Early morning starts with children

[Sacmagique75]

When I was a child in the 90s I used to wake up super early. I’d quietly put the tv on and watch live and kicking for hours until my parents emerged, I did not dare open their closed bedroom door before they woke and came out. Which was never before 9am on a weekend. I certainly didn’t barge in, demanding breakfast at 5:30, crying and whinging until they relented. My two young children have always been early risers but now at the ages of 6 and 4 is it too much to ask that they quietly entertain themselves with tv for an hour rather than demand I get out of bed before 6:30?

You are generally sounding amiable and amused about it. Maybe that’s the issue?

Your children don't owe you anything, not a sleep in or a certain amount of time in the morning. You chose to bring them into the world, so you just suck it up. They wake up and want/need you, you just get up and parent. End of story.

So you see children as being in a one-way almost parasitical reltionship, rather than a dynamic two way relationship where they learn about other people's needs and preferences?

What other needs/wants should parents just suck up and do nothing to influence or shape? They just want to play recorder at 5am, jump on the furniture, play cricket indoors etc?

There's a balance in everything, it does kids good to learn other people have needs too. You're not just a passive servant.

Your children don't owe you anything, not a sleep in or a certain amount of time in the morning. You chose to bring them into the world, so you just suck it up. They wake up and want/need you, you just get up and parent. End of story.

This could be the opening paragraph to "How to raise entitled shits"

@user8545

I know right? So because we gave birth we are forever slaves with no wants or needs of our own? Riiiight 😂. Sounds like someone got out of the wrong side of the bed (possibly a bit too early 😉). I tend to like my kids a lot better after a long sleep too, so don’t worry 😁.

Hahaha!!

This is why so many kids are little shits nowadays.

Away back to your bed. You'll feel better after a lie in.

I don’t know if you meant it this way but your question seems goady, like you think the poster gives some sort of threat or punishment! Isn’t it pretty obvious? If they wake up and don’t stay in their room then - like my children - they are asked to return to their room until the clock wakes up. Like OP, as a child if I woke very early I got up quietly and occupied myself playing / reading for a bit. My children do the same. It’s a routine and it’s really not much to ask.

I tend to like my kids a lot better after a long sleep

I'm sure they like you more for it too

I would bet my house on most ‘little shits’ not being children in homes where parents get up with them, get them breakfast and ensure they are safe.

I really would.

I just put my children to bed later at night!!!

Never mind - hang on in there - once they hit their teens you can get your revenge and a lie in!!

I would bet my house on most ‘little shits’ not being children in homes where parents get up with them, get them breakfast and ensure they are safe.

I really would.

You think teaching children that getting up at 6 is too early and that they can stay in their rooms if they do until 7 and read or play until mum and dad get up is the same as the parents not getting up and attending to your child or ensuring that they are safe? Do you think these parents just lie in bed while they hear their children cry or bang about the house endangering themselves? Or do you think they've spent time teaching their children to stay in bed or quietly stay in their rooms and play if they're up earlier than the rest of the house?

Children who dictate every single moment of an adult's day past a certain age are indeed little spoilt shits. There is nothing wrong with teaching a child that certain times are too early to get up. The same way that they learn that they can't eat what they want when they want, can't skip brushing their teeth whenever they please, and can't stay up late at night watching tv. They need to be taught these things and those parents teaching their children that, no, we don't get up at 4, 5 or 6 am and demand everyone gets up with us, are entirely sensible.

As I said in an earlier post, it’s age dependent, isn’t it? A twelve year old up at 5 and demanding everyone gets up indeed would be. A four year old, less so.

There are some posts on here that are a bit uncomfortably close to celebrating neglect.

@stephfennell

thats the way to raise entitled kids who go on to become entitled adults

you don’t have to martyr yourself entirely

@Sacmagique75

id be telling them they can wait for their BREEEAAAAKKKFFFAAASSSTTTT and I would go back to sleep
they won’t be starving or malnourished

@Getinajollymood

i disagree

kids need to learn that they aren’t the centre of the universe and that other people including their parents also have valid needs and wants

mine is 6 and I now prepare their cereal.in the bowl with a cover over it and put a little jug of milk in the fridge, he is happy at the weekends to make his own breakfast with this method and watch tv until I get up. Prior to the breakfast prep he always woke me up because he was hungry, which is fair

There are some posts on here that are a bit uncomfortably close to celebrating neglect.

I must have missed those posts...

Quite the accusation to throw at posters. Saying they are celebrating neglecting their children.

I say good on you to anyone on this thread teaching their children the appropriate time to get up in the morning and that they cannot dictate when the rest of their family gets up to cater to their demands. You're raising sensible, self-sufficient children. Enjoy your family breakfasts together when everyone is refreshed and awake together.

I think there are two different things being discussed:

Gro clock and other methods to keep kids in their rooms for up to an hour or so - totally fine

Very young children totally unsupervised for hours downstairs - neglect

To pick one example:

Mine are 10, 7 and 4. Id say the last 18 months I can sleep in til 9/10ish on a weekend. They grab their tablets and chill, if they get hungry then my eldest is usually willing to forage for biscuits and juice til I wake up for them all

That is children who were approximately 8, 5 and 2 being on their own for likely at least 2 hours.

@Everydayitsgettingcloser

My youngest wakes at 7ish and I will get up around 9. It’s really not that long to chill for a bit on your tablet or whatever it is you want to do. I then wake up and we all have the best Saturday breakfast in the world, melted cheese on toast of course. It’s a real non issue in the real world.

How old is your youngest?

Hahaha, I feel great. I have to wake my kid up every morning. He loves to sleep :)

Hahaha, I feel great. I have to wake my kid up every morning. He loves to sleep :)

Then you definitely don't get to judge other parents implementing boundaries for their children so that everyone gets enough sleep. Wind your neck in.

@Everydayitsgettingcloser

My youngest is 7, all my kids have done that routine though from school age, so age 4? A real non issue, they’ve never been dunces or unable to understand a very simple concept of an adult lie in. It’s mad how many wet wipes there are on mumsnet and in wider society in general though. You’ve literally got kids who have their parents running around like blue arse flies from the moment they open their eyes in the morning.

Mine doesn’t get up till 8 on school days and about 9 or 10 on weekends. Only 9 years old. I’m know I’m pretty lucky. Does go to bed late though, about 10pm. I’d rather that then early starts though.