Neighbour outraged I ignored the door

[Scrumbler]

For context I've lived in my home for 6 years, I have a baby and we get on with our neighbours very well usually.

Yesterday someone banged on the door a few times and I ignored it. I never answer my front door because everyone who I'm expecting use the side door. We get a lot of cold callers and religious people who knock alot so I will never answer it.
Today I see my neighbour and his son has a bandage on and I asked what happened, he'd had an accident yesterday in the street, my neighbour said his wife knocked on my door at the time for me to call an ambulance because she's panicked and left her phone in her house so I said I'd heard the knocking but didn't know what it was.
He looked at me completely gone out and then asked me why I'd ignored her. I explained I obviously didn't know it was an emergency or I would have course answered. But he told me I was selfish and slammed his door as he went in.
I carried on taking my shopping out of the car and then his wife comes out asking if I'd ignored her! I told her I don't answer that door and didn't know it was an emergency but she just went mad shouting how horrible that was and asked what kind of person doesn't answer there door.

I know their probably still shook up but I didn't know what had happened.
To clarify, their child seems fine from what the dad told me before he found out I'd ignored the door and turned out to be a very minor injury. I feel awful it happened but I didn't ignore them on purpose knowing they were needing an ambulance so I think they've been a bit over the top.

Hope you are OK OP, it's never nice when someone shouts at you and I'm sure if you had known it was an emergency you would have answered! Hope neighbours son is OK too!

I find it odd that the neighbour didn't return to her own home, did she give you a reason? Does she think you are medically trained?

I have a confession- I spent a month as a door to door charity fundraiser nearly 10 years ago (it was awful but I was desperate) and we had to knock minimum of 100 houses at least 3 times in a day if no one answered to be able to claim 6 hours work - it was usually 10+ hours knocking doors (plus additional travel time on top) but 6 was the max hours they would pay, 7 days a week.
The more experienced staff would make more sales and lived off delayed commission but even then the target was minimum 8 sales a day.
No idea if that would be allowed now but it was then.
I'm so sorry if I pissed anyone off!

As for the person saying there are no door to door salesman, this was from just before Xmas, a man was attacked for not buying dusters

www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-11545845/Salesman-attacks-homeowner-DUSTER-refused-buy-goods-faces-Christmas-bars.html

"A door-to-door salesman faces Christmas behind bars after attacking a homeowner with a duster and launching into a foul-mouthed onslaught.
Shocked Fenn Settle was attacked for refusing to buy anything after he came to speak to offender Sonny Brewitt who had been abusive to his girlfriend."

There are other examples too so people are right to be cautious about who they answer the door to.

I agree - it's weird, and I don't know anyone irl who is like this.

Firstly, the studies exist.

Secondly, obviously this is to be interpreted reasonably. In dangerous estates (south london? lots of knifing) perhaps few are leaving their doors hanging wide open. I don't think deprivation necessarily correlates exactly with danger. The council estates in my neighbourhood are notably deprived, but it's not the most dangerous area (right smack in the middle of where lots of politicians live).

The contrast is incredibly obvious, as I've said before. I have absolutely no desire to live in a council house, I don't think it's a romantic or desirable experience at all, but you'd genuinely have to be deaf and blind to notice that both interconnected streets/areas are like 2 different worlds.

Meanwhile, of course wealthy suburbia (even most residential suburban bits within London) can be friendly as well, especially if kids are involved – though again this is an example of necessity (kids having playmates) connecting us humans. (As a sidenote, in my limited experience from living in such areas - as I don't have kids and didn't care for a lot of their stupid street politics beneath the pleasantries – even "relaxed" socialising in some nice areas might not be that "relaxed", and can often be governed by casual formalities / unspoken rules / middle-class fixations.)

Don't really have a view on door openers, but am a little bemused as to why you decided to tell him you heard the knocking? That would (albeit irrationally) inflame the emotions of anyone speaking about their child's medical emergency.

You're not entitled to demand help from neighbours just because they share a postcode with you! How do they know you weren't sick/on the toilet/on an important work call!! I work at home, I do not answer the door when I'm working, unless I'm taking a break. People do not have a right to demand your attention.

Oi you! I resent that remark. I live in London. Right in the centre in the really touristy bit. I talk to locals and strangers alike. Nothing gives me greater pleasure than giving tourists directions. I hover if I can see people who look confused. That is because I am proud of where I live and crave praise.

People are always so grateful when they get over their initial shock that a Londoner is talking to them and isn't a front for a gang of traffickers in human organs.

I also like to give people my tips on affordable restaurants and always taking the bus over the Tube where possible for a free sightseeing trip. Don't believe people when they say no one ever talks to other people on the Tube. I'm happy to do that but please don't ask me to move my bag if another seat is available.

And if some clever dick shouts at you for standing on the wrong side of the escalators just say: "All right mate!" and just move. Slowly.

Don't people have front Windows on a house
Just look, if it's a seller or whatnot, just shout "sorry busy" and go back.
Not like windows are generally sound proof...

Lets hope their is never a fire or other incident that people need to warn you about. This is very weird.

