To be enormously offended by the C-word

[AmericasfavoritefightingFrenchman]

So today a man called me a c* during an argument, and I was assured by everyone around, including three women, that this is no longer an insulting word, not shocking or taboo, and that I was unreasonable to be enormously offended.

This idea is shocking to me. Surely it’s very offensive and deeply misogynistic? I was definitely offended, and hurt that the women I was with thought it was no big deal.

Or am I unreasonable? Is it so unoffensive these days as to be a casual, unremarkable part of conversation?

Wonderful word, but not one any man is entitled to use in anger or at all, really.

Up here in Scotland it’s a multi talented word and used a lot.

Personally, I find the rest of what he said much worse.

Do really find the word ‘Cunt’ worse that the rest of it

I don’t find it anymore offensive than all the insulting words people use for male genitalia. But I hate swearing in general. I think everyone swears too much nowadays. It’s just vulgar. No one needs to be saying swear words in every sentence like so many do. It’s highly unimaginative and makes someone just sound rough and rude.

So sick and tired of seeing the wannabe cool people on here posting “it’s an everyday word in our household” etc.

Have you completely missed the point of context when it comes to words?

If your DH calls the cat a daft cunt, good on him. Because the context there is that he’s using a previously offensive word in jest. If someone says “you silly cunt “ to you, and you understand the context, then fine.

but that DOES NOT take away the word’s power in everyday life. You cannot decontextualise the word for thousands of women who would know the intent someone uses that word for, and why.

If someone says to a woman “you fucking CUNT” it’s clear this isn’t an in joke or some sort of decontextualised use of the word in jest.

It’s designed to hurt, to wound, to diminish.

context is everything. Don’t ever try to come on here and tell everyone the word is fine. It’s not when someone is trying to verbally wound and upset a woman.

I don’t find it particularly offensive, doesn’t mean that you can’t though.

Personally I quite like it as a word, it’s strident and Germanic and ends with a good old plosive consonant.

I don't find it offensive, but then the only words I take offence to really are ableist and racist terms that harm people/groups of people (like the term for the former name of scope, which gets your post hidden here and similar)
I think the C-bomb is vulgar, and I don't use it, but it doesn't shock or offend me.

It’s the second most Offensive word in the uk, out with the n word. Yes some people lead lives that it’s bt thus level, but it doesn’t change ir

and as a Glaswegian, I take offence at the cunt who tried to say we call everyone that as a term of endearment.

Pretty good summary of the thread tbf

(Unless he’s Scottish and it’s not in anger! I’ve been called it as an absolute term of endearment in Glasgow and the Highlands!)

You cannot decontextualise the word for thousands of women who would know the intent someone uses that word for, and why.

It's just a word, and whilst I understand its context so would never use it towards somebody else, as woman, I get to choose what offends me, not you. I can decontextualise it for myself because there are more harmful things in this world than an medieval curse word. You have no right getting angry as to how anyone else feels about a word and how they take it if on the receiving end of it.

My DH and I use the word as punctuation… and best not mention our DC 😆 but that’s within the walls of our home - if the man who said it to you isn’t a very close friend, and if you don’t both use the word to each other in jest frequently, then he was totally out of order to call you that. He sounds like a massive c*, in fact.

It does remind me of a funny story my DH tells, when he was younger and his boss got blocked into a parking space by a someone. The boss started off asking the lady to move politely and calmly but got more and more frustrated by her, and finally decided to end end his sentence by saying ‘You Effing……’ He then paused as he cast around in his mind for a suitably strong but not sweary word, but clearly not managing to think of one he then just bellowed ‘You Effing… C*!!!’ (uncensored word) at her 😂

Loads of varieties too - daft, funny, smelly... there's a type for every scenario 🤣

YANBU to be offended though OP, it's a feeling, not a choice.

Same. I hate it.

(But just to add, I'm not saying women shouldn't be offended by it, OP feels how she feels, but I'm not trying to be "cool" not seeing the offence myself, it just isn't there for me)

I don't really get feeling "deeply offended" by a word. If someone gave you a total personality assassination, fair, but using a word? No.

Tbh no swear words really bother me at all and I use them all. Often me, my friends, DH, some colleagues simply punctuate our normal language with some swear words, usually to emphasise a joke or sarcasm or something - not in an aggressive way.

I would find someone intimidating me and arguing in my face offensive as opposed to them calling me the c-word in particular.

Agree. Context is vital. Channeling your inner Chaucer? Crack on (😉).

Calling me a cunt because I’m female and you’re male and I won’t bow to your authority / allow you to insult me? Fuck off dick.

Ooh good on you @nca89

Im sure you’ll just laugh at the “medieval word” if some man you accidentally cut up on the road leans out of the window and bellows the word at you

It’s fine to be calm about all words when no context is involved. As a mixed race person I’m notionally fine about the N word being used and reclaimed by black Americans etc.

Do I want to have it screamed at me by a drunk idiot? Would I laugh at the “ancient word” and just call it a “word”?

I grew up in East London, it was basically a term of endearment.
It's a word to describe female genitalia, why should it be any more offensive than calling someone a dick. To find it more offensive is surely where the misogyny lies, can't possibly refer to someone as FEMALE genitalia, the filth!
Some people don't like swearing at all and that's fine, I don't swear much myself, but I don't think this word is any worse than many others

I hate it as an insult, especially from a man. It shows an unacceptable level of contempt, IMO.

On the other hand though. I've got one. As a basic word for it I don't mind it. It's better than pussy, and minge makes me heave.

I have no objection to the word itself in a vacuum.

I would very much object to being called it by a man, especially in the context of an argument.

Im sure you’ll just laugh at the “medieval word” if some man you accidentally cut up on the road leans out of the window and bellows the word at you

I would be affronted by the man leaning out of the window shouting at me, not because he called me a cunt. Of course the aggressive behaviour, and swearing more broadly, is an issue, but it's not the use of the word cunt that would offend me. Would you be less offended by a bloke swearing and shouting at you if he laid off the cunt word?

I remember being in a pub years ago and a male friend proudly saying how he despised the word and would never call a woman it, and I just remember thinking how patronising, like me in my sensitive female form couldn't handle a word?

*sorry he didn't say call a woman it, he said "say it around a woman" that's why I felt patronised.

I really can’t get worked up about it, why should a body part of a woman be seen as being “disgusting”? We’ve all got one!