3 year old member of Mensa.

[Toddlerteaplease]

Article in todays Times, (don't know how to link)
AIBU to think this is ridiculous, let him be a toddler, nurture his interests of course. But this is OTT, and asking for trouble. Apparently he wants to go to university and be a doctor.

He seems to have a loving, supportive family network (we are from the same area of the same county, so seen comments/responses from his extended family.

I really don't think I could ever discuss my DC with the media and do wonder why the parents have done so.

I'm always interested in what "of his own accord" means. Because my dc would have found it very hard to learn to read and count in different languages because they would have had limited access to them. I mean, I think somewhere I have Usborne's "First 1000 words in French" and I have a German dictionary, but other than that I don't think they would have had access to any other languages

I was also wondering about how he knew or accessed all the languages....? (I mean even on YouTube a parent is monitoring or choosing what a 2 or 3 year old can watch?) To be honest if either of my DC (they're teenage non geniuses) said they could count to 100 in anything other than English, French or German I would have to take their word for it!

I thought the mum seemed pretty laid back and Teddy was very cute

“Well, he doesn’t know, which is quite nice,” she told Today. “And we will keep it that way for as long as we can.“

Hmm… haven’t really thought that through then….

I'm in two minds. I have never bothered with mensa even though I am sure all our family could pass the tests. It seems like a vanity thing really. And I don't approve of him being in the press really

But at 2 my son already wanted to go to university and become a professor of physics (we drove past the university on our way to regular hospital appointments so we chatted about that it was and he knew his uncle had a PhD in physics and wanted to go one better ). And yes, he was having proper conversations before he was two. It was glorious to get such an insight into the mind of a toddler. He was dinky and had hardly any teeth so looked even younger.

And it's not unusual for very bright children to have an insatiable thirst for learning. I taught myself to read long before I started school -because I wanted to. My parents didn't have time to hothouse me.

Exactly . The pandemic was tough to begin with as my son was so gutted school was closed because he wanted to keep learning. We paid a load in the end for tutors and online classes and lots more books for him! (We were both working very full time,).

Would you let me know the book that's from? I'd be interested to read it. I think DS and I fit into the "high IQ" whereas DH and DSD are both diagnosed (high functioning) autistic- with high IQs. And yes I can see the overlaps but I identify with those key differences

Counting is a rote skill, denoting excellent verbal memory. Doing it in other languages isn't indicative of "fluency" in those languages. I can count to 10 in Japanese, Latin, Italian, French, German, Swahili, Spanish and English. I am absolutely not fluent in any language other than English.

The sums on the board in a picture in the newspaper article are laid out so an algorithm can be followed; again, this can be learned by rote with an understanding of English numbers to 20. Does he know what the answer would be if he had 5 people coming to play and each wanted 15 marshmallows?

I mean he's obviously got exceptional categorisation and rote skills. Can he apply that knowledge?

Rote learning is the knowledge (eg from reading or watching a video) that salt dissolves and sand does not. Application of this is the ability to design an experiment to prove this and separate salt from sand. The latter is more sophisticated.

Good luck to him; but I do think IQ testing in this very early age range is particularly inaccurate as a predictor of life success as it so emphasises rote skills and exposure knowledge (eg the names of the oceans, the points of the compass, days of the week in order etc).

What does "let him be a toddler" even mean. The whole idea of childhood is a social construct. It doesn't actually exist in reality.

Why are people so afraid of an intelligent 3 year old? Why must we celebrate mediocrity and ordinariness?

I think “childhood is a social construct” is a pretty dangerous line.

Of course children are allowed to be intelligent and an interest in learning should be encouraged, but children do not have the emotional intelligence or physical strength of adults. Which is why in most countries there are certain things that children cannot do, be held responsible for or consent to that adults can. I would much rather live in a world where children are seen as clearly distinct from adults than a world in which children are thought of as able to consent to sex or be exploited in a factory.

I would argue that this child cannot consent to having their face plastered all over the media, nice as the mother seems.

@Jellycats4life I was hyperlexic but not autistic! I can also read other scripts and probably seemed like a prodigy child. Now distinctly average (possibly below!)

What does "let him be a toddler" even mean.

It means mandarin segments, not Mandarin textbooks. The simple joys of childhood - I'm sure you can recall them yourself. Making a rocket out of an old washing up liquid bottle and playing 'space'. Uncontrollable laughter at the word 'poo'. Questionable (yet cute) drawings of Mummy with a yellow circle in the top corner for a sun. Humpty Dumpty.

I hope he gets to experience all these things.

The book is “a brilliant IQ: gift or challenge” by Lyn Kendall. I highly recommend it for anyone who has a gifted child.

to the PP above speaking about rote learning - it’s very clear when your child isn’t rote learning but has a deep understanding. Again I think so many people on this thread, because they haven’t seen it, just don’t understand. It’s sad because it results in so many negative comments and so much misconception

But the point will be that for him, learning IS like those things. He will still laugh at the word poo and will still have fun and run around but he will also WANT to learn. It will be inherently part of what he wants to do.

i thought he was cute

DS could do the same problem quicker when presented as a word problem, and did maths in his head preferentially. He just understood numbers inside out and back to front. He had to be taught written methods at school and still forgets the months of the year in order or how many days they have now and he is doing further maths at A level!

@RobertaFirmino do you not realise that for a toddler with a high IQ the learning will be a pleasure too? And that spending time learning doesn't prevent him enjoying all the other parts of being a toddler?

My son loved puddle jumping and playing with his friends and all the other simple toddler pleasures. But he also absorbed information like a sponge and made me set him maths sums in the car because that's how he enjoyed passing the time. It wasn't me hot housing, he (and I am sure many other high IQ toddlers are the same) really wanted to do maths, to read, to learn about the world.

He was on the evening news yesterday happily playing with play doh

At one point he was reading a book he was very cute, giggly and seemed completely unaware of his advanced abilities

my friends son appeared to be able to read at a very young age but was reciting quite a number of books word for word we thought he was a little genius

He's probably quite average compared to the typical MN child! 😄

I think you are getting the wrong end of the stick: I don’t think people have a problem with the parents seeking help from Mensa. What some people think is very foolish is to have this little boy splashed all over the newspapers.

Precisely. No sensible parent wants their child splashed over the front pages at such a young age, imo. That's not "down to earth" or caring behaviour, and the child can't consent to it.

Where is that from, out of interest?

Two of my dc are diagnosed with autism and would be better described by the right hand column (although some stuff from the left applies too). They are definitely autistic, but are also intelligent.

I was hyperlexic and am almost certainly autistic too.

I was going to say this. My dc could read at two. Autistic. They are fairly bright now at 16 but not a genius.

I think hyperlexia implies lack of understanding and my dc did understand the content. Remember them reading Stig of the Dump begore they started reception. But they are by no means a genius. Apparently I was the same (also autistic).

Mensa is a joke. To qualify for membership you need to score in the top 2% in their self-defined IQ tests. My children's school enables students to do the test each year if they want to, and more than 10% of the school population score in the "top 2%". Most don't bother to join because it's expensive, geeky and doesn't give you much for your money other than opportunities to network with other people in the "top 2%". They can do that every day at school!

^ And, I should have made clear, it's a comprehensive school!

😆