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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask you to remind me not to smoke weed

123 replies

Dontchewitcharlie · 03/02/2023 07:25

Feeling depressed and this is when I start wanting to smoke weed.
I know it's bad and I had a terrible breakdown from it last year but my brain is telling me just get one joint and that's it.

Please talk some sense into me. I have no friends for support.

OP posts:
Original poster
Dontchewitcharlie · 03/02/2023 07:52

Whatislove82 · 03/02/2023 07:51

Can't people just keep their beaks out about my son please.

yes, that’s what you would like.

I will bow out because absolutely nothing we can do to change this child’s environment, and I find that depressing. Hopefully if the OP still doing this by the time he is at school, then at least school will no doubt become aware of it

Hopefully? You'd like that wouldn't you 😏

OP posts:
toomuchlaundry · 03/02/2023 07:53

People are going to be more concerned about your son. You have a choice how you live your life, he doesn’t

Kanaloa · 03/02/2023 07:54

Absolutely tragic. What did you do at the weekend Amelia? Well my mummy took me to the park and then we went to a cafe for lunch. What about you Johnny? I went to grandpa’s house and we did a jigsaw together. What about you, Michael? Well my mummy dragged me round for ages outside in the cold trying to find a drug dealer.

Kanaloa · 03/02/2023 07:54

But she was high all last year so I’m used to it.

Original poster
Dontchewitcharlie · 03/02/2023 07:55

Gosh I made a mistake last year and fixed it thanks to a major breakdown and now I feel an urge and I havve @Whatislove82

I've just realised what you're doing....THANK YOU 🫡

OP posts:
Original poster
Dontchewitcharlie · 03/02/2023 07:57

I wish people would read my updates.
THANK YOU it's helped and I can now carry on being a good parent again.

OP posts:
FatAgainItsLettuceTime · 03/02/2023 07:57

How old is your son?

Are there any play groups or classes like tumbletots you can take him to that you might meet other mums at?

Get yourself to some places where you have the opportunity to make some friends, stay local so the people you meet are likely to live near you and use the same schools.

Abreezeitheglade · 03/02/2023 07:57

Try swimming op. It gives that warm cocoon feeling that you’re after..

Whatislove82 · 03/02/2023 07:57

Dontchewitcharlie · 03/02/2023 07:52

Hopefully? You'd like that wouldn't you 😏

Show quote history

for the school to get involved if this situation is still ongoing?

Hell. Yes. I would

Whatislove82 · 03/02/2023 07:59

Dontchewitcharlie · 03/02/2023 07:57

I wish people would read my updates.
THANK YOU it's helped and I can now carry on being a good parent again.

Started the thread at 07.25

25 mins later after a number of posters have expressed concern for your child, apparently all is well and everyone should back off because problems sorted

Original poster
Dontchewitcharlie · 03/02/2023 08:00

I just needed a cross word said to me to kick me back into the Real world @Whatislove82
Have you not needed that before? If not you're lucky.

OP posts:
toomuchlaundry · 03/02/2023 08:00

If this was someone you knew, being high round their child and taking them for walks to find a drug dealer, would you think that was an okay life for that child or would you be concerned?

Tangerinie · 03/02/2023 08:01

Ona more positive note, think what lovely things you can do with and for your son with the money you save. Swim lessons, toddler sensory classes, trips out. There are lovely things to look forward to which aren't weed. Good luck op 💐

ColaBottlesYum · 03/02/2023 08:01

Hey OP! You sound very worn down. Life is hard and you are doing your best with the tools and resources you have. If I were you and I was able to pull myself out of bed (tough if depressed) then I would go to the library, baby groups, local farms, different parks using the bus, coffee shop in busy areas, charity shops, just to keep busy and out the house. I would also try and use music to cheer me up and maybe swimming or online youtube workout videos for people who have injuries or need low impact. I would also join a parenting class via council (I enjoyed meetingg others in mine and they gave me ideas for other groups) and volunteer or do paid work to meet people. I would also join a running club if I had childcare an hour a week. I would also call HomeStart to see if they can match me with a volunteer weekly to help me get out and gain confidence. I am really impressed you havent relented and had weed - well done xx

Original poster
Dontchewitcharlie · 03/02/2023 08:02

Tangerinie · 03/02/2023 08:01

Ona more positive note, think what lovely things you can do with and for your son with the money you save. Swim lessons, toddler sensory classes, trips out. There are lovely things to look forward to which aren't weed. Good luck op 💐

I'm looking now. He's going on a train to a soft play

OP posts:
toomuchlaundry · 03/02/2023 08:02

And what happens the next time you feel the urge for weed?

