Page 9 | to ask school to replace shoes

NCshoess · 2023-01-31T17:25:40+00:00

4 year old ds is in reception, he got shoes for Christmas that he loves and has been wearing them every day. they are light up superhero shoes which is allowed, many kids have them. Friday he comes home crying in his gym shoes saying he was kicking his feet to make the shoes flash so the teacher took them away. I was going to ask about it yesterday but my sister picked him up. Today I asked his teacher she said she took them away, but then looking in the classroom she can't find them. I asked where they were and she said they might turn up. am I being unreasonable to ask them to replace his shoes if they can't find them...these were shoes he was asking for for ages, was so happy when he got them for Christmas and has been crying about having them taken away. I can't afford to buy him new ones atm...I understand taking them away for the day but not to give them back and then lose them is too far.

Johnnysgirl · 31/01/2023 22:32

Mumtobabyhavoc · 31/01/2023 22:23

@Johnnysgirl Scary? Really? Stop being a bully.

You really are something else, bless you.

PollyPut · 31/01/2023 22:37

@NCshoess did you label the shoes? If lots of children have similiar shoes then they can easily get mixed up - especially in Reception years. The sticky labels with their names printed on are great inside shoes

Sorted2856 · 31/01/2023 22:54

*GoodChat · Today 21:59
Sorted2856 · Today 19:15
goodchatHis shoes were flashing and distracting the other children.

really? The OP doesn’t say that. Reception kids have all manner of annoying habits. Mainly because they are 4 and 5. There is normally a behavioural policy with warnings/escalation. Being sent to the head would definitely feature before confiscating essential items of clothing at my child’s school.
Paragraph 2 of the OP Friday he comes home crying in his gym shoes saying he was kicking his feet to make the shoes flash so the teacher took them away.*

at the risk of being a pedant @GoodChat YOU say ‘and distracting the other children’; the OP does not.

and @Anothernameanother and other posters saying the head is too busy to deal with minutia like this; a lost pair of shoes may be a minor problem. But this isn't about lost property it is a complaint about inappropriate staff behaviour forcing the removal of an article of clothing and then losing it, so is very much to do with them. A head teacher would be the line manager of the staff no? Would complete an end of year appraisal? Be involved with a disciplinary? if it’s not the head then who would it be; the governors? This member of staff has made an error of judgement.

BlackeyedSusan · 31/01/2023 23:18

Benjispruce4 · 31/01/2023 20:01

Sugar free squash is full of sweeteners. Kids will drink water when that’s all that’s on offer.

No, no they won't. Some autistic kids will not drink water and make themselves ill before doing so.

Good luck getting the shoews back op

pleasehelpwi3 · 01/02/2023 00:18

TimeFlysWhenYoureHavingRum · 31/01/2023 21:27

Give the teacher a week to return them then go to Small Claims Court.

No, it's more serious than that. At least the High Court. Thank god we haven't left the European Court of Human Rights yet either. That would really show the wicked, shoe thieving joy stealing bastard of a teacher....

Addymontgomeryfan · 01/02/2023 00:25

My DC came home one day wearing someone else's school waterproof coat, I took it back the next day and explained to the teacher what had happened, and pointed out the name label of the child and said they must have been mixed up. The teacher came to me at the end of the day and said the name label had been ripped from the coat the other child was wearing so they couldn't be sure it was my DC's.

I sorted it myself the next day by taking the coat that was obviously my child's that the parent had ripped the name label out of from the cloakroom.

No way was I buying a new coat because another parent got lucky their child came home with an almost new coat instead of the hand me down her child was wearing originally 🤣

Anothernameanother · 01/02/2023 01:23

Sorted2856 · 31/01/2023 22:54

*GoodChat · Today 21:59
Sorted2856 · Today 19:15
goodchatHis shoes were flashing and distracting the other children.

really? The OP doesn’t say that. Reception kids have all manner of annoying habits. Mainly because they are 4 and 5. There is normally a behavioural policy with warnings/escalation. Being sent to the head would definitely feature before confiscating essential items of clothing at my child’s school.
Paragraph 2 of the OP Friday he comes home crying in his gym shoes saying he was kicking his feet to make the shoes flash so the teacher took them away.*

at the risk of being a pedant @GoodChat YOU say ‘and distracting the other children’; the OP does not.

