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AIBU?

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Original poster

How can she be left like this? Take her back to A&E?

703 replies

Fearsheisdying · 23/01/2023 17:51

Posting for traffic has honestly I'm terrified something is seriously wrong with my Mum and don't know what to do so please be nice.

Last week she started with some pain that she says feels like it's right at the very bottom of her ribs and radiating round the sides. She was in agony, basically screaming with pain so I took her to A&E on the advice of 111. All obs and ECG were normal but the blood tests were abnormal. They were going to do a CT scan but then decided as her obs were ok and they didn't think there was a bleed as no fall/injury, they were not going to do a CT scan there but would refer it to the GP to arrange BUT because of the blood test results and recent weightloss, they wanted it done urgently under the "2 week rule" and from his grave tone, I highly suspect he thinks it's cancer and serious. They couldn't/wouldn't give her anymore painkillers because of the painkillers she's on for severe arthritis but these are not touching the pain.

Fast forward to today, she has been in absolute agony since Thursday and seems worse today and can barely move. She's exhausted and crying/screaming in pain. My sister called 999 today but they said as not life threatening they won't send an ambulance but had to speak to GP within an hour. GP receptionist tried to say no appointments so we couldn't speak to GP but after I explained the issue (and she could hear my Mum crying out in pain) she finally agreed to pass a message to the GP so currently waiting to see if GP will call back today or not. Mum says if I take her back to A&E we'll be sat for hours again and nothing will be done but I can't just sit here and watch her in so much pain and do nothing.

What do I do?! Do I make her let me take her to A&E? Do we wait to see if the GP will call? Just feel so helpless

OP posts:
OldFan · 23/01/2023 20:54

@poorbuthappy I think the 2 week thing is the time frame within which someone should get a scan after being referred by/speaking to? their GP.

KalvinPhillipsBoots · 23/01/2023 20:55

Please consult with your mums GP first thing in the morning. This is not an A&E job, she has been giving medication to assist with pain relief, and please everyone stop diagnosing and insisting everyone needs to go to A&E, no wonder our services are so badly stretched.

OhIdoLike2bBesideTheSeaside · 23/01/2023 20:55

Fearsheisdying · 23/01/2023 20:46

@AttentionAll she's used to chronic pain. For my Mum to be crying it really does have to be bad. She's in tears asking me how she's supposed to cope with this for 2 weeks. G.P said nothing has been sent/nothing on their system. I'll be honest, I don't trust her Dr's - they are in special measures

This sounds awful OP
Get your Mum in the car and take her to A&E without delay and demand to see the on call consultant this can't go on and hopefully they will see her.

JenniferBooth · 23/01/2023 20:56

Like i said.........its like a cult

AlleycatMarie · 23/01/2023 20:57

This pain sounds identical to when I had pancreatitis. I hope your mum is ok OP

Redebs · 23/01/2023 20:58

Gallstones.. pancreatitis... lots of things it could be. She definitely needs to be seen again at hospital.

Many years ago I had severe abdominal pain that was seen by GP home visit. I was screaming in pain and passing out, but Dr just gave codeine and went away.
24hrs later I developed Cullens Sign which has 40% mortality risk, but Dr receptionist on phone said as it was just bruising, I could wait til after weekend to see GP again. By then I had started to recover, no thanks to medical staff, but did scare Dr when he eventually saw it.

Remagirl · 23/01/2023 20:59

Can you take her to A & E? She may not want to go but it's the only way to get some help x

DamnThatHitsHome · 23/01/2023 20:59

Actually, most A&Es can’t do the scans and tests needed.

A&E’s role is basically to keep you alive to then pass on to other specialists.

I was discussing this with my sister in law only last week (she’s an A&E doc)- it’s a real problem when people think that A&E is fast-tracked medicine.

Dymaxion · 23/01/2023 21:01

Has your Mum had some oromorph @Fearsheisdying ? has it helped at all ?

squidgybits · 23/01/2023 21:02

Fearsheisdying · 23/01/2023 18:24

@SirVixofVixHall I don't think so. I've never had a gallstone but based on a friend who has, I don't believe it's the same place. Mum's pain is more on her sides (both sides) at the bottom of her ribs radiating round to the back? Whereas my friends was more under her breastbone.

@Blort we're in a paramedic strike area, so I suspect that might be why. She lives very near the hospital so actually probably quicker for me to take her. My sis doesn't drive and I was picking my children up from school but sis panicked I think.

