bit of a competitive undereater although she'd eat in secret, once stayed with her. I only got the stories second hand from each of them but fuck I wish I'd seen it. Apparently there was a scene at breakfast over who could cut a Weetabix into the smallest portion.

I have another gripe on this, my DS always says he doesn't want dessert or even coffee, and then mine arrives, he leans over pops his spoon in and basically half of it has gone or been drunk! He is 30! Its become a but of a family joke now, but I no longer order desserts as I wont get it anyway if he is with us at the meal :)

I have one friend who always watches everyone eating, like hawk, to ensure that she is eating less than anyone else. If it's just the two of us out together, she tries to force more food on me so that she doesn't feel bad about eating more. On a couple of occasions when I've been trying to lose weight (I'm a size 22, she's a 12 and big-boned), I have lost it with her. Things like 'do you want another half bread roll, I can't it two?' to which I replied 'why don't you just leave what you can't eat' which pisses her off because she wants me to eat as much as she does.

The saying is "Please make me slim and if you cant, make my friends fatter" :)

I would say 'I know you have a small appetite, MIL, so I won't offer you any of this,' and not give her any.

Agree with @MasterBeth

It probably comes from a place of insecurity - they're worried about what people will think if they eat "a lot".

That said I'm the opposite. I'm well known as the office glutton 😁

If they eat their tiny/giant portions without making too much fuss, it's fine. It's the noise around the whole process that is annoying.

I have to say I also don't get this Mars thing. If guy enjoyed it and didn't brag about it how self-controlled he is, who the fuck cares? He can do what he wants. Same with woman and her tiny salad who was eating quietly, enjoying her meal. As long as she doesn't point on other people that they're disgusting pigs, why posting a comment here? Let's focus on those who brag like they want prize or something.

I just googled those pastries and they look delicious and now I want one

I do worry because it's catching - FIL recently started up with it.

I gave him a normal slice - got right amount of servings out of shop bought cake which I think are on mean side- and he went on and on about how much it was - then had seconds.

I asked when I did the slice - though I'd have struggled to make it slimmer - it was after it was plated he started up - and I think it must now be normal for him as he spends more time and more time just with MIL since retirement.

No judgement of course but then that isn’t really what this thread is about. This is about the song and dance people make over ‘normal’ eating as if eating is a weakness.

Poor Roger!

I used to get at work, “how come you’re always eating but never put on weight?” (In my skinny days). I did stop for a moment and think, gosh am I always eating? Realised I probably was and just carried on (we could eat at our desks). No one is ever going to make me feel ashamed of eating.

I wonder how many times people will have to post on here to reiterate that it isn’t the eating healthily that is annoying. It’s the constant GOING ON ABOUT IT!

If it bothered me this much I would either have to either say something to them, or put on earphones, eat somewhere else, rather than start a thread on MN.

After all, it doesn't solve your problem does it OP?

Depends on the restaurant, I've got a good appetite but I certainly wouldn't clear my plate in some places.