Late picking up DD from nursery

[hellomynameissuzy]

I was 10 minutes late picking up my DD from nursery today. The educator that did hand over was not happy at all! She didn’t say a word to me, not even hello or goodbye to my 2 year old DD. She didn’t say anything when I apologised for being late so I couldn’t explain my reason for being late.
The nursery closes at 3pm, I arrived at 3.10pm.
I couldn’t ring ahead and let them know as my phone is broken atm.
AIBU to be upset about the educator being like this towards me? She has only been at this nursery since November. It makes me not want to send her back.

Maybe she didn't feel like smiling. This is just a tiny snap shot of the day. Maybe she'd had a really awful day at work and OP's child was calling her names and shit.

In the U.K. with constant rail strikes and cancelled trains with the slightest out of the ordinary weather.

I find it ridiculous especially if a one-off.

10 mins is barely any time at all

Is this the first time you’ve done this, OP?

The Holy trinity of parental rules for nursery parents:

1. Don't be late
2. You must be contactable while your child is there.
3. Don't send your child in with a contagious illness.

OP you broke 2 major rules at once. You messed up big time.

Ex nursery manager here. Picking up late is a no-no, but I would be really annoyed with my staff if they had been rude to a parent. It's unprofessional. Some nurseries charge a late fee, and this fee is something like x per 5 mins late. This charge then goes to the member of staff that stays behind. She was rude OP.

@Blinkingheckythump So you don't factor in any wiggle room into your plans for unexpected issues to arise which will make you late for your kid, but would be annoyed if someone was late for you? I wouldn't finish my job with only 10 mins to get my kid even if we were in the same building!

I work in a school and there is no wiggle room to finish any earlier. My journey is planned to perfection - 2 minute walk to the car, 3 minute drive and 2 minutes to walk to the nursery. We’ll, there you go 3 minutes spare 😁 I have not been late once.

I was due to pick my son at say 5pm from nursery once, I walked through the nursery door at 5pm on the dot, walked up two flights of stairs, waited behind a Dad faffing about with a child’s coat. By the time I said hi to his key worker it was about 2 mins past 5pm. She proper bollocked me for being late. They charged 68 quid a day. I just looked at the clock and took her telling off on the chin. She was about 21, I was 37. The next day she rang me very sheepishly to say another child had hit my baby and his lip was bleeding.

Yes, I’m sure you would be delighted if you were late to pick up your children and they’re left waiting at the school gate because of someone at work.

Late and no phone call? Come on, that's pants.

@plumduck

I have no idea why you're continually referring to smiling. OP says nothing about smiling. She says she was ignored. There's a huge difference. As I've said, unless you're on the receiving end of verbal abuse, ignoring someone completely when they converse you is unprofessional no matter how you're feeling.

Maybe your watch is as broken as your phone…….

Goodness the replies!!!! I assume anyone saying YABU has never been caught in traffic, or held up at the office! You'd think the poor OP has killed someone!
I'd have been furious at the silent treatment. If an adult can't communicate their feelings then what the frigg are they teaching your child! I'd complain and possible change nursery altogether

Obviously there is no excuse for people who just waltz up late on a regular basis.

However, if you’re in the childcare business, it’s pretty inevitable that you’re going to be dealing with people being slightly late fairly frequently, and should plan on that they will need cover for a short period after official closing time.

When I used to employ a nanny I employed her to start 20 mins before I needed to leave the house and catch my train, to provide a buffer for the occasional times she was stuck in traffic and a little bit late. I didn’t assume she’d be on time every single day, because shit happens.

If childcare providers are planning their time on the basis that they can simply lock up and leave on the dot of closing time every day, it’s just wishful thinking.

Possibly then she will be late for picking up her child from a childminder which will incur a late fee/miss a bus and need to wait half an hour for the next one/any other inconvenience. You shouldn't be complaining, you should be focusing on how to prevent being late in future and how to get your phone fixed quick smart.

You need to get your phone fixed.

She behaved improved

To everyone saying she was being paid to set a good example to children….. her working day was finished, so, technically, she not being paid to set an example to anyone when you’re late

Gah ...

She behaved unprofessionally but it is absolutely not acceptable to make contact in advance to say you are running late. It's obviously not ideal to be late at all, but in the event of some emergency, it's 100% your responsibility to be a in a position to call ahead. Cracked phone screen is not an excuse.

I used to be on the committee for a community preschool. When we introduced late fees, late collection went up as people felt entitled to use the buffer as they were paying for it. "What's the problem, I'm paying you?" Whereas actually it caused a load of knock on problems for staff.

Eventually we went with 3 late pickups in a term and you would be given notice. The situation improved dramatically. Although we did have once a very impassioned plea from a Dad on his last strike that he was stuck in traffic... from a landline number...

You need to network to get a mum back up team. There were about 6 mums great friends and still are who I could call in emergency to pick up if train delayed etc and I did the same for them. Life saver.

Probably irrelevant but if your phone is broke how would they get hold of you if they needed to?

sometimes life happens and people are late to pick up but you can imagine it it happens all the time (not saying by you but say different parents are late each day) it probably gets frustrating. Staff could have their own children too.

That would only work if your had a working phone.

It’s one thing if you’re talking about the end of the school day when lots of parents are around but at nursery or an after school club pick up times are more varied and the chances of another parent being available are much slimmer.

Last time I was running late I contacted half a dozen other parents to no avail.

YANBU. It happens. Fair enough if they were pissed off but that lack of tolerance would totally put me off them & the nursery. If they’re on that much of a short fuse what are they like with children playing up?

If an adult can't communicate their feelings then what the frigg are they teaching your child!

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