@TinyTinyHamsterBalls sorry to hear about your Mum, is she ok? I'm not complaining they didn't send an ambulance, we're in a strike area so understand why they couldn't/wouldn't and am also painfully aware of a&e wait times but last week told us yes to CT and then 90 mins later said no. Plus Mum lives 10/15 mins from the hospital so quicker for me to take her anyway but I wasn't here when my sis called and she doesn't drive so I think she panicked with how much pain Mum was in. My issue is no one helping her with the pain. Why can't they give her something stronger and tell her not to take her normal ones if they ne

She's currently trying to fall asleep as she has not slept properly since Thursday night but she keeps grunting with pain and jumping when she does drop off for 5 minutes

Gallstones here and have had excruciating pain in the breast bone area ( swollen and tender)

Yb23487643 · 23/01/2023 21:02

Fearsheisdying · 23/01/2023 20:46

@AttentionAll she's used to chronic pain. For my Mum to be crying it really does have to be bad. She's in tears asking me how she's supposed to cope with this for 2 weeks. G.P said nothing has been sent/nothing on their system. I'll be honest, I don't trust her Dr's - they are in special measures

It takes longer than you think to get from a&e to Gp in some cases, esp if waiting for it to be scanned onto the system. Sometimes it’s electronic and available immediately.
should have decent pain relief and good safety netting - ie under what circumstances it’s appropriate to need emergency care.
but if you’re worried can go. If any deterioration while there at least you’re in the right place.

ButterCrackers · 23/01/2023 21:04

DamnThatHitsHome · 23/01/2023 20:59

Actually, most A&Es can’t do the scans and tests needed.

A&E’s role is basically to keep you alive to then pass on to other specialists.

I was discussing this with my sister in law only last week (she’s an A&E doc)- it’s a real problem when people think that A&E is fast-tracked medicine.

If you need scans and tests at A&E they have to be done.

Dunnoburt · 23/01/2023 21:07

Sorry I've not read everything...I would suspect something pancreas related xx

BornBlonde · 23/01/2023 21:08

So awful

IneedanewTV · 23/01/2023 21:08

DamnThatHitsHome · 23/01/2023 20:59

Actually, most A&Es can’t do the scans and tests needed.

A&E’s role is basically to keep you alive to then pass on to other specialists.

I was discussing this with my sister in law only last week (she’s an A&E doc)- it’s a real problem when people think that A&E is fast-tracked medicine.

i broke two bones went to A&E. they gave me two X-rays and an MRI scan as I had banged my head. I was treated, stitched up and left hospital with pain relief and antibiotics and told the fracture clinic would contact me in a few days. I say that was the full treatment.

EllaPaella · 23/01/2023 21:09

A&E can admit her if they think necessary. And to me this could be 'acute abdomen' so any number of potentially life threatening things. Acute abdominal pain that is not resolving and the person is doubled up in pain and requiring morphine IS an emergency. The cause of the pain needs to be identified. Even if it is cancer it doesn't mean it's not an emergency, it could be a bowel obstruction, perforation, any number of things.
OP - back to A&E, advocate for your Mum. Ask specifically how they can rule out a surgical emergency without a CT scan. As a pp said you are going to need to be firm and state the case for your Mum calmly and clearly.

Dymaxion · 23/01/2023 21:10

I am not saying that the OP's Mum should be fastracked for scans etc , but A&E can take bloods and obs and check there has been no deterioration other than an increase in pain. If nothing has clinically changed and she now has a pain relief option, then they will reassured to a degree. If something has changed for the worse she will treated on those clinical findings ?

LuluBlakey1 · 23/01/2023 21:12

Fearsheisdying · 23/01/2023 20:46

@AttentionAll she's used to chronic pain. For my Mum to be crying it really does have to be bad. She's in tears asking me how she's supposed to cope with this for 2 weeks. G.P said nothing has been sent/nothing on their system. I'll be honest, I don't trust her Dr's - they are in special measures

I had pancreatitis and it sounds exactly like that pain. It was caused by a gallstone getting trapped in the tube to my pancreas. It was excruciating and got worse and worse, even in hospital. I was crying out and sobbing in agony. It was at the bottom of my ribs across my front and sides. It showed in blood tests whenI went to A and E and I was kept in for over a week on morphine and other painkillers and a drip. I could not get from one dose of morphine to the next without sobbing with pain it was so bad .

I would take your mum back to hospital- if it is pancreatitis she can't wait 2 weeks. She shouldn't be expected to wait anyway in this pain.

MyBadName · 23/01/2023 21:12

I expect they have seen cancer markers in her bloods.

AttentionAll · 23/01/2023 21:12

IneedanewTV · 23/01/2023 21:08

i broke two bones went to A&E. they gave me two X-rays and an MRI scan as I had banged my head. I was treated, stitched up and left hospital with pain relief and antibiotics and told the fracture clinic would contact me in a few days. I say that was the full treatment.

Show quote history

A potential head injury and an injury that needs stitched needs immediate treatment which you had.

LuluBlakey1 · 23/01/2023 21:13

It sounds to me as if she needs to be admitted.

MyBadName · 23/01/2023 21:13

AttentionAll · 23/01/2023 21:12

A potential head injury and an injury that needs stitched needs immediate treatment which you had.

Show quote history

Yes - totally different situation.

AttentionAll · 23/01/2023 21:14

@Fearsheisdying I am sorry to hear the GP is so poor. She is very unlucky as that is unusual.
Go back to A and E if the morphine is not helping.

Wombatbum · 23/01/2023 21:15

I’d take her back to A&E. They can’t know for certain that her problem isn’t life threatening! As other people have mentioned, diverticulitis etc