Does your son have interactions with other children?

Original poster
Dontchewitcharlie · 03/02/2023 08:03

toomuchlaundry · 03/02/2023 08:02

And what happens the next time you feel the urge for weed?

Does your son have interactions with other children?

I can save this thread:)

OP posts:
Original poster
Dontchewitcharlie · 03/02/2023 08:07

And I'm going to buy some new makeup

OP posts:
Batcountry8 · 03/02/2023 08:12

Excellent buy some new makeup for you.
I was just reading that the nyx foundation in boots is really good.
I used to have something of theirs a few yrs back and remembered it was good.
Eyeliner I think.
I've started eating jelly tots lol. So nice I forgot. Chew those. Distract yourself, cos they get really stuck in your teeth and it's a big distraction!

I've been on my own with my child years and every time we did something nice it always made me and child feel better.
Where are you going on the train?

CalloohCallayFrabjousDay · 03/02/2023 08:16

Dontchewitcharlie · 03/02/2023 07:32

This is the time when I really need some savage mumsnetters to have a go at me

Honestly, my friends that we're doing cannabis in secondary school and have continued are almost all now in dead-end jobs without many friends- their only friends are other druggies.

My mum lost two cousins in their thirties and forties due to drugs. All started from smoking weed.

Think about your child. If you can't do it for yourself then do it for him.

qwertykeyboards · 03/02/2023 08:36

Surely you don’t need us to tell us how bad it is that you were walking around with your child trying to look for a drug dealer?

OhIdoLike2bBesideTheSeaside · 03/02/2023 08:40

toomuchlaundry · 03/02/2023 07:53

People are going to be more concerned about your son. You have a choice how you live your life, he doesn’t

Exactly this
If you can't cope do the right thing and phone your GP

BE HONEST
You owe it to yourself and your son

Taking him out with you looking for drugs is dreadful especially the sort of people you'll come in contact with and if you get in trouble with debts with them and they know you have a child that makes him a target as well as you so it's a safeguarding concern

That's the reality

Original poster
Dontchewitcharlie · 03/02/2023 08:55

Thanks everyone I know it's bad but it's the little voice that says it's OK.
I'm going to take him on a train to soft play and hopefully he enjoys it. Then I will buy some nice makeup. I like nyx stuff so Thanks pp for the recommendation.

OP posts:
CoffeeLover90 · 03/02/2023 11:33

You're a braver woman than me @Dontchewitcharlie soft play is my idea of hell Grin glad to hear the feelings past. If you need a distraction there's always someone here to chat. Funny actually, I just saw an article on Facebook about the nyx foundation and was going to give it a go. My skins bloody awful.

Original poster
Dontchewitcharlie · 03/02/2023 11:46

CoffeeLover90 · 03/02/2023 11:33

You're a braver woman than me @Dontchewitcharlie soft play is my idea of hell Grin glad to hear the feelings past. If you need a distraction there's always someone here to chat. Funny actually, I just saw an article on Facebook about the nyx foundation and was going to give it a go. My skins bloody awful.

I don't like it either but I do it for him.
I don't know what to do in a coffee shop though. He won't stay in his buggy and I don't want him to eat cake or anything.

We both enjoyed soft play. I didn't get a foundation I remembered I always choose the wrong shade but i got some bronzer, a new eyebrow pencil, some eyeliner, lipstick and brushes. Feeling like I was before I got that urge so it's all good now 😌

I think a lot of it is because I have a running injury (the same thing triggered it last year and I was up and down the gp like a yo yo...none of the pain medication worked so I turned to weed and got addicted ) I was too obsessed with losing the baby weight and am now pretty much doubly incontinent and can be fixed with an operation. I need to find time to have that done. But I need to rest to be honest from exercise otherwise I'll do more damage than good.

OP posts:
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