Too young for potty training?

[forfuckssake23]

Sorry for using AIBU but I'm just needing some advice.

DD will be 2 in April. So far she has shown very little interest in the potty I bought for her. She will stand inside, place toys in it etc, and play with it. But when I remove her nappy and try sitting her on it (usually I say "can you do a wee wee / poo poo on the potty for mummy?"), she just says "no!" and gets off again.

She will tell me when she's just about to do or in the process of doing a poo - she says "poo poo". So she knows it's happening. She just doesn't want to sit on the potty.

I've tried to get her used to it by saying "where's your potty?" and bringing it out etc, she calls it a "poppy"😂, so she will engage with it. But no interest in it other than as a toy, if that makes sense.

Is she too young for potty training just yet? I don't want to force the issue too soon, but equally I don't want to miss an opportunity to get her started with it, if that makes sense.

Any thoughts?

They all reach developmental milestones at different times, defo not a race I agree @R0ckets

It does. I have a baby book from the 1950s and it has early 'potty training' from around 6 months.

If you're hand washing nappies I totally understand getting them out of them sooner.

Their version of potty training though was reliant on being home a lot of the day, and on catching what you can.

The routines given just mean sitting the baby on the toilet several times a day.

@Twizbe we were quite proactive about it and encouraging once they showed an interest and mine didn't go to nursery until after they were out of nappies, so environmental influences helped.

I was quite shocked when I met a mum who told me she "wasn't bothering" with potty training and was "going to let nursery do it" 😳
It's just not how I wanted to do things. That child was unsurprisingly in nappies a long time.

in reality most kids are toilet trained by 3 ish,it's not a competition and it makes no.odd ,s wether a typical child is 2 or 3 when it clicks

I think the Oh Crap author describes the stages of training along the lines of: I have no idea I peed -> I’m peeing -> I need to go pee

It’s a great book, if you can ignore the Americanisms 🤣, I’d really recommend reading it. But if your DD is already recognising she’s peeing then she’s pretty much got stage 1 down and training would likely be doable. But equally there’s no rush and it might be easy to wait until she’s 2 and for the warmer weather so you don’t have to crank the heating because she’s not wearing bottoms!

DD was trained by 22 months
DS1 started at 2
DS2 I didn’t even start him until 2.5

Depends on the child as with everything.

Kindly, get a hobby and some fresh air.

Depends on the child DD was just over 3 & was still in pull ups at night for ages after. We used to lift her around 11 for a wee. DS was just 2 when he was dry day & night.

My god, I mean I'm all about taking the path of least resistance but even I draw the line at letting nursery potty train my kids lol.

I hate potty training. Hands down it's been the worst part of parenting so far.

I think maybe a bit too young yet. Mine is 2.5 and just started showing an interest and enjoying the round of applause she gets when she uses it. However, there are times where she shouts for a nappy and won't use potty so I just don't push it as eventually she'll get there.

Much easier to wait until they are ready to be trained otherwise I always think it's the parents being trained to dash off to the loo, have a potty ready/with them at all times.
My DC were later than their peers but all were dry pretty much straight away once I put them in pants.
We did use pull-ups for a while beforehand and had the potty in the bathroom and sometimes they would sit on the potty when I used the loo so they knew what it was all about.

It's not too young to try - some kids get it early and I think it can be hard to predict which ones they are. I don't think it's always to do with how articulate they are either.

I tried to train mine as early as possible but it was about 2 1/2 for three of them and a bit later for my forth kid. They didn't have accidents once they were trained though so that was good.

I'm a big fan of trying to get them to learn as soon as possible. It must be so much more comfortable for them. I think waiting until they tell you they are ready is rubbish advice. Why wouldn't you try to encourage them to learn something new that is in their best interests.

Some kids are genuinely not ready until they are older and that's fine but you have to give it a try to find out.

