I’m so so frightened

[INEEDAWEEAGAIN]

Posting for traffic I need some positive experiences if any..

I suffer with horrific health anxiety, I pay privately for therapy. All my life on and off I’ve had a weird pelvic pressure but it goes away the same day this time I got it and began panicking over it as it felt worse. Then the past week I’ve been needing to wee all the time. A weird feeling down below. I had some antibiotics but felt they wasn’t working.

Saturday I stupidly booked an ultrasound to check everything was okay and they’ve found a cyst in my right ovarie and I have bulky ovaries. He said he can’t tell me if it’s cancer or not and I’m worried sick.

I’m absolutely devastated I have a little girl and we are each other’s world. I can’t bear it, I feel like I’ve been handed my death sentence 😭😭😭😭

OP you have my sympathies, I too have bad health anxiety. Like if I have sore head i automatically think “that’s it I’ve got a brain tumour”
Therapy has helped me so much that I can now try and rationalise the chances of certain things actually happening to me.

Let’s say for instance that worst case scenario you did have cancer, that in itself doesn’t even mean death sentence. You likely will have caught it earlier and thinking rationally the likelihood that you would go on and recover after treatment.

However don’t be scared of me saying that because the chances are it’s some cysts that are perfectly normal.

Wishing you well Op, and keep on with your counselling. Please come back often and let us know how you are getting on.

Whether you had the scan or not the condition would still be there. You have not made it happen but now have a chance to be treated. Most cysts are not serious.

I also have ovarian Cysts . Was also told some can turn cancerous but it’s rare . I so far have had zero problems .

Health anxiety is the worst and you have my absolute sympathy. You feel completely out of control and when I get it I get very real symptoms such as sickness and racing heart. It’s also very hard for someone to reassure you. I had CBT for health anxiety as it was ruining my life - it helped a lot. Instead of thinking of the cyst as something you’ve probably had for a long time and it’s unlikely to anything serious (A), your mind is going straight to cancer (Z) without all the inbetween scenarios (much more likely). Similar to having a headache and thinking therefore it must be a brain tumour. Many women have ovarian cysts and many women are absolutely fine. The odds are greatly on your side x

I’m sorry that you had it but honestly that’s the last thing I needed to read 😢 now I’ve completely convinced myself I have it.

Even if you do have it you’ll most likely be fine, like the poster was.

Chances are you’re more likely to get killed by being hit by a car than you are by ovarian cancer.

How long have you had this anxiety?
If it’s since your DC has been born it could be a symptom of PND.

How I got over mine (apart from getting help with my PND by seeing the gp and getting tablets) was to realise that death is inevitable and being scared and anxious isn’t going to make it go away.

I don’t want to die and I don’t do anything extreme and keep myself healthy so that my risk of dying is lower but I have life insurance and I have chosen a guardian for my DD (single parent) if worst comes to worst.
I also talk openly about people dying and how it’s a natural thing and that we shouldn’t be too sad about it.

Doing these things won’t remove your anxiety completely but knowing you are prepared for the worst does make things easier.

I have ovarian cysts and a bulky left ovary (rude!). Very common and nothing to worry about. I know it’s easier said than done when you have anxiety though.

OP - this could have been me a few years ago. Health anxiety crippled my life - I got symptom after symptom, test after test. Each time I would have momentary relief and then onto the next thing. It contributed to the end of my marriage. Please, please take control of this. As other posters said, it could be as a result of PND. In my case, I think it was early perimenopause. I tried counselling, CBT, every kind of medication the fancy doctors could give me. Nothing worked.

Then two things happened. My marriage ended out of the blue, which caused a pain so severe that it outstripped any health anxiety - but showed me I could survive when something hideously unexpected happened. Then my GP put me on low dose citalopram. It changed my life.

I now go for regular mammograms, smears, mole checks with no problem - this would have been totally unimaginable for me before. I also had major surgery last year - and went in by myself. Again it would never have been possible. I obviously still get anxious about my health - as anyone would. I recently had to go to A&E because my BP was so high, but again it was fine. This would previously have had me shaking with fear and crying hysterically. I can't tell you the difference in me.

So, as many other people have said, it's likely that the cyst is nothing. But even if it is, being afraid of it won't help you. But I know the fear, the absolute terror when someone even suggests it could be something - as per your response above. I learnt the hard way that seeking reassurance just feeds the anxiety. The only way to defeat it is to face it.

Please, please get help for your health anxiety - ask about citalopram. Ask about CBT. Mine cost me dearly. Sending so many good wishes.

You will be fine. I have horrendous health anxiety….I have intrusive thoughts most of the time.

Once you’ve got this sorted out I would recommend to stop constantly being tested and seeking reassurance. If you’re tested, they will generally find something wrong with you that needs investigating. Then it’s two weeks of absolute panic, which doesn’t do you much good at all. I’m not saying to ignore something persistent but these things nearly always go away on their own. I’ve had all sorts of things ‘wrong’ and they’ve always gone away. I mean in the last three weeks I’ve had two brain tumours - one because I felt dizzy and I could hear whooshing in my ear and one because when I bent over I got a pain in my head. I’ve also had mouth cancer….I get that a lot. I’ve got osteoporosis because the dentist said I had two chipped teeth. It’s exhausting but it helps to have people make fun of me because that puts it into perspective.

Oh I’ve had one for 30 years.

I get recurring cysts on my ovaries, always benign. The biggest and most annoying symptom is the pressure and needing to pee. The cysts themselves are harmless (in my case)

Oh OP, that's a lot. Hopefully it's "just" a cyst, I know they can be a bugger but generally harmless.

