In an apocalyptic scenario, would you survive long?

[fourikeachairs]

I wouldn't! At all. I cannot run fast or fight, I'd be a goner immediately the zombies or aliens or whatever descend. When I watch a movie of tv with this theme I can't ever keep up with the characters when they make a quick plan about who is going to do what where, and when they give each other silent hand signals eg going into a room they think is occupied I'm just like huh what do you mean?

If you reckon you'd survive a good while if the shit hits the fan, what are your best survival skills? Are you good at going with the flow, being flexible, thinking quickly on the go?

My ex said to me once "if there was an apocalypse I'd be the person everyone wants to have around" which I kind of took as a compliment but i'm not sure now. I never complain about being tired or in pain, I eat absolutely anything and am happy to adapt to any scenario. I'm trained at boxing, kung-fu and construction and (was) very physically fit at the time I knew him. I also have a very high threshold for being scruffy and unclean and get on with pretty much anyone. I am VERY squeamish though so any major injuries or zombies then I'm out.

I'm quite good at hiding and being quiet

As long as I could just stay inside I'd be barricaded in for months reading books

Also if a zombie broke in I'm not squeamish and would cheerfully bludgeon it over the head with a hammer

But running and leaving the house, nope 👎

I’m pretty well trained in survival techniques, foraging, can make fire, know my bushcraft, first aider for years, and have a moderate stash (ideology from years ago when a shitty biz partner nicked off with £180k of my bloody money & we had to walk the streets to find change on the floor to buy a loaf, no food banks back then!). And I can handle a firearm.

But, I’ll be honest, I’m fat, 50, a disabled diabetic on crutches who piddles syrup, so I’d probably offer myself to the aliens/zombies as a dessert.

I'd honestly just kill myself.
I have no directional hearing, am vegetarian, and I can't run. I have zero interest in a fight to survive in a post apocalyptic world.

Can someone please explain this to me? I understood Rick going missing and not getting back to his kids, but Michonne? It made no sense. She had already lost a young child early in the apocalypse and she’s an absolute mama bear, but suddenly she decides to go and find Rick leaving her son and step daughter Judith behind. In Darryl’s care admittedly but still? I either missed a few episodes that explained it, or the writers’ room was full of child free children the day they wrote that.

Surviving an apocalypse seems like very hard work. I don't think I'd have the energy for it really.

😂 Sums up my feelings perfectly!

No.

Without my varifocals, I might walk up to a zombie assuming its my friend, or I might accidentally walk into a pit of zombies.

I'm vegetarian, I'm unfit, I can't stay quiet and I suit bright, winter colours, so khaki/camoflage does nothing for me. Not sure I could run in wedges either.

I think it would depend on the type of zombie...

Slow leg draggy ones that mistake lampposts for food, no problem.

Fast zombies that can hear I knocked over a glass at a mile away. I'd do myself in to save myself becoming one.

There already is a book called that. It’s very good. 🙂

Depressingly, I think I would survive for a very long time - for the simple reason that I have no desire to survive any apocalypse scenario. Life likes to fuck with me like that.

rubbish, 10 million are facing apocalyptic conditions right now and a bunch of safe, fully dressed westerners with working toilets and drinking water on tap are thinking, "O yes, lets imagine this is us, just for fun, just to distract us from the gas bill"

It stinks

How to protect your home in a zombie apocalypse.

I wouldn't. We had a 48 power cut last year and I moved out to a pub with rooms. Half a day without a hot shower, heat or hot food and I was done. Even lockdowns without hairdresser and manicure was an ordeal 🤣🤣

Id be crap. My only strategy would be to team up with more practical people. I have a few in mind. Id have to do something useful though like mind their children.

I've just got some "strings" for my specs. So as long as I don't lose those I will be fine. 😂

Our washing machine was out of action for ten days over christmas.

It was like the end of days in this house.

So you know, God forbid.

(And yes I KNOW there are terrible things going on in the world. But can we not have a bit of fun and distraction? When they were 12, my uncle and his friend used to write comedy skits to perform to people in the air raid shelters in WW2. People can have distractions and still take other things seriously. We don’t all have to sit around wringing our hands in despair at the world 24/7 to have empathy and compassion for what others are facing).

Actually, if it was looking like shit was about to kick off, I’d kidnap Bear Grills.

The apocalypse would hold nothing to my rage if I found out he was just full of it and was nothing without his camera crew and a stash of food off screen.

The very short answer to your question is: No!

I read a lot of post-apocalyptic fiction and naturally want to identify with the heros but since getting an autoimmune disease I've come to the realisation that the awful truth is I would not last long, well, not on my own! Also imagine trying to get hold of gluten free food and vitamin supplements! 😂I mean, if apocalypses have commercial breaks then perhaps I could keep going for awhile but honestly, unless the scenario is cats taking over the world and only letting cat-o-philes live, I will be toast!

Ex army and a nurse. Also was a Brownie and Guide. So in theory I'd be useful.
However these days I like my creature comforts, need regular cups of tea to function and don't do idiot's particularly well so I think I'll just stay at home if you don't mind?
Also, thanks to the menopause (will we get HRT in the apocalypse? ) I need to be in bed by 9.

I often practice my zombie moan and shuffle for the dawn of the dead

I just spent a good 15 minutes worrying about how I would muffle the sounds of my chickens if the zombies started dragging their limbs down my street...

I'm very squeamish indeed, so I would probably try to reason with a zombie rather than demolish its head. So I'd be dead, basically.
Also, who would want to survive an apocalypse?! Better dead.

😂

I’d just surrender to the zombies, I CBA trying to run and hide.

He has his own island though, hasn’t he? So that would come in handy if zombies can’t swim. Or can they swim?