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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Do you hate out adventure activities?

189 replies

user1496262496 · 19/02/2023 13:30

I run an outdoor centre which is primarily for young people. The sort of place schools book in to for a week and the young people do climbing, mountain walks, canoeing and bushcraft etc.

The culture of outdoor activities such as rock climbing, mountaineering and paddle sports has traditionally been male dominated. Participation has traditionally been male dominated. British Canoeing’s web site and Mountain Training’s website have loads of figures about this. There is research… but no one seems to ask the women who don’t engage, or who got put off for some reason at a young age.

I want the activities my centre runs to be as appealing as possible and for the young people to have the best time.

Where do outdoor centres etc go wrong?

I am interested to hear from women who don’t like outdoor adventure activities. What was it that put you off them? What is it that means they aren’t something you would do as an adult?

I don’t think I am unreasonable to think there is a problem in my industry.

If your DC didn’t like their school residential, why didn’t it work for them?

OP posts:
BertieBotts · 19/02/2023 18:18

I liked doing this stuff at school but I've never come across any opportunity to do it as an adult, and if I did honestly I think I'd be frightened that it would be dangerous and I'd get into difficulty. Also yes wet and cold very much doesn't appeal. I'm not very strong and I'm a bit of a wuss.

I've done high ropes climbing courses and those have been great. What I like about them is the safety harness and training at the start, and the fact it's all very clearly graded so I can choose not to attempt the really difficult ones. So I think if I was to see a flyer for a centre offering these activities, I'd want to know that I can hire a wetsuit, that safety training is provided and that it's suitable for different abilities.

PalindromemordnilaP · 19/02/2023 18:19

I'm fat and unfit and would be achey and struggle.

If I had a working body, I expect I'd love it.

JMSA · 19/02/2023 18:25

Ponderingwindow · 19/02/2023 18:11

Reading this thread has brought back memories of a work outing where one of the men I was grouped with moaned the entire time that he got stuck with someone as uncoordinated and unskilled as me in his group. It was a 2 hour competitive activity and he was actively hostile the entire time. I did my best to ignore him and just have fun, but it absolutely ruined the outing.

I am always going to be the worst at a sporting activity. We could have had an art activity. I would have done great at that, but the sporty people would complain to no end if the team building exercise was painting a mural or making a sculpture.

With respect, you haven't met me yet GrinGrinGrin

IntentionalError · 19/02/2023 18:31

The scars of ghastly school PE lessons are deep. I absolutely hate being cold, wet or dirty. I expect warm, dry, spotlessly clean, hygienic and completely private changing, showering & toilet facilities. I absolutely refuse to put myself in a situation where I might feel physically unsafe or risk being publicly humiliated. When outward bound activities comply with these criteria, I will consider participating. Until then, forget it.

DazzlePaintedBattlePants · 19/02/2023 18:37

I have also just realised how much wearing a helmet puts me off. I want to cycle more to work but having to sort out helmet hair is a massive PITA. It sounds really stupid but just one of those small things that disadvantage women. A bloke is either baffled that it’s an issue or doesn’t get that you’ll be judged for bad hair.

Scottishskifun · 19/02/2023 18:41

MelaniesFlowers · 19/02/2023 13:51

It’s cold, it’s usually wet, it’s boring, the clothing and the gear is really ugly, and the types of girls/women that do these activities tend to be tomboy/masculine.

I would never take part myself and would discourage my daughters from doing so too.

What a load of bollocks and clearly you know zero outdoorsy women!
Generally many don't bother with makeup especially if coming off a river or out of the sea......

What a sad state for your daughters that you project your own insecurities about trying something new onto them.

Scottishskifun · 19/02/2023 18:47

DazzlePaintedBattlePants · 19/02/2023 18:37

I have also just realised how much wearing a helmet puts me off. I want to cycle more to work but having to sort out helmet hair is a massive PITA. It sounds really stupid but just one of those small things that disadvantage women. A bloke is either baffled that it’s an issue or doesn’t get that you’ll be judged for bad hair.