and @Anothernameanother and other posters saying the head is too busy to deal with minutia like this; a lost pair of shoes may be a minor problem. But this isn't about lost property it is a complaint about inappropriate staff behaviour forcing the removal of an article of clothing and then losing it, so is very much to do with them. A head teacher would be the line manager of the staff no? Would complete an end of year appraisal? Be involved with a disciplinary? if it’s not the head then who would it be; the governors? This member of staff has made an error of judgement.

In a larger school, a year group leader or assistant head might be the line manager of the teacher.

GoodChat · 01/02/2023 05:25

That's not you being a pedant @Sorted2856, that's you being a bit slow.

Sorted2856 · 01/02/2023 07:00

GoodChat · Today 05:25
That's not you being a pedant @Sorted2856, that's you being a bit slow.

You are entitled to your own opinion but you are not entitled to your own facts. YOU erroneously claimed the OP said her son was disturbing other children and copy a quote where she says no such thing. I point this out and I’m the one who is a bit slow? Okey-dokey… you could have just said nothing or you could have admitted you are making assumptions or maybe owned your mistake re: what the OP actually says and what you read in to it, but no, you double down and make a derogatory personal comment about me….

Princesspollyyy · 01/02/2023 08:19

OP - let us know what they say about the shoes!

CrazyCorgi · 01/02/2023 08:24

Yes, they should definitely pay. DS damaged a teacher’s coat once by touching it when he had glue on his hand. We coughed up £120 immediately for a replacement as it couldn’t be cleaned/repaired due to the type of material. If schools will accept money then they should pay out, it’s only fair.

C8H10N4O2 · 01/02/2023 08:38

Mumtobabyhavoc · 31/01/2023 20:35

I would be thoroughly pissed off! That teacher is an absolute bully and did not have the right to take your child's shoes!
Demand they be returned or that the teacher reimburse you for a new purchase.
I would be seeking a formal reprimand for the teacher and would not let it rest. I'd go all the way up the chain.
I cannot wrap my head around a situation where an adult, a teacher of young children, feels the need to stifle the joy of one of the very young children they are responsible for.
FFS I have heard it all now. 😡🤬🤬🤬🤬
Again, your child's shoes were taken away!!!

And the Oscar for Performative Drahma goes to...

Anotheanon · 01/02/2023 08:50

Mumtobabyhavoc · 31/01/2023 20:35

I would be thoroughly pissed off! That teacher is an absolute bully and did not have the right to take your child's shoes!
Demand they be returned or that the teacher reimburse you for a new purchase.
I would be seeking a formal reprimand for the teacher and would not let it rest. I'd go all the way up the chain.
I cannot wrap my head around a situation where an adult, a teacher of young children, feels the need to stifle the joy of one of the very young children they are responsible for.
FFS I have heard it all now. 😡🤬🤬🤬🤬
Again, your child's shoes were taken away!!!

Oh my. I am so glad I’m not a teacher.

YouDoHaveAChoice · 01/02/2023 10:48

Anotheanon · 01/02/2023 08:50

Oh my. I am so glad I’m not a teacher.

Show quote history

Right? Imagine having to deal with people every day who think and act like this. Classy 🤣

GoodChat · 01/02/2023 10:51

@Sorted2856 if the child's making the shoes flash enough for the teacher to confiscate them it doesn't take a genius to read between the lines

WombatChocolate · 01/02/2023 10:59

Let’s hope there’s an update.

Ideally, OP will have emailed the teacher, simply asking for the confiscated shoes to be returned. No need for drama or blame or asking for money. Hopefully teacher has located the shoes and they are returned today. End of.

If teacher cannot find the shoes after an email, teacher will have to take next-steps. This could include checking other kids aren’t wearing the shoes, contacting parents etc.

Demands for money and lots of blaming the teacher and school are much further down the line and probably won’t be needed.

