I’ve got no chance against the other side’s Solicitor have I?

[Watchingthetiderollaway]

Sorry not an AIBU, but wanted to post here for hopefully extra responses.

I appealed against a child maintenance decision and a Tribunal hearing has been arranged for just over 3 weeks time. I only found out last week that my ex has got himself a Solicitor, and now I feel defeated already as she’s clearly going to know every legal loophole there is in order to help him win the case.
I can’t afford legal representation and I’m feeling so pissed off that my ex can make out he’s broke to the cms but then be able to afford a Solicitor.

The only way I found out he has a Solicitor is because she contacted me asking me to send her all paperwork that I’m hoping to rely on in the hearing. Has anyone else been in a similar position?

Go in and represent yourself. You'll be fine.

And don’t send her anything

All you can do is try. Answer every question briefly and factually. Do not give more information than asked for, do not use emotional language, do not get angry. If you ex states something that is not true, ask the judge to hear your correction. If you are polite no harm can come your way from the judge.

The judge has a duty to ensure a fair trial - that means helping you get your side across.

Represent yourself and stay strong.

It might work against him, he could look like he's trying to out gun you, and as you say- how is he represented if he's making out he has no spare money?

The court may look at the situation and wonder why he has hundreds of pounds to argue with you but not to support his children.

Also it might be easier dealing with a a solicitor than with him directly, it's not personal to her. She might also be able to talk him into a reasonable compromise.

Hold your head high.

I’m open to correction but I have a feeling solicitors are obliged to be cautious when dealing with an unrepresented side. The facts are the facts, so as PP says, be confident and represent yourself.

Take a friend with you. In some courts you can take a 'MacKenzie' friend - Google it - to sit with you so you don't feel alone & intimidated, they can't contribute but can be a reassuring presence. Prepare what you want to say, with a set of clear, bullet points on each topic you want/need to raise. Be prepared to present any evidence you need to justify your complaint. Good luck.

I was considering not sending anything, but if I don’t I’m wondering if she can have any evidence I may bring to the hearing dismissed?
I thought it was up to the Tribunal court or the cms to post out paperwork to all parties and not down to me,

Solicitor may be on no win no fee by the way.

I may be wrong but I wouldn’t imagine they work on this basis for child maintenance

Please don't bottle out. I did, in similar circumstances and the judge just allowed my school x to have exactly what he wanted..he literally said "I'll sign whatever you put in front of me" . In hindsight, I should have gone, representated myself as I knew the ins and outs much better than a solicitor or barrister who'd had the file 5 minutes. They are used to self reps and won't bury you in legal jargon.

I’ll try not too! And I’ll give it my best shot, although I can’t help thinking he’s won already now he’s got representation

Do you have a court order that has a hearing date and what you need to do in the run up to the hearing? It may be that the court had said you need to send you evidence to the court and his solicitor.

Yes it's usual to exchange evidence before the hearing so that there's time to consider it. Ask them to do the same thing.

It says to send any evidence to the Tribunal court, but there’s no mention of sending anything to any Solicitor also.

I would think about any documents you want to rely on. Do you have any? If so get them together and send copies to the solicitor. Think about what you want to say - keep it factual - and keep going over those points before you attend court. Think about what arguments your ex might make and how you might respond. Has the solicitor sent you documents that they are relying on? If not ask for them. The judge should be fairly helpful and try to understand both sides. Good luck.

Judges really do ensure it's fair when one side is not represented. My ex turned up with a QC at family court!

Doesn't he get charged for every letter? I'd ask her can she access it through the court. Can she send you her evidence. What kind of evidence would she need? You don't have anything other than correspondence with him and he should have copies of all of that. All separately - would that cost him more?

Also if you're unsure about what you need to send and to whom, try phoning the court. They may be helpful.

It says to send any evidence to the Tribunal court, but there’s no mention of sending anything to any Solicitor also.

Then do exactly that and no more. You could email the solicitor 'As requested by the tribunal all documents have been forwarded to them. Unless ordered to by the tribunal I will not be copying these to you.'

I’ve got one or two documents, and I guess if I send those to her I don’t have to explain what points I intend to make from those documents, so hopefully she won’t know exactly what I’m going to say.
Ex works for the family business as a Director, without going into detail, I believe he’s hiding his money in the business, aided by his family, and not declaring the correct earnings.
The Solicitor hasn’t sent me anything

Blimey, at family court! I hope you’re right about the Judge being fair.

I would definitely raise it with the court that you have queries/concerns (whatever) about how he’s affording a solicitor when he says he can’t pay maintenance. Surely the Judge will also find that strange.

If I send her anything I would ask for her to reply with her evidence too, and I hope he would get charged for every correspondence she has to make!

Oh and, what a saddo, arguing about maintenance. These ‘men’ forget that they’re arguing over the provision for the children that they claim to love. When the child reaches adulthood, will they even want a relationship with someone who thought so little of them?

I’ve tried phoning them, but I’m at work when they’re open and I couldn’t stay on hold for long so I gave up.