Helmet hair is pretty easy I use a skull cap underneath if I have something on straight after same to sort out as putting a warm hat on just brush it. I also put my hair into a plait so it doesn't get tangled 🙂

Smithstreet · 19/02/2023 18:56

My girls (and me and DH) are part of a sea based club. It has lots of women and girls involved and all the age groups have a male and female "captain".

They swim, paddle, surf every week but they are aware of female needs in terms of changing rooms, equipment etc. The clubhouse is warm and spacious to have a warm up after and they have a cafe/bar area. It is a really great atmosphere, very welcoming and inclusive. My eldest DD has really benefited from the out of school friendships when things have been a little intense as teenage girls can be.
My girls see women and older teens very active in the club (and the older teens working on the beach in the summer) and while some drop out of course the vast majority have kept going and really enjoy the out of school friendships, fitness and opportunities to travel and take part in competitions.

I agree that the kit is a big issue and I do not want to wear shared unfitting wetsuits, boots etc. Me and my DH have invested in buying them and ourselves all the right and good quality kit, this makes a big difference as well to comfort and confidence and I know is prohibitive to others who cannot afford the kit as a proper winter wetsuit is not cheap. I know we are lucky.

NeverDropYourMooncup · 19/02/2023 19:02

Why do you only want to hear from women who hate them?

Why not the women who absolutely loved them but don't do them?

I'm one of those.

  1. I can't get to them. Not everybody drives, so what about running some sort of transport system from the nearest train station?
  2. is your equipment designed to fit women in terms of height AND size/proportions?
  3. Are there appropriate toilet facilities? You know, clean, safe, hot water, sanitary disposal, somewhere to dry off and maybe change in larger private cubicles without it being in full view of or accessible to males?
  4. Do you do things that don't rely upon being very slightly built? Do you state if there's a weight/width limit on certain things before booking, so nobody's in a situation of getting there to find that they've paid to watch other people?
  5. Are there activities that don't rely upon being superfit and able to lift/support your own weight in advance?
  6. Do you have structured plans where it could be used as an exercise/strength/fitness building activity over multiple weeks?
  7. Are there any activities that won't be dominated by a bunch of six foot tall men who didn't fancy wearing Lycra every weekend?
  8. Can you adapt activities for those who aren't as physically able? Not just 'wheelchair accessible', but in terms of maybe having a slightly duff shoulder, a need to sit down for five minutes, without having to walk and stand up constantly for the duration of the activity?
Favouritefruits · 19/02/2023 19:10

I canoed as a child as my Dad was an instructor, I have a canoe now but apart from the odd day in the summer it lives in the garage. I began to dislike it when I became a teen and saw all the old men ogling the few females. The changing rooms in my old club are cold, wet, dirty and damp, who wants to take up outdoor adventure sports and use these type of facilities.

ItsCalledAConversation · 19/02/2023 19:16

teachermummyme · 19/02/2023 18:01

I'm a teacher who's taken many year six cohorts on trips to these sorts of places. As previous posters have said (though I haven't read the whole thread) feelings of embarrassment and awkwardness over their body plays a big part in girls' reluctance to take part. I also find that girls respond well to female instructors.

However the main thing in my experience that puts off some girls from (sometimes) enjoying the experience as much as the boys is too much focus on competition. So often I've seen girls who were perfectly up for and enthusiastic about an activity - say, climbing - get put off when the instructors introduce a competitive element. The focus then turns from challenging yourself, learning a new skill etc, to being the best and beating others. Girls who may not be the most athletic or naturally skilled in the activity become self-conscious because the focus is on how competent they are - which is even worse if in teams and their performance is likely to make their team lose.

This is a great post. They should have two streams for each activity: those who want to compete and be challenged, and those who just want to learn and take their time.

PuttingDownRoots · 19/02/2023 19:17

Women who want to do waterspirts but don't like wetsuits... you don't need them in Canadian canoes.

SweetSakura · 19/02/2023 19:22

PuttingDownRoots · 19/02/2023 19:17

Women who want to do waterspirts but don't like wetsuits... you don't need them in Canadian canoes.

I don't wear one to paddle board either. Just quick dry clothes in case I fall in. I do wear a buoyancy aid (personal preference) though

MrsToothyBitch · 19/02/2023 19:24

I'm dyspraxic. I don't put myself in situations where I'm likely to be a group dunce or hindrance, slow on the uptake or where my lack of dexterity and other skills could be dangerous. I'm also underconfident in general, especially now I have a really dodgy joint and I've never been that outdoorsy or group oriented.

