Early morning starts with children

[Sacmagique75]

When I was a child in the 90s I used to wake up super early. I’d quietly put the tv on and watch live and kicking for hours until my parents emerged, I did not dare open their closed bedroom door before they woke and came out. Which was never before 9am on a weekend. I certainly didn’t barge in, demanding breakfast at 5:30, crying and whinging until they relented. My two young children have always been early risers but now at the ages of 6 and 4 is it too much to ask that they quietly entertain themselves with tv for an hour rather than demand I get out of bed before 6:30?

We have gro clock success. Any time before morning time (7am) I return DC quietly to their room, and just repeat that it's night time and they need to be quiet because others are sleeping. From 7, we do a nice big 'good morning!!!' and start the day.

I get the sentiment of this. But then I can’t help but think I’ve had the worst of both worlds - a childhood of obedience and compliance, and an adulthood of jumping to the tune of small children. I’d by lying if I said I didn’t sometimes wish they were just a tiny bit scared of me… 😬

What time do they go to bed?

Oh not that old chestnut

Did your parents smack you OP? My parents did and I wouldn't dream of doing half the things my young children do, but they aren't scared I am going to physically hurt them when they do something wrong.

It’s an expensive solution but I’d recommend a Yoto player - the full size one has a nightlight and the timing is controlled on the app so no way for them to override it, unless they have access to and can unlock your phone and can read to navigate the app. In which case I’d argue they’re old enough to get up without an adult 😂

OP I don’t think you’re being ridiculous. I wouldn’t be happy with mine eating unattended like I used to (choking risk) but getting up and playing in their room is fine. Thankfully my child is compliant and obeys the ‘no disturbing mummy until the clock changes colour’ rule, but if she didn’t I think I’d try some sort of reward chart to motivate her to do so.

My 5yo goes and gets her breakfast and puts the tv on on the weekends. At this age she understands it is rude to barge into our bedroom, she sometimes comes in and asks how long till we will be getting up, then she goes and plays.

Imo kids have to learn that they dobt get to demand things from eople whenever they want and sometimes they have to wait or do it themselves

Depends on their ages. If they’re under the age of 5 with no siblings I’d say let them play quietly in their room until 7am or so, then get up with them to get breakfast etc.

If they’ve got older siblings I’d say let them go downstairs together by the age of 4, but you shouldn’t be lying in bed all morning, you need to get them breakfast until old enough to safely do that themselves. I wouldn’t leave a child alone watching tv downstairs for ages - it’s lonely.

We have a 3 year old DS; he’s up around 6.30 and we take it in turns each day to get up with him and get breakfast and sit with him etc.

Is there any chance they are going to bed too early?

Gro clock and a packet of chocolate brioche and a drink left on the kitchen table. They get themselves a drink and a snack and then back into their rooms on their iPads til the sun comes up.

No, thanks for asking

I agree re ages, my youngest is 2.5yo and can’t be trusted awake and alone for long even “playing quietly” in their bedroom

My DSD started not waking us up when she was around 7.5/8. Now she creeps in to see if there’s life and usually goes back to her room if we’re lifeless. She still refuses to eat breakfast on her own even though she can access it all easily, so lie-ins are limited by that.
Patience OP, the day will come!!

I'm taking that as a yes on how defensive you sound 😄

I think parents in the 80s/90s weren’t so worried about safety etc like we are now. I know someone who works with my dh who doesn’t like her 12 year old being downstairs eating on his own incase he chokes 😳 I mean yeah there’s always a risk of these things happening but you have to be reasonable!

I was the same as you as a child op, used to sit downstairs on my own watching telly on a weekend until my Mum and Dad got themselves up. Usually about 9ish.

With my own dc I was up with them, from 4.30/5am sometimes, neither of them slept well. 🤷‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️ I would feel anxious leaving them to their own devices downstairs!

Ours we're getting own cereal at whatever bonkers hour they got up by age 4.5/5.
I'd suggest teaching 6 yo to help themselves and when they are up and running get them to help their younger sibling.
If they can't reach stuff then just leave it out night before or shuffle around your cupboards so they can start learning independence in the house.

Sometimes you wake up to milk all over the table and cereal all over the floor but it's just part of learning. And worth it for an extra hour in bed!

Take it however you like

Going to bed too early / too late is always suggested, for some children that is the problem, for some it isn’t. I’m guessing the OP has tried those very obvious options.

I agree! When myself and my DP were kids, if we'd gone into our parents room before about 9am on a weekend, we'd have been in enormous trouble 😂 I can remember waking up at about 8.30am at the age of 5 and entertaining myself until 10.30am when my dad would slowly emerge and come and make some breakfast. We found it madness that our friends were up entertaining the kids at 5am on weekends, not to mention it then meant they couldn't go away or stay with friends and family "because the kids (5 and 9) wake up early and will disturb the whole house". I always wondered if they'd ever actually just said to the kids "go back to bed" 🤣🤣

My three year old knows not to come into our room on a weekend until 8am and if she wakes us any earlier she's sent back to her room!

They're old enough that I have the opposite problem now, but when they were little I was the most boring mum on the face of the planet pre-7am. No access to tv, no endless snacks, no running around the house, no getting up and sitting on the sofa absent minded lay jangling a t-Rex around. It didn't take long until they realised that they were much better off either dozing until at least 7, or playing in their rooms.

Everyone has a better day when everyone isn't knackered and fractious.

DS7 usually wakes up at 6.30 am. He'll stay in his room colouring or playing with his toys until I open his door and say he can come out. He doesn't like eating when he first wakes up though, he needs to fully awake before breakfast so there's no hunger when he wakes. DS3 usually wakes around the same time as me and will just lie in bed until I tell him it's breakfast time. Maybe I'm lucky....

I cannot believe the level of complete wetness from half the parents on this thread. Take the poster above for example, why on earth would you not tell your daughter to shut up/be quiet! No wonder there are issues with behaviour in schools if there are seemingly so many parents utterly unable to put in any sort of routine or boundary. The idea that everyone gets up at 5am because the little emperors need entertaining is absurd

Same as some pps - from 4yrs ish DD used to make herself breakfast and put the TV on. She knew she couldn't go downstairs until after 6.30.

I chuck mine breakfast and tell them to play in their room and put TV on,I either doze a bit longer or relax with a brew in peace.i don't think it's too much to ask for when they've got plenty to keep em busy nowadays,cartoons 24/7 etc

“The idea that everyone gets up at 5am because the little emperors need entertaining is absurd”

isn’t it? A good job no one is suggesting that