Boy breaks grandmother's arm by accident

[Nimbostratus100]

I am not going to say what happened next and what I think until I have heard a few objective opinions on here

The facts of the case

12 year old boy in sports club, leaving the main entrance on his skateboard, which he has been told is not allowed in the building, knocks over the grandmother coming to collect another child. The grandmother has a broken arm and needed an operation

This is a fairly elite sports club, you need to be able to play to a certain standard to by allowed to join. This boy has played there for a year. No serious trouble, several minor reprimands. Reasonably good player. Turns up for the team probably 80-90% of the time.

This happened last weekend. The sports club is meeting tomorrow. The parents have just heard that this boy has/has not been expelled and will/will not be there.

What do you think should happen? why?

I am allocating the voting by a toss of a coin to be random!

YABU - the boy should be expelled
YANBU - the boy should not be expelled

also, what else should happen, as well as/ instead of being expelled?

Thank you

I have never heard such twaddle in my life!

We have no evidence of her age or "dodderiness" at all.

And even if we did,
I have a 12 year old grandchild so am likely to be a similar age to the broken armed woman, and have never yet tripped over a dog or fallen over because a door slammed.

You are making points that have absolutely no basis in fact (or indeed, reality)

Where did I say the child wasn't to blame!? I even said it was caused by recklessness. I just think it's weird how many people are claiming this isn't an accident at all. It's not like he saw the woman and decided to ride at her at full pelt.

I broke my own arm (shoulder) early autumn. A man accidentally tripped me. I didn't know him. It wasn't his fault either-it was an accident-as I told the poor guy at the time, despite nearly fainting.

If the brain isn't fully developed enough to perceive consequences, then the child shouldn't be out unsupervised without an adult. Otherwise, as shown, he's a danger to others. Lucky the woman didn't hit her head and die.

This! 12yo would not do this at school and can’t do at sports club. Parents have to take this seriously and personally a big consequence would be appropriate. His recklessness caused injury. He should know better and this incident may be a good time to teach consequences and personal responsibility

Expulsion would be extreme over an accident, even an accident that could have been avoided if the child had adhered to the ‘no skateboarding’ rule.

Everyone hates ‘cancel culture’ until they get the opportunity to join the mob.

leaving the main entrance on his skateboard, which he has been told is not allowed in the building,

several minor reprimands.

Yes he should be removed because he continues to not follow the rules.

He was told no skateboarding and then carried on doing it.
He should be punished for this reason alone.

Perhaps a temporary ban would have been the best solution.

I don't think that can be classed as an accident, of course skateboarding out of a building is a completely moronic thing to do and highly likely to lead to somebody getting hurt, which it did.
Yes, he should be expelled. Broke the rules, which were in place due to being a dangerous activity

Unfortunately, expelling him won’t change the situation. If he’s remorseful I’d take it as a huge learning opportunity for him. As others have said, I’d take into account the victim and parents opinions but ideally would not expel him.
He shouldn’t have been on the skateboard but is a 12year old boy and I’m sure didn’t do it with the intention of breaking the poor lady’s arm.
Could he be put on some sort of probation period with very clear rules as a final chance?

He's not being sent to prison, he is being shown that actions have consqeuences. If he were to be expelled then so be it.

The amount of soft touches in here, I despair

Presuming it is a team sport I'd favour a suspension from the club for a period followed by a further suspension from competitive matches for a further spell and obviously a notice that if he is seen on the premises with a skateboard again he will be excluded from the club permanently.

Excluding him immediately seems harsh, but no consequences is far too lenient as well.

Was he on a skateboard inside a building ?

Honestly, no wonder there are a generation of entitled brats with parents that excuse everything.

I don’t agree he should be excluded, that’s too harsh in my opinion. I think he should be suspended on a temporary basis and given the opportunity to make amends and return with better behaviour.

but I’m shocked at the amount of people tripping over themselves to blame the victim, rather than a disobedient 12 year old who is old enough to know not to skate indoors especially after already being told off for it! Yes, kids make mistakes, that’s why they’re kids not adults! But if you don’t teach them that actions have consequences then you’re doing them a massive disservice and frankly it’s the reason we have a generation of absolute brats who grow up and become entitled adults who can’t cope with the word ‘no’ or when things don’t go their way, because mummy and daddy never taught them actions have consequences, or that some behaviour just isn’t ok.

Damn these hard core 12 year old criminals.

He didn't do it on purpose, but it was thoughtless and he was already told not to use it indoors. He's acting his age. Like all 12 year old and even adults, he has forgotten he was probably told not to use it indoors. 12 year olds have no scope on consequences or the ramifications of not listening.

However, this is why he needs a suitable punishment for his age - Not something which will destroy his sporting career and affect his physical health.

I would say he needs to be expelled for 3 months, skateboard also confiscated for 3 months, gaming console taken away for 3 months, grounded for a week or two. I would make him write a letter of apology, to spend any money he has on a gift for the lady, and I would make him offer to clean the ladies house and to run errands for her until her arm is out of plaster. I think this would be a good life lesson for a 12ur old boy.

I would also explain he is lucky there are no criminal charges to mark his record permanently.

Yes, actions have consequences, but the consequences should be reasonable and proportionate. A suspension might well be appropriate, along with a warning that any more skateboarding inside will result in an expulsion.

Permanent expulsion would be extreme for an accident, even though it was reckless.

So a kid who's doing well at his sport, playing at an elite level, with little interest from his parents. We don't know what else is going on in the kids life. Are they interested in anything he does?

We can assume there is only one place locally he can do the sport at elite level (elite places tend to be few and far between), needs to be local so he can get there himself.

It might have been stupid and careless but it wasn't intentional. Banning him seems really extreme.
What would the consequences be if he hadn't actually hit anyone or only hurt himself would you still be giving him a ban?
The crime is the same

Ridiculous. It was just an accident. These things happen.

It’s an accident. He didn’t do it on purpose did he? Surely the parent should have been supervising the skateboard use. I would fine the parents for not supervising effectively. And of course you owe the grandmother an apology and flowers would go a long way too.

@Nimbostratus100 - was there a gathering of parents protesting whatever the outcome was today (I think you mentioned that something was planned for today)?

I think he should get a punishment because he was warned not to be on his skateboard in the building but expulsion would be a step too far, particularly if he's been leading a very tough life for a 12 yr old, and if his parents aren't on the scene very much.

I'm not in anyway diminishing the seriousness of the accident but it was an accident. Children are usually pumped up after their training session and things they have been told to do or not to do generally isn't foremost in their minds.

Hopefully the adults will realise that they are overreacting and he'll be allowed to resume his sport in a short while.

I wouldn’t say expelled, but an apology to the lady and a couple of hours of chores for her on Saturday mornings for a few weeks until she’s healed up a bit. (Tried to put myself in the position of the mum and what I would like my son to do)

I wonder if the (already a minority) of posters reaching for their pitchforks would have such a strong reaction if the offender had been a young girl and the injured party a 20-something.

She deserves the exact same level of sympathy as would have been afforded to her had she slipped on an icy footpath, or fallen in her own home

no, she deserves the sympathy of someone knocked over by a kid who was doing something he was expressly told not to do a short time before

your examples are nothing like the situation. There was nothing she could do to avoid the situation.

80-90% attendance for elite sport is quite low - close to 100% would be expected.
several minor reprimands

he doesn't sound like a massive asset to the team

But it wasn’t an accident. Rules are there for a reason. He ignored them and the lady was injured. Actions have consequences. I voted to expel but actually think maybe a suspension would be better as he is only 12