I didn't mind my school residential but had no desire to go on one again or do DofE. Just really not my thing.

woodhill · 19/02/2023 19:25

I would probably want to pee 30 mins after getting in a wet suit

PuttingDownRoots · 19/02/2023 19:29

SweetSakura · 19/02/2023 19:22

I don't wear one to paddle board either. Just quick dry clothes in case I fall in. I do wear a buoyancy aid (personal preference) though

Show quote history

I really meant there a lot less possibility of an unplanned swim! Only came close to it once (dickheads in a speed boat trying to capsize us)

ghostyslovesheets · 19/02/2023 19:29

I started SUP aged 50! I love it but it's expensive so can't do it as much as I'd like

I enjoy the peace and the water - don't mind a wetsuit - I like the outdoors - growing up we did a lot of walking - because it was free!

I'd try other water sports but not climbing as I'm scared of heights

My youngest DD (14) has also done SUP with me - my eldest two (18/20) play football but aren't big on outdoor stuff - they love Go-Ape type things though

SweetSakura · 19/02/2023 19:32

PuttingDownRoots · 19/02/2023 19:29

I really meant there a lot less possibility of an unplanned swim! Only came close to it once (dickheads in a speed boat trying to capsize us)

Show quote history

Ah I see what you mean. Tbh that's the only time I ever am at risk of falling in on a sup- idiots on speedboats.

I can't wait to get better and get back out on the water!!

IbizaToTheNorfolkBroads · 19/02/2023 19:48

woodhill · 19/02/2023 19:25

I would probably want to pee 30 mins after getting in a wet suit

Best way to warn it up😉

Newstartonwards · 19/02/2023 19:49

I do loads of Duke of Edinburgh. I am the sole female teacher - I always get the girls together - right who is on their period, who is worried about periods etc painkillers etc - hadn’t even occurred to the male teachers. Period pants are a game changer as are carrying poo bags - trying to squat and have a wee is awful as a woman trying not to get it over your shoes - boys whip it out fine. Trying to squat in some bushes and do a wee and change a tampon or pad and dispose of the other - bugger me that’s a whole different ball game.

instructors looking at you and giving you a small wetsuit and then you having to ask for a larger one is humiliating. Dryers are a must - cubicles to change in with sections eg wet stuff and dump on floor move to next part which is drier and has mats etc not having to get out of a shower onto a dirty floor

all are considerations

on a recent Duke of Edinburgh trip the female students were grateful of the ‘group chat about periods etc’ the male teachers - wasn’t even something they have factored in despite all of them being married!

woodhill · 19/02/2023 19:51

@IbizaToTheNorfolkBroads

I think I'll give it a miss😅

Oigetoffmylawn · 19/02/2023 20:03

I adore outdoor activities, so hardly in a place to help I'm afraid. But I absolutely love rock climbing, Ghyll scrambling, kayaking and hiking.

nicknamehelp · 19/02/2023 20:05

Being larger and either ppe not fitting or fear of being told too big or I physically can't do it.

JessicaBrassica · 19/02/2023 20:05

I'm probably no help to you. I love all of that stuff. Maybe it was a reaction to an indoor childhood of books, museums, churches, art galleries etc.

I have brought my kids up with it too. DD will boulder but dislikes heights/ tall walls. She likes kayaking, wild swimming. She goes to scouts and cadets. Loves camping. Both kids moved out of the family tent at 9/11 into their own 1-man tents. Both can make fire and cook outdoors.

She tends to opt out of school trips for adventurous activities, partly because it's nothing special to her, (she gets to do it at home, at a more appropriate level) and it stops her attending other activities.

We have a dry robe for changing and we can wee outdoors. Also good waterproofs. Infact, she dragged me up a hill at 9 for her first fell race. We couldn't see more than 10m but she told me it was only weather and to dress appropriately.

lovemypuppa · 19/02/2023 20:13

Coldness mainly. I didn't like church halls for the same reason. Saying that I was just much more animal orientated - often cold but the animals made up for it.