What's the next step?

I know nothing we can say will stop the anxiety, but I just wanted to share that they discovered a cyst when I had my c-section and the surgeon referred me for a scan. The scan took place 2 weeks later and the cyst had already gone. I hadn’t realised how common they were until then.

I have been in a similar situation to you several years ago where I convinced myself I had a life threatening illness and had to wait 10 days for results. All I can say is to be kind to yourself while you wait and accept the worry as it comes, don’t try to fight it.

Hi OP

when I did egg donation they found a cyst at one of the scans and I felt exactly the same as you currently do. By my next scan it had totally gone. It’s scary but I’m sure it’s normal and will go away, please don’t let your fear take over. Sending you love and strength 💕

Ach, I'm really sorry about that. I know how horrible it is when you have worst-case scenarios running through your mind so I just thought it might be good to read that even worst-case scenarios aren't neccessarily all bad. Sorry once again.

I’m the same Op, the amount of things I’ve convinced myself I have from my symptoms. Your life feels over, it’s a black hole. I’m currently going through it & it has ruined the last 6 months of my life. It’s horrific. My friend has cysts & the same symptoms. She suffers pretty bad bless her. Look, you’ve got two options. Wait for your referral or do a private blood test. The blood tests you can buy online & results in 1-3 days. Everything is so much more worrying when you have kids. My advice, deal with this as soon as possible in my experience it manifests into other things & becomes a huge problem. I’m sorry you’re feeling this way & I feel for you as I’m exactly the same. How old is your DD?

An ovarian cyst usually only causes symptoms if it splits (ruptures), is very large or blocks the blood supply to the ovaries.
In these cases, you may have:
pelvic pain – this can range from a dull, heavy sensation to a sudden, severe and sharp pain
pain during sex
difficulty emptying your bowels
a frequent need to urinate
heavy periods, irregular periods or lighter periods than normal
bloating and a swollen tummy
feeling very full after only eating a little
difficulty getting pregnant – although fertility is usually unaffected by ovarian cysts

from Google x

I wouldn't do any private blood tests -- the only one which is sometimes useful in ovarian problems is the Ca125. If that's raised it can be cancer (but it often isn't). If it isn't raised, it probably isn't cancer (but it sometimes is). (Mine wasn't raised). So doing a random blood test when you've got no HCP to help you make sense of the results will probably create more confusion and stress.

Either the GP or the gynae clinic, when you go for your 2ww, will do relevant blood tests if they think it's appropriate, then they will know how to interpret the results together with the appearance of the scan and, of course, after examining you,

A cyst will give you the sensation of needing to urinate… cysts are quite common.

I think you need to address your stress and anxiety levels, a heightened state of ongoing stress isn’t good for you either. No experience, but would yoga/meditation etc help?

I have PCOS and I can feel my ovaries and uterus all the time wiggling and doing things.
I think it's the hormone imbalance and cyts growing.
I have my fingers crossed for you but it sounds to me like it's probably PCOS.

Pregnancy gave me a gigantic cyst on one of my ovaries! Presumably it popped as 8.5 years later I'm still here! They don't even do anything about them as they're so common and usually go away on their own

Hi OP, l'm 51 and can't quite remember what age I was when they first found cysts in my ovaries - 23? They came and went.

Good to make sure it's nothing else but cysts can be entirely harmless. I can feel my ovaries right now b/o menopausal hormonal chaos. Dull pressure, as you say.

In German there's a word for the ache you may feel in your ovaries at ovulation: Mittelschmerz or middle-pain. Middle of cycle I suppose. It's considered a mere nuisance, no sign of anything wrong.

I hope you get reassurance soon.

I can hear how scared you are, OP, the anxiety can feel unbearable. I’m another one prone to ovarian cysts (I have one now, as it happens) and they make me feel like I need a wee all the time. They are apparently common and the vast, vast majority are nothing to worry about. I’d be reassured also by your Dr thinking it’s likely nothing to worry about
While it’s good to be aware, I don’t think Google is always helpful at times like this, when anxiety is so high. I’d listen to your GP and I hope you can get some useful help for your health anxiety soon too. It’s something I struggle with and it’s so hard
Hugs 🌸

Chances are that you don't have cancer, they would never rule that out in an ultrasound though. I also suffer from health anxiety so you have my sympathies. I really hope it all turns ok and I have a feeling that when I check back it will all be fine.....

As a fellow anxious person OP, something my last GP (who was very lovely and helpful with health anxiety) told me once is that any symptom you've had, as you describe, your whole life is unlikely to be anything serious like cancer. That doesn't mean it shouldn't be checked and obviously it's not a guarantee, but he told me that I certainly shouldn't waste any time worrying about things that I've had for many years or symptoms that have remained the same for many years.

It's good you got the scan, because now they can check this cyst out and it's always better safe than sorry. But it doesn't sound worth stressing about to me. Let the doctors do their jobs - it's their job to worry about this, not yours. It will very, very likely all be fine x

I had a private scan when pregnant and they found a large cyst on my right ovary. They told me to ask at the nhs scan to check on it. After my 20 week scan they said it had not reduced in size and i’d need to return 5 weeks after birth to check it was gone. I often thought about it throughout the pregnancy. They never contacted me as they said they would and I was so worried I got in touch with my gp who referred me back for an ultrasound. The cyst was gone, they said my body had done its job and they often come and go throughout your life, only some women will get symptoms but this cyst was larger than they’d like to see them. I know you’re worried op but try and stay positive, it’s not worth worrying over something which may never happen.