Struggling with colleague

[Krayvon2]

A colleague I manage has ADHD. I've always been more than happy to accommodate and I've asked them several times what adaptations need to be made to brief in tasks etc

They've never been forthcoming with specific recommendations and it's always been vague so I've done my best and given them double the amount of time with tasks, ensured briefs are crystal clear with deadlines and regularly checked in and offered to help.

For a recent task I gave them double the amount of time I would give myself, sent them a brief and made sure they weren't given too many other tasks that week so they could concentrate on this one. I've always made clear that if they have difficulties for whatever reason, they need to let me know.

They left the task to the last minute and didn't do half of it so I had to step in and do a lot myself at the eleventh hour in order to avoid missing a client deadline. They didn't communicate difficulties at any point until I checked in. I'm at a loss as to what they were actually doing in the week I gave them to do the task.

When I pulled them up on it and asked what had happened, they mention the limitations of their condition straight away and explain how they have trouble with things like prioritising and focusing. Yet they didn't reach out once to explain this or ask me to brief in a different way to make it easier for them.

Have I been unreasonable here? I'm not pretending I have the answers but I have tried all I can think of to accommodate yet its not working and they're not really giving me much guidance on what they need yet it's always the reason why they can't do the work I set.

Meanwhile I'm taking on lots of extra work so as not to overload them yet they struggle with completing one single task. No idea what to do.

It’s considered a disability if it’s properly diagnosed and appropriate and reasonable adjustments are discussed with Occupational Health and HR.

And accommodations are not just doing less work !

And we are often scolded for assuming all ND people are the same. So surely, accommodations or adjustments need to be specific for the ND individual.

It doesn’t have to be formally diagnosed. Agree that Occ Health should be involved, but managers should be agreeing adjustments with support from HR.

We had something like this at work. The colleague had Asperger’s. She was offered support and declined it. Didn’t pass her probation and was let go.

There are "ADHD awareness" courses, and "ADHD in the workplace" courses. If you don't understand the condition then maybe that is something you can request.

They are taking the piss!
You have just given them free reign to do jack shit all week safe in the knowledge you will jump in at the last minute and do their job for them, it must be great being paid to achieve nothing.
The ADHD is for them to manage, with medication/coping techniques etc, not you.
If they are unwilling to tell you about any accommodations they require (have you documented that you have asked multiple times including their responses?) then I would work on the basis they do not require anything above and beyond their NT colleagues to get the job done.
Lastly, due to poor performance with the task you set them I would mostly definitely be expecting a daily progress report going forward containing proof that the job they are required to do is getting done.

Wow I bet you’re a bastard to work for

Exactly this. Adhd thrives on pressure. It's not healthy but gets results.

You may need to try the opposite way to get their brain firing fast.

@TigeToo I wouldn't think so, just practical.
At the end of the day if the work is getting done there would be no problem.
Unfortunately I wouldn't be doing that work for you.

@TigeToo I have ADHD and I agree with what @3LittleFishes has said. There's only so much OP can do and then it needs to be on the worker and all documented. OP can't just put up with this week in week out because the worker is not communicating.

Is it bastardry to expect a colleague to do her job?

@TigeToo just out of interest, other than calling me a bastard, how would you deal with the situation?

OP,

You are putting your own health at risk by being overwhelmed by doing this other persons job.

You are not paid, responsible or expected to do this persons function and you are very silly to do it.

Lay out exactly what occurred and how it impacted you, and the effort it took so that it didn't impact the client.

By doing this persons work you are taking a responsibility that is not yours.

Spell it out to HR that THEY need to deal with this.

I do not believe you should work with this person again, they are not dependable and are putting YOU at risk.

This is classic women fixing a problem that isn't theirs.

If you were a man you would not have done this, you would have called this work shy person out and dropped them in it long before the deadline OR allowed the shit to hit the fan.

If they are not up to the job, then they are not up to the job.

You do not owe them this.

Drop the rope and spell it out to HR.