Well this is Mumsnet where everyone knocking on your door is either an axe murderer coming for you, a paedophile coming for your child, or a woman with a penis wanting to use your bathroom as a shared space....so OF COURSE no-one in their right mind ever ever opens their front door. 🙄 Broken arm? Have you actually seen this broken arm? Of course not. Don't believe it. Its all a con so they can kill you and chop you into pieces.

@mostlysunnywithshowers I sometimes work from home too. What kind of vital work do you do that cannot be interrupted? Sometimes it breaks the tedium of my day for people to knock on the door. It's delivery drivers with parcels for the neighbours mostly but they are always friendly.

I usually find it not to much trouble to open the door. I can't remember the last time some called. Besides, it's not like I'm doing open heart surgery on my kitchen table and I only take one shit a day. Usually at about 8am about 15 minutes after my first cup of coffee. I'm an efficient shitter and it takes a bare 10 minutes. Though of course your bowel habits might be different.

I live in London. S London (yet again demonised on this thread), in a fairly gritty area.

I know every single person in our street. We help each other, look out for each other. We put our neighbours bins out, and back in, if they are away.
(Though obviously our occasional habit of knocking on someone’s door to ask some deeply threatening question like ‘do you have a radiator key I could borrow?’ causes terror.)
We have numerous friendly community initiatives.
Our local station is having work done, loads of extra stairs. This afternoon I saw No fewer than 3 people ask a woman with a buggy if she would like help.

Street of not posh terrace houses. Some owned, some council, some private rentals.

We answer the door to people!

I'm an efficient shitter and it takes a bare 10 minutes. Though of course your bowel habits might be different.

This thread has everything 😂

"I'm an efficient shitter"

I really love that a thread about neighbours knocking on doors has led us here 😆

Firstly, 😂😂😂

Secondly, that is not efficient shitting. Shakes head

I dream of this happening to me! Our house is kind of unique (not in a Tracey Island way, but in a crumbling round the edges way) and I always imagined it would make a fab location. But no one has knocked yet. Only nice neighbours and delivery folk. And the occasional politico who gets given short shrift or a grilling depending on how bolshy I feel!

Ours is not unique at all @faffadoodledo and that's why they wanted it. They were more interested in things like whether there was parking, access for lighting, large enough rooms for two actors and all the associated tech - we are a 1960s house with big windows and largeish rooms. It was a really interesting day, totally full on with 40 people descending on your house, but they brought their own loo roll, tea bags and urn and were very polite. They also wanted to hang curtains at our main living room window - we have roman blinds - so went and bought some very expensive curtains and a pole which they left after the filming and we flogged on Ebay. The child in the advert was filmed playing a football game on my boy's Xbox, they bought whatever the lastet FIFA game was and left that with us too.

When the adverts were eventually on the telly, you'd have been hard pushed to recognise it as our house. There are agencies you can sign up with to have your house listed as a location, you have more chance if you are in London/Manchester/Glasgow. A friend of a friend had her house used for a major BBC drama a few years ago, they paid her a ridiculous amount of money (think it was £5k a week for 4 weeks) and put her up in an Airbnb for the duration.

Only on MN are people weird about answering their doors! Just look through the peep hole to see who it is or put the chain on if you're a bit paranoid.

Just answer the bloody door

Only on MN are people weird about answering their doors! Just look through the peep hole to see who it is or put the chain on if you're a bit paranoid.

For goodness sake, people don’t have to answer their doors if they don’t want to! Stop offering advice on how to do it, I’m sure OP understands how these things work.

Are your two houses the only ones for miles around?

I presume they would have gone to other neighbours if one is not answering. They might be out, in the bath, sleeping....

I always check who's rung my door bell if awake and decently dressed.

I certainly don't need to be at anyone's beck and call 24/7.

This . At least if you had looked out you would have seen it was your neighbour.

My neighbours know that if they knock on my door and I’m in, I’ll always help them. I do find it a bit weird to ignore the door.

I don't really get not answering the door. How can you always know who's going to be coming on any given day - from parcels to neighbours. I've knocked on neighbours doors before with issues or queries without an appointment.

In my defence I'd like to point out that it was@mostlysunnywithshowers who raised the nightmare scenario of being stuck on the toilet when there was a knock at the door and therefore unable to respond.

I wanted to calm her. All I said was that it was my habit to shit after about 15 minutes after a nice cup of coffee which normally puts it at about 8am for me. It takes 10 minutes at the most which I think is quite efficient but I can do it quicker. It's just that I am leisurely in my approach to all things from shitting to answering the door. But I do get round to both sooner or later.

BTW I'm not claiming a world record but I'd be happy to accept a challenge of a shit off with you @Applesandcarrots if that's what you want.

All I was trying to do was to reassure @mostlysunnywithshowers that having more ponderous bowel habits (if she does) shouldn't be a bar to opening the door. After you've wiped and pulled your knickers up, of course - I'm not an animal . But no one should let anything, not even the call of nature stand between them and normal social interaction like opening the door when the neighbours call.

Just look through the peep hole to see who it is

Call me reckless or a posh bitch who lives in a nice area but I'm fearless about opening my front door. But whenever I look though the peephole I have flashbacks to a film where someone shot someone through it right between the eyes.

But I am not a gangster and I don't believe DH is either so I expect that is a groundless fear.