To ask how to raise an intellectual child?

[raindances]

I really want to nurture my DS potential, he is 4 and bright/advanced.

I have always done well academically and plan on doing a PHD but I wasn't raised in a way that nurtured this.

How do you raise intelligent, intellectual, well-rounded kids?

Books and as little media use as possible. Nothing rots the brain more than TV or news.
Nobody comes across thicker than someone who says "I watch the news".
Encourage them to take nothing at face value

Make them do cross-country running.

After regularly running miles in mud and snow, everything else is piss-easy.

Op just be aware as much as we want to mold our dc they are their own people.

Your child may not like what you like..
Also your child might not like reading...

Reading is the easiest way to learn but with one dc here who doesn't like it we have found many other ways to get vocabulary up and understanding of stories etc.

She won't listen to audio books either!

You basically work around your dc ad what they like. My dc aren't aware in an obvious way of half the things I naturally expose them too.
Life is short I want them to achieve their potential but to also enjoy life.

... They sound very intelligent. And just imagine how well they might have done if they had had early intellectual stimulation at the optimal time.

Does it matter ?

Your priority is to raise a happy , loving , caring individual.

@sha

@Shannith great post 😊

To be loving and caring one must possess intelligence.

And happiness is undefinable... it's something each person discovers for him/herself through engagement of all the human dimensions... one of which is the intellectual.

I think the thing that probably made the difference for me was having a grandparent who took me to the library a few times a week with no restrictions on what books I could take out, let me watch the discovery channel (including forensic science programmes), and didn't shy away from difficult topics or debates (e.g. capital punishment at six year old). I think it's so important to follow the interests of the child, whatever they may be (even if they are weird!)

My parents are both phds, family on one side were also all PhDs, several of them university professors, etc etc - my childhood was jam packed with books, museums, music, culture, you name it… no TV, no junk food, no plastic toys, and guess what? I now love trash TV, can’t remember the last time I read a book, and love my partner who barely scraped his A-levels and didn’t go to university. I failed out of two different degree programs; both top league Unis but it just wasn’t for me, finally ended up with a 2:2 from somewhere decent but less impressive. Never took to the number of “high-flying” jobs I tried and now just trying to actually enjoy myself for the first time in my life. Oh, and I now also spend ridiculous amounts of money on therapy because of I’m still recovering from the expectations that were put on me. Please done do this to your poor child.

Oh, and I’ve been in rehab twice and it is FULL of people like me - just as many of “us” as people who were neglected as children. Seriously, just let your child have an actual childhood.

Talk to them! Discuss ideas and embrace their interests. Set up opportunities for creativity and choice. Explain the meaning of new words and let them explore. Spend lots of time outdoors and encourage them to question.

Raise him to be emotionally intelligent, open minded, kind, respectful. Raise him to have integrity and curiosity.
Let him have his own interests, be interested in his interests and motivate him to pursue whatever gives him joy and speaks to his heart. If he is to be an intellectual, he will at his own accord.

Also, what do you even mean by “intellectual”? I mostly hear the word used in a cynical/condescending way to refer to people trying to cultivate a certain ‘academic’ image. To me it screams ‘dickhead in a black turtleneck and tortoiseshell glasses conspicuously carrying a battered Foucault paperback’ - but I’m not from the UK so this one might be lost in translation…

What? I bet you love a conspiracy theory, are unschooling and get all your 'news' on alternative websites Snopes has whole pages about .

Read to them every night

Same way you raise any child. My ds 7 is "bright" and is currently learning French. Languages are quite good.

I doubt it. I wanted my children to love reading as much as I do. I think it is highly likely that if i had forced it when they were younger I may have put them off reading. I didn't force them to read their books on reception because they were getting upset and frustrated. Now they love reading and read for over an hour every day. I have a younger non reader at home too and would take the same approach with her too.
I have a msc in child development and I haven't read any compelling research that teaching a child to read early is of any benefit.

Well, yes... and the only Foucault children should be exposed to is the big pendulum in the science museum one!

The specifically British cultural reference that comes to mind in relation to the word 'intellectual', OTOH, is Adrian Mole.

What a strange post. Maybe they're doing amazingly already.

I don’t think it has anything to do with parenting - DS9 could tell you everything about the periodic table/ elements/ space at the age of 4. He once woke me up to tell me what he’d read about Bose Einstein Condensates. He was reading at 1.5. DS5 couldn’t even speak until he was 4 and still isn’t great now! Doesn’t want to read etc. they have been taken to museums and spoken to about all sorts of topics from an early age. To push it, it can cause awful anxiety and will lead to them NOT fulfilling any potential they had.

I don't think you can force it, as all the examples of children with the same upbringing but different results show.

You can create an environment that fosters it, and I agree that reading loads, being curious about the world, learning to find things out, visiting museums and so on will help. (Also, "let's go and look it up," gets you past all those questions you don't know the answer to.) But you can still end up with a child that rejects it all when their sibling devours it.

I don’t think it has anything to do with parenting - DS9 could tell you everything about the periodic table/ elements/ space at the age of 4. He once woke me up to tell me what he’d read about Bose Einstein Condensates. He was reading at 1.5. DS5 couldn’t even speak until he was 4 and still isn’t great now! Doesn’t want to read etc. they have been taken to museums and spoken to about all sorts of topics from an early age. To push it, it can cause awful anxiety and will lead to them NOT fulfilling any potential they had.

I've been a teacher for nearly 30 years and have seen plenty of evidence that it is certainly often a lot to do with parenting. If you could do an IQ test on a baby, it wouldn't be a very good predictor of later academic achievement.

It's not about hot-housing - I would agree that parents who drive their children too hard (and often in directions the parents want, not the child) are almost as bad as parents who neglect their child's education altogether. But imo it would be ridiculous to say that actively supporting and facilitating your child's learning, helping to form their approach to their work, and providing opportunities to experience culture, do not usually make a big difference to them and how their life will turn out.

I don't think going to Oxford, having a PhD and working as an academic would put you in the 'averagely clever' camp, particularly given your background. Well done on your accomplishments - they are definitely not average!

Music!! Get them playing instruments, singing and as they get older playing in ensembles along side academics and sports. Read read read.