To ask how to raise an intellectual child?

[raindances]

I really want to nurture my DS potential, he is 4 and bright/advanced.

I have always done well academically and plan on doing a PHD but I wasn't raised in a way that nurtured this.

How do you raise intelligent, intellectual, well-rounded kids?

I think each person's intelligence, aptitude, whatever is largely innate and cannot be changed a lot.

I disagree. I'm not saying that nobody's maximum intellectual potential is higher than anyone else's, but the mind is pretty flexible, especially in young children. What they are exposed to and do and think about at an early age will have a huge effect on their aptitude and ability to do well later. This is even the case with adults. That's why we are encouraged to do things to keep our brains active.

Have conversations and discussions- l found talkng about the stories we read a good way to develop language skills- the classic what happens next is great! Make them find solutions to their little problems... when they ask questions, look for the answers together online or in books.

Take them places, ask what they like / dislike about the park/ playground ect.

Engage with them, to many parents are glud to their phone while out and about, or worse, the DC are. No looking around and asking questions about the world when glued to Peppa Pig & Co.

And then you just need a lot of luck that DC are taking it all in!

Honestly I wouldn't put the money into an encyclopaedia now if it's a 1 off, with access to the internet we have access to all that information for children more easily and cheaply. So much more accessible for less wealthy households, it's a genuine wonder!

The things my children learn about just by virtue of existing with professional parents in a city as opposed to economically deprived parents rurally is hugely different. The places they've seen, their awareness beyond their own locality. Children nowadays have access to so much, we just need to ensure its available to themt o learn.

Be a role model. If kids see you having intellectual conversations, reading, studying etc., they will follow. Give them your time and attention. I think there's nothing worse than parents who expects their kids to excel in academics, while they mindlessly scroll facebook (I'm not saying you are!).

I don't agree. I went to a comp for a while and then a private day school. Lots of the very mediocre students at my private school went on to get degrees and masters. On the whole the average students at my comp have not done nearly as well.

I do agree about the importance of being content.

I don't think you need to do anything. Just be encouraging, supportive, open minded. Agree with pp Glass that the child will then find their own level.

I have dc who are very bright and have profound Sen - so top and bottom 1%. It’s just lucky genes. The bright ones loved to read and that helped with verbal skills, vocabulary etc. Even at A level teachers would tell me they could tell they read at home. But I wouldn’t call either intellectual as they are lazy and found school incredibly boring (because they found the work so easy). They aren’t great intellectuals now they are at uni they still do the minimum to get by. There were many less able dc who actually enjoyed learning and were more engaged at school and did extra curricular etc. Just because they find school easy doesn’t mean they enjoy it. In fact I often think being good at every subject can make it harder to find your ‘thing’. They had loads of exposure to museums / culture etc but neither have particular interests. Keeping them off tech (and putting your own tech away) when they are young so you can join in their play or facilitate play dates as verbal and social skills / imaginative play
are just as important. It was always really obvious when kids came round which ones did a lot of gaming even at 5-6 as they didn’t have a clue how to invent a game or occupy themselves. Let kids be bored so they want to make up a game of building a den or choose to read a book.

I recommend the book "Raising Kids Who Read" by Daniel Willingham.

Also "What your Preschooler Needs to Know" by ED Hirsch. There's a series - one for each grade up to I think 8, covering the core knowledge curriculum. There is a lot of American history in the series, but we are supplementing with an Usborne British History book instead.

@raindances one of my kids is 8 and way beyond his peer group in most aspects of education.

This isn't always a good thing. They can become bored and disengaged. He does have gaps in his education as well due to lockdowns and my poor teaching ability and has picked up my accent/pronunciation and vocabulary on certain words. (I'm not British) for example He is meeting all expected levels for ks2 math but according to his school could be excelling but practical application is missing. He can work things out mentally but fails to show written proof. In English he is brilliant but because of my American pronunciation he can sometimes confuse his basic phonics as taught by the curriculum.

H and I have both been raised with education and exploration as focus to everyday life we have done the same with our kids.

Lots of reading, every night, every chance. Cooking together for weights and measures, attention to detail. Days out in the forest and natural trust, museums and cities. Lots of talking and explaining, encouraging questions. Always trying to give age appropriate explanations. (Not always easy when they are asking about coriolis effect) lots of STEM learning, puzzles and toys. Lego and building kits, messy play. Anything we come across that can work on problem solving and critical thinking. We play alot of boardgames and introduced chess at around age 5. He now has a junior English Chess Federation ranking and is playing in tournaments. Sports clubs and team sports from an early age.

All of the above apart from the reading has been led by him as well. We are not and I stress that, pushy parents. We encourage a healthy interest and if he's not into it, that's OK. We move on. We never push him in a direction he doesnt want or can not cope with. We have no expectations beyond that the kids are happy, well adjusted and polite.