@forfuckssake23 she isn't too young, my girl is 24 months exactly and day trained at 18 months, we used the oh crap method and she caught on very quickly

I honestly would just wait until she shows more interest, or just until abit older. I found with dc1 that trying too young just set myself up for accidents, tears, and no progress. Honestly closer to 3 made a huge difference, he was potty trained within 2 days! Dc2 trained self by 2 and a half, wanting to copy and sitting on potty when I hadn't started the process yet, it was crazy! They are all ready in their own time. I would say though alot of people who say their dcs are potty trained at a very young age have to keep putting them on the toilet, they aren't really trained at all. Children don't have the feeling to go until 24-30 months, it differs so your dc may not have it fully yet.

Most children*

Also the 4 signs of readiness are: 'Pulling at a wet or dirty diaper. Hiding to pee or poop. Showing Interest in others' use of the potty, or copying their behavior. Having a dry diaper for a longer-than-usual time.'

Trained both of mine before 2 (18 months and 22 months - I waited for summer with dc2). It was easy. I didn’t wait for any potty related “signs”, I waited until they had good enough language to say wee and poo. If they can do that they can learn imo. And fwiw it took 2-4 days for each of them (people always say takes longer when they are younger, not at all true for us).

I would wait a few more months and do it in spring/ summer. I did that and my girls were sorted in about 2 days, and never had an accident. There is no rush.

I don't think she's too young at all. My oldest basically 'trained' herself starting at 18 months and I trained my younger two as soon as they'd had their second birthdays, but started getting them ready for that from around 20 months (encouraging them to have a go at using the potty/toilet every time they got changed or I was using it). Incidentally my youngest didn't have any of the 'ready' signals but I went by the Oh Crap mindset of - this is happening, don't stress about accidents, don't second guess yourself or your child!

Agree with some of the other posters, the people who say their kids are potty trained super early seem to have quite a lot of accidents, and also have their life revolving around toilets all the time, having to keep pre-empting and taking their child. Whereas if you wait a bit, you avoid all of that. And each child is individual. My oldest girl took day nappies off at 2.5 years but night nappies (for wees, not poos) about 6 months later. The second one took both off at same time (her decision - she kept taking the night ones off herself) when she was just over two. And for my son, it all happened when he was 2 and 3/4.
As a more experienced mother said to me - you don't see adults wandering around in nappies, they all get there, so what is the rush.

I agree with you. I think before 2 they just don't have the language skills.
I think just leave the potty around the place and let her find her way to it if she wants to.

Mine were each completely different on this front. Eldest showed no interest at all for ages not even when she was in a room at nursery with a load of slightly older potty training kids. Then when it got near her 3rd birthday I thought I ought to start encouraging her and she nailed it in one weekend and went to nursery on the Monday just in pants. Barely ever had an accident.
Youngest found her way to it gradually. Using it sometimes and sometimes not until she never weed in her nappies anymore. She was in pants earlier but was less reliable and had more accidents. I don't know if that was an age thing or just coincidence.

I think they key thing is not to push it too hard when their too young or end up in this ludicrous competitive thing some parents get into!

Read Oh Crap Potty Training.

I trained all my kids between 18m-2y because it was more convenient to ditch the nappies. She’s not too young.

I never used a potty (never even bought one). I think I trained them with a similar method to how I house trained our puppy - ie frequent trips to the toileting area for puppy and for the children regularly popping them on the toilet (child toilet seat was on there). Eventually it seemed to click. I also used the method by that controversial book, which name escapes me and kept the nappies off (except at night). Not fun but that combined with frequent trips to the toilet worked.

I agree with this. No one would have thought 2 was very young if you were asking this question a generation or two a go.

I didn’t use cloth nappies for my first and they were 2.5 years, which seemed pretty average. With my second, in cloth nappies, we did it by 2 years (and night trained also within weeks) and it was much easier than I’d expected I regret so much not using cloth nappies the first time. I think there were two parts of it - 1) It wasn’t a huge amount of work but I was “done” with washing nappies so I was incentivised myself to try the best I could and 2) the child is so much more aware of feeling wet and knowing when they are weeing and not wanting to feel wet. I think this was why the night training was a doddle second time round (no real “training” involved) because she didn’t want the big night nappy on anymore.

Potty training by 2 is certainly younger than average now in the U.K., but not in the recent past here and not in many parts of the world. Still, I wouldn’t put the pressure on yourself - you’ll know pretty fast if it’s the right time.