This!

I manage someone with ADHD and as long as I scope out a project and build in extra time/flexibility, we've never had a problem. Their work is brilliant and always submitted on time.

@OnceAgainWithFeeling Well, it doesn’t sound as if the OP has had appropriate training to manage a colleague with ADHD. What would you suggest she do? Who could educate her on the appropriate accommodations?

Just to add, one of my friends is a GP with an ADHD diagnosis. She’s extremely good at her job, patients ask to see her ( we’re in the US so different appointments system). She thrives on a busy schedule, because it focuses her.

I know that’s just one example, but it demonstrates how well an individual can function in the right environment- but the OP’s colleague needs to help her/their employers create that environment, not wait passively for it to happen, IYSWIM.

HR should be supporting the conversation, not having it. HR don’t intuitively know what an individual needs either

This is very true, but then nobody knows what she needs because, though she's been asked repeaatedly and in good faith, nothing's coming back except "I've got ADHD" when something goes wrong

And the point about HR is that, if it comes to a disciplinary, OP will need their guidance on doing things correctly

The OP’s situation makes me wonder how old her colleague is, because the colleague sounds awfully like some current undergrads who assume a diagnosis of a learning disability (such as ADHD) absolves them of responsibility to develop their own strategies for completing work.

During their time at university they can just about scrape through without really sorting themselves out and we apply reasonable adjustments to assist them because we want them to thrive.

But I do sometimes wonder if our Learning Support people need to emphasise a higher level of strategising - because I really worry about how these young people will cope in the workplace where whatever the adjustments are, they need to be reasonable while still serving the business needs of the employer.

And while not learning and implementing coping strategies while studying for a degree will in the end only harm the student, it becomes a little more serious in the workplace.

I really worry about young people I encounter (not all of them of course) behaving in a similar way to that which @Krayvon2 describes.

Think it's important to own what your disability means in your working life. I had a colleague with Tourettes: he was open and quick to ask for what he needed, explained if he needed extra time or if he was having an episode and needed a delay or break, etc. It was alright to work with him because we knew what to expect, what to do, and he wasn't afraid to ask for help or explain if things would be delayed.

Colleague is in his 40s

So I'm not dealing with a young person who is new to the workplace here

So he's basically making an absolute mug out of you!🙄

He has you doing his job and stressing!

Wake up OP.

DD has diagnosed ADHD and takes medication. I strongly suspect I have it too and agree that more time equals more procrastination.

I use strategies to increase pressure on me such as booking a meeting with a customer to ensure I deliver the promised outputs - nothing like the fear of standing there with nothing to make you crack on.

DD's school is very strict and not doing homework leads to immediate detention. It really works for her as those deadlines are absolute and I've seen a massive change since she started there.

I don't give her medication outside school hours because I want her to develop her own coping strategies and the psychiatrist agrees with this approach for her.

So set out consequences to your colleague of not delivering such as being put on a performance improvement plan.

Contrary to popular opinion, HR practitioners aren’t judges, medics, counsellors, psychologists or magicians.

We understand employment law and how to support people to find the right answers.

I had missed the bit about the colleague not engaging. That’s not okay, and that’s the bit HR can help with. If they aren’t engaging, attempting to manage the issues or suggesting adjustments for consideration then capability proceedings should commence. This is a fraught area of law though so going in heavy wouldn’t be advised to begin with. Again, this is something HR should be able to support.

My dad was diagnosed at 72 after a successful creative career.

I was diagnosed at 45 when a career change involving lots of travel highlighted traits (as it’s hard to manage all of my other commitments when I’m hundreds of miles away 3 days a week and the additional organisation needed has been difficult). I have a successful career but it’s helped me understand the impact it has on my stress levels (because society/work isn’t set up
for people like me). I’m learning every day.

I suspect my DD will be diagnosed as secondary school has highlighted traits that she is struggling with.

Open your mind, breathe and try to see this from another perspective. It’s the basics of management.