Children learn at their own pace and with the right tools and encouragement can exceed. But alot of it is down to them and their temperament as well. You can't forced it.

First of all teach her to read (I recommend the Glenn Doman method, which has been in use for 50+ years) and get her started on number sense. Google Professor Robbie Case. And yes, a second language if you've got one.

Except that some kids just aren't ready to read till they're more like 6 or 7. My DH (PhD scientist, like me) and DD (Cambridge MEng) were both this type. Kids like this need other things 'first', obviously. Read to them, of course, but do other things as well.

Read with them, read to them and let them see you read widely. Spend time chatting to them. Expose them to a wide range of music.Take every opportunity you can to use numbers and do maths in your daily life. Go to museums and galleries. Limit (but don't ban) TV and technology.

Reading together every night is a great place to start.

This. Let your child be a child. If I had a £1 for every person on here who says their child is advanced..🙄

Take him places that inspire him / excite him. Read. Cook. Explore nature (rockpooling, fossil hunting etc). Travel. Live a full life and be guided by his interests. Let him have down time with open ended toys such as construction toys, small world toys as young children learn best through play. Sensory play until the age of 7 has been shown to be beneficial in laying down neural pathways that are used for future STEM learning.

As other posters have said..Read, read, read. But beyond that, nature their love..whatever it is. Above all, children are curious, so, allow that curiosity, research, discover with them. Support that interest.
Understand that being intellectual doesn't necessarily mean being academic. Don't focus on the target hitting, but hone in on the natural abilities.
And feed them new opportunities and experiences often. Museums, the outdoors, different cultures. Talk candidly, although age appropriately. Don't baby or belittle.

Read with them every night, my kids know I will buy them any book. Work with them on number bonds then tables, get those basics in, then they will probably be on the top table or two in their class and their peers will drag them along.

Take them to museums and get them to watch things like operation ouch and deadly 60 rather than loads of cartoons. In a couple of years try something like the week junior, try to include them in some more adult conversations.

I guess it depends what you could as intellectualism/intelligence.

Private schools spoon feed top grade answers, it's what parents are paying for. Of course they get better results. It doesn't, in my view, equal a greater ability to comprehend information or think critically. To be able to read situations and respond sensitively and proactively (which is how I view intelligence).

Doing well academically often comes down to the ability to memorise and regurgitate information combined with teachers who teach what the markers are looking to see. To me, that isn't intelligence or intellectualism.

When you say those in your comp haven't done as well, what are you measuring them by? Salaries? Qualifications?

I agree. Don't put too much emphasis on the fact they're clever, it doesn't make them any more special than other children, just different.

My siblings were 'gifted', once they got out in the real world post school they struggled as the world is full of able and intelligent people and they were no longer put on a pedestal. They really seriously struggled.

I don't think you can create an "intellectual" child but the way you raise them can certainly help them reach their potential.
I don't think there is any need to do anything formal though, especially not at a very young age. Just encourage curiosity, take them to different places, read with them and above all, talk to them. Answer questions, show an interest in things that interest them even if they are actually of no interest to you. Don't have preconceptions of what they will be or can do.

“I through intelligence having ruined my whole life, hope that the child will be stupid and crown a tranquil life by becoming a cabinet minister”
from a Chinese poem circa 600 AD.

The most intellectual people I know have spent a lot of time unemployed. It gives them time to think great thoughts.

I'm not sure why anyone would want to shape their child into anything. Give them opportunities to discover who they are meant to be. Let them play physically and mentally. Let them read whatever they prefer whether it is novels, manga or technical books. Listen to them and answer their questions thoughtfully (when you have the energy!) . Take them to museums, the cinema and the park. Let them join clubs and ditch clubs. Let them make mistakes without fear of ridicule or derision.

There's no special virtue in being intellectual or any other attribute.

Please don't turn every interaction into some sort of learning activity. Or every conversation in to discussing high level topics. Let your kid be a kid.
But encourage their curiosity and interests. Reading, travelling, trying out new things will help. But don't push. Don't lecture. Don't compare them to others.
And let them watch Peppa Pig too!

Read, encourage curiosity and encourage play. I’ve come across parents with 4yo who say their dc is ready for school because there grown out of playing… that’s not normal or healthy. Yes you want to nurture their academic side but not ignoring other essential aspects like learning how to relax and find enjoyment.

I was responding specifically to your point that you can't "affect your child's academic success".
I agree that there is a difference between doing well academically and being intellectual . However, that wasn't what you originally said.
I think there is a lot you can do to help your child perform well academically. From the very basic things like providing a quiet space to complete homework and checking that they are completing it to taking them to museums and the theatre.