People are very quick to demand blame, recompense, etc etc. Usually these things can be resolved quickly and easily, with simple requests. Putting the request for shoes to be returned promptly in an email, means the request is recorded and swifter action likely. There’s no need to jump the gun, to later possible actions, when in all liklihood the shoes can be returned very quickly.

Sorted2856 · 01/02/2023 11:46

GoodChat · Today 10:51
@Sorted2856 if the child's making the shoes flash enough for the teacher to confiscate them it doesn't take a genius to read between the lines

who knows? The OP doesn’t and nor do you despite what you posted earlier. Maybe the teacher thought they were a banned item, maybe the teacher has a low threshold for irritability, maybe the whole class have them and 20 other kids had stomped already and the OP’s kid was the straw that broke the camels back. Maybe the kid was in a 1:1 situation so disrupting other children wasn’t even at issue. Maybe the teacher simply doesn’t like the OP’s kid and and decided to be heavy handed with them. I am speculating but I recognise I am speculating. There is a difference between hypothesising and presenting that hypothesis as fact which is what you did then made a derogatory comment about me because I pointed that out. Saying that it was disrupting other kids and claiming the OP said that when they didn’t is just making stuff up to support a particular narrative.

GoodChat · 01/02/2023 12:08

@Sorted2856 you're a bit too invested. Have a cup of tea. It's some kids shoes and the teacher wasn't wrong to confiscate them in any of your scenarios.

Sorted2856 · 01/02/2023 12:10

GoodChat · Today 12:08
@Sorted2856 you're a bit too invested. Have a cup of tea. It's some kids shoes and the teacher wasn't wrong to confiscate them in any of your scenarios.

ah now add a patronising comment to the derogatory one and the factually incorrect one. You’ve been called out and you don’t like that. Fair enough - just don’t try to style it out.

GoodChat · 01/02/2023 12:29

Sorted2856 · 01/02/2023 12:10

GoodChat · Today 12:08
@Sorted2856 you're a bit too invested. Have a cup of tea. It's some kids shoes and the teacher wasn't wrong to confiscate them in any of your scenarios.

ah now add a patronising comment to the derogatory one and the factually incorrect one. You’ve been called out and you don’t like that. Fair enough - just don’t try to style it out.

I've been called out? That's cute. I'm really not offended in any way. You're funny. Have a nice day.

Sorted2856 · 01/02/2023 12:58

*GoodChat · Today 12:29
Sorted2856 · Today 12:10
GoodChat · Today 12:08
@Sorted2856 you're a bit too invested. Have a cup of tea. It's some kids shoes and the teacher wasn't wrong to confiscate them in any of your scenarios.

ah now add a patronising comment to the derogatory one and the factually incorrect one. You’ve been called out and you don’t like that. Fair enough - just don’t try to style it out.
I've been called out? That's cute. I'm really not offended in any way. You're funny. Have a nice day.*

the lady doth protest too much - and packs another patronising comment in for good measure. You have a nice day too.

Whowhatwherewhenwhy1 · 01/02/2023 13:34

Totally irrelevant why the teacher took them. They took them so are responsible for them and if they have lost them absolutely should be responsible for replacing them. Reverse the roles. If the child had taken something from the teacher and lost or damaged it you would absolutely be contacted same day and told to replace or pay for the item. Teachers are supposed to be the role model and are not above having to take responsibility for their actions. Her response is inadequate just because she is dealing with a child’s belongings.

TheAllButterBiscuit · 01/02/2023 17:42

DH is a deputy head of a primary school, and says that after a few days the school would need to replace these. If the child was allowed something in school, then confiscation means the teacher takes care of the item- not loses it.

He added that flashing shoes at school are very distracting, and he would definitely advise keeping them for weekends, regardless of what other kids wear.

Hurdling · 01/02/2023 18:05

A teacher should never confiscate a child’s shoes in the first place, and yea the school should replace them and the teacher needs to apologise. What an ill judged thing to do.

Mandyjack · 01/02/2023 18:12

What right has the teacher got to remove his shoes!
If she's lost them then